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Kaptin M
6th May 2005, 22:39
A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked, "Little Johnny what is your problem?"
Little Johnny answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

The teacher had had enough. She took Little Johnny to the principal's office.

While Little Johnny waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.
The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
The teacher agreed.
Little Johnny was brought in, the conditions were explained to him, and so he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Little Johnny: "9"
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Little Johnny: "36"

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grader should know.

The principal looked at the teacher and told her, "I think Little Johnny can go to the third-grade."

The teacher said to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"
The principal and Little Johnny both agreed.

Teacher: "What does a cow have four of, but I have only two?
Little Johnny: "Legs"

Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have in mine?" (The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
Little Johnny: "Pockets"

Teacher: "What does a dog do, and a man steps into?"
Little Johnny: "Pants"

Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
Little Johnny: "Coconut"

Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
Little Johnny: "Bubblegum"

Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?" (The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
Little Johnny: "Shake hands"

Teacher: "Now I will ask some '"Who am I" sort of questions, okay?"
Little Johnny: "Yup"

Teacher: "You blow me, you feel good"
Little Johnny: "Nose"

Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver"
Little Johnny: "Arrow"

Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement and liquids?"
Little Johnny: "Firetruck"


The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put his ass in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."

Rabid Dog
10th May 2005, 04:46
Obviously not our esteemed PM.