View Full Version : The Harp ...why?

Onan the Clumsy
2nd May 2005, 15:36
I'm listning to streaming audio at the moment and they have a revolting harp piece on. It's even worse than the banjo. There's only one thing you can do with a harp and that doesn't require any training. Anyone can run their hands up and down the hideous thing and make that noise that's always used when you have an ocean scene in a movie.

Oh I know there's plucking as well, but let's fce it, that always sounds like the harpist is just moving around on his seat because he's so uncomfortable and he accidently catche the buttons on his cuff, or maybe his belt buckle and pling! there's a note ...or ten.

And why would anyone want to take up this hiddeous instrument. If I was going to be a musician, I'd choose the flute so I could carry six of them in my pocket. The harp is a little like a hot air balloon. You might play it, but you meed a team of ten to support you.

Then look at the people that play it: They're all long haired emaciated women in long flowing gowns with vacant expressions and headbands. What's with the headbands anyway? and the flared sleeves? and the pouch of herbs hanging of the gold chain belt? Well we know what they're for, but who could blame them after having their ear right next to a harp all day.

:zzz: :zzz: :zzz:

2nd May 2005, 15:42
They're all long haired emaciated women in long flowing gowns with vacant expressions and headbands

Just the sort of woman Jumbojetjockey would like :E :E

2nd May 2005, 15:54
Pretty pleasant pluckers....

tony draper
2nd May 2005, 15:59
One longed to see ones wife in something long and flowing, preferably the River Tyne.
One has been watching Benny Hill.

2nd May 2005, 16:27
The Nile would be better. There are no crocs in the Tyne..

2nd May 2005, 16:34

2nd May 2005, 16:58
One quite enjoy's the odd phluck....!!
Espescailly with a harpy!!
hat coat

Quick question.........who was the Marx Bro who played the harp so well?

Solid Rust Twotter
2nd May 2005, 18:02

2nd May 2005, 18:27

That's the only kind of harp I'd go for - but only if there was no Tanglefoot, Speckled Hen, Pendle Witches' Brew, etc, etc on offer


2nd May 2005, 18:47
Now I can tell you a story about how sick Mr Jerricho got one night drinking bloody Tanglefoot. It seemed like a great idea at the time.

2nd May 2005, 19:13
I'll have you lot know that there was a chap called Errin who twanged a mean string back when men were men and would take of their own hand to claim a piece of sod. Wasn't always a pansy instrument.

2nd May 2005, 19:17
Come on then Jerri, tell us about it;)

2nd May 2005, 19:40

You're at it again :p

The harp, played properly, it a fabulous instrument. By properly, I mean Traditional Celtic Harp as played by the late Derek Bell of The Chieftains. His seminal album "Derek Bell Plays With Himself" is a joy.

Or, how about Handel's Harp Concerto. Superb.

Trust me.



PS - I don't play the Harp.

PPS - Don't even think about having a pop at the bagpipes but feel free to have a go at soprano saxophones (not the others; they're good. Specifically soprano).

2nd May 2005, 20:13
Don't even think about having a pop at the bagpipes
[b] Definiteliy not !

Cornish Jack
2nd May 2005, 21:22
Not sure whether this is off topic or not, but for anyone with an interest in quality wood manufacturing and/or engineering, have a close-up look at a harp (concert hall variety) - quite breathtaking and far more complex than one might suppose if only seen from a distance.

Onan the Clumsy
2nd May 2005, 21:56
You could always use one to make chips for your supper.

Maybe that's what they do with all the old ones, sell 'em to chip shops.

tony draper
2nd May 2005, 22:13
There used to be a Zither in the house when one was a sprog, thats a kind of Harp,hmmm one wonders what happened to that? one could bang out the Harry Lime theme on it as well.

2nd May 2005, 22:37
Well ExSim, let us just say that it was my first time drinking ale. It was also my last time drinking ale. That stuff just doesn't agree with me.

(Actually, that's not entirely true. I did have a couple of pints of Ringwood one night and it had the same effect.......:yuk: )

Thing is though, I think it tastes great.

3rd May 2005, 00:20
Jerrricho what are ya drinkin' in the 'Peg if not ale? Blue? :D

3rd May 2005, 00:48
Ah Mr. D - the Zither. A sort of mini, horizontal harp if I recall.

Quite rare I thought, but remember it vividly from many moons ago being played in a small Austrian town beer keller.

It's uniqueness made it quite enjoyable to one's ear.

3rd May 2005, 03:38
Jerri, You have to practice ;)

Loose rivets
3rd May 2005, 04:12
Terrible memory for names, but was it Shirly Abbicare? spelt phonetically-- ish

3rd May 2005, 06:07
James Galway and Maria something. . , on "Concerto" many years ago. Mozart's concerto for clarinet and harp.

Maria, a wonderfully curvy Spanish woman with a throaty laugh, replied to a question on how does one become good on the harp,
"Well, if you start practising at age 2 and play til you die, then, perhaps, you'll approach something worthwhile."

As with most instruments the context is very important, with what do you accompany what?

Of course. bagpipes go with a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g. .


3rd May 2005, 06:09
......was it Shirly Abbicare
Never tried that......Birmingham brew, is it?

3rd May 2005, 06:54
Harp lager?? Vapid crap.:yuk: :yuk:

Capn Notarious
3rd May 2005, 07:11
Now that is worthwhile: used to go fishing in the aforementioned London Reservoir.

3rd May 2005, 09:37
Shirley Abicaire, the infamous Australian Zitherist (?) who really fancied a bit of Willy.

At least she always said that Willy could... :ooh:

Windy Militant
3rd May 2005, 09:55
Mr Clumsy, I was going to say that if you don't like harps then your not going to like what's past them Pearly Gates. Then I thought he's a Jetblaster so that's not really going to be an issue is it! :eek:

Any way here's something to help stoke the fires.

HRH Prince of Wale's personal harpist Catrin Finch (http://www.newburyspringfestival.org.uk/images/may21.8.jpg) :E

3rd May 2005, 15:52
Piggy : Whiskey (and whisky) :ok:

3rd May 2005, 16:09
My 16 year old niece - I won't describe her physical attributes as there's a couple of moderators who get upset by that sort of thing - decided she wanted to learn to play the harp when she was about eight or nine years old. Having convinced her parents that she was perfectly serious about it, she started having lessons and subsequently persuaded her teacher that she was a pupil to be encouraged and taken very seriously. Her first harp was duly purchased for the price of a nice holiday for two.

Two years ago her second (larger) harp was purchased and it is an absolute joy to hear her play. That one cost about one and half PPLs.

The next harp she'll have (full size) will cost the same as a very decent car so this is not perhaps a skill that most parents would encourage.

4th May 2005, 02:51
Mmm... I think she's wasted on Charlie Battenburg Windy

I wonder if she's interested in learning to play the bagpipes? I do give lessons. :hmm:

4th May 2005, 04:11
Always seemed to me that the harp would make a good offensive weapon. Well, yes, they are anyway, but I mean with arrows. Good solid frame, steady support, and all those different-length strings - ideal for varying ranges.

And the earlier post referring to 'vapid [email protected]' - that could also refer to Canadian harpist (or is it 'harpy'?) Leona Boyd. (Doubtless the mods will keep me out of libel suits on that one...)

CarltonBrowne the FO
10th May 2005, 19:22
I'd just like to concur with *********'s post- the harpist in question is far from emaciated, fills out a ball gown very nicely indeed as it happens. I would venture to speculate that her attendance at a bash would turn most of the male attendees into avid listeners of harp music!

12th May 2005, 01:28
Harpist? I though harp players were called Harpies...

A Harpist is someone who isn't quite sober, nor quite pissed.

Onan the Clumsy
16th May 2005, 20:54
I take it all back.

I just listened to Mozart's Harp and Flute concerto on the radio.Quite pleasent.

Much better than his Banjo concerto :E

16th May 2005, 21:14
Yes Onan, I will have to concede that one to you! I thought his Banjo Concerto (K.756) was essentially a rehash of his masterpiece, the Clarinet Concerto! Actually, all Mozart's music is a rehash of his Clarinet Concerto even though it was one of the last pieces he wrote!

Try also Handel's Harp Concerto; you will be pleasantly surprised but don't even think about his Jew's Harp Concerto (sorry, I'm not allowed to call them that anymore; it's a Jaw Harp!!)