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PerArdua
12th Apr 2005, 08:46
Driving to work along a very boring road I got to wondering and guessing who drives what kind of car. My starter for ten (all seen this morning!!)

Tigra - Young lady/successful/nice suit

BMW - Young single man/suit/sunglasses

Ford Mondeo (old style) - Old man/angry face

VW Passat Estate (new) - Someone who is very late and obviously immortal:mad:

When you see a car can you guess who might be driving... Over to you

Sparkle
12th Apr 2005, 08:57
YAAAAAAAWWWWWWNNNN! :zzz:

SyllogismCheck
12th Apr 2005, 08:57
Latest shape Renault Clios, especially black or silver ones, seem to be driven by attractive young ladies 9 times out of 10.
Something to do with Va va voom no doubt. :ok:

Jerricho
12th Apr 2005, 08:59
BMW - Young single man/suit/sunglasses

Who knows Israeli martial arts :E

Taildragger55
12th Apr 2005, 09:09
Who knows Israeli martial arts

Remember the Batman fights with "Pow", "Thump" etc. appearing on screen as they fought?

I can't stop seeing a fight in my mind of blacksuited rabbis with "Oy Vey" and "Mazel Tov" popping up .



Here's hoping that no Krav Maga experts know where I live

PerArdua
12th Apr 2005, 09:09
I quite like the new Volvos, they are being driven more like Saabs used to be. Quietly making progress and not upsetting people.

I drive an old Passat and I try to be courteous to other drivers but I get frustrated by the drivers who obviously own the road irrespective of what they drive.

PA

Taildragger55
12th Apr 2005, 09:15
Someone who thinks a car is a necessary evil for getting from A to B rather than an exact expression of his identity,
who saves his spare shekels for flying rather than buying tin status symbols, who believes that one's adrenelin rush should be got from recreational activities rather than from putting the lives of fellow road users at risk,
who thinks cars are a boring consumer necessity on par with a washing machine.

Windy Militant
12th Apr 2005, 09:21
I drive a clapped out Vauxhall Ashtray Oiler Estate.
When people ask what the horrible rattling noise is I reply " Oh it's just ten grands worth of loose change rattling about in the footwell! ;)

Stockpicker
12th Apr 2005, 09:28
Spot on, Per Ardua !

SP

(Passat Estate Driver)

PilotsPal
12th Apr 2005, 10:32
SC

An interesting observation on Clio drivers: both my 19 and 21 year old nieces drive new-style Clios, and the 16 year old is already checking available colours for hers later this year.

topcat450
12th Apr 2005, 11:09
Clio's are renowned as being totty cars. Corsa's are generally still totty however less classy (ie a cheaper date).

Nova's are always, without fail, driven by chavs who need a slap.

Ford Ka's are either young totty, or someone who'd be regarded as 'Mutton Dressed As Lamb'.

Suzuki vitara's - hairdressers car - regardless of the sex of 'em

Fiat Multipla - surely only owned by the blind.

I could go on but I won't.

timmcat
12th Apr 2005, 11:17
I think we touched on this once before, but, my tuppen'th worth:

New Mini: Twenty something females with long straight hair and usually damned attractive.

Old Mini: Skint student.

Saxo: Late teens female who has bothered to go out and buy her own car instead of relying on her mothers...

Toyota RAV4 or any sub-prime 4x4: Thirty / forty something female on the school run with sunglasses on her head even when its a foggy November morning.

Vauxhall Zafira: Bloke with too many kids:uhoh:

Capn Notarious
12th Apr 2005, 11:28
Vauxhall Zafira: Bloke with too many kids


Or owned by a caravan hauling; well respected Ppruner who has handled many children.

Duckbutt
12th Apr 2005, 12:02
Per Adua, shouldn't you be driving an Astra?

Gouabafla
12th Apr 2005, 12:07
Mondeo Estate. Bald middle aged man with wife, two kids and a dog.






Looks in mirror to check that description is accurate.

Stockpicker
12th Apr 2005, 12:07
Nah, 'e 'ad one, Duckbutt !! :}

timmcat
12th Apr 2005, 12:30
Or owned by a caravan hauling; well respected Ppruner who has handled many children
That post is NOT an excuse for another tasteless Michael Jackson joke..........

McAero
12th Apr 2005, 12:31
New Mini: Twenty something females with long straight hair and usually damned attractive

Maybe my mate Steve does have female tendencies after all..................... :ooh:

I drive a Volkswagen Bora (still can't get head around the name)........mind you, I drive anything my folks have :}

ORAC
12th Apr 2005, 12:40
MX-5, fifth one in 12 years. Going to trade it in for the new 2.0 model in November. And I aint a hairdresser.....

McAero
12th Apr 2005, 12:48
Of course you're not a hairdresser....... , you're a "hair engineer". :E

Onan the Clumsy
12th Apr 2005, 13:03
Ford Mondeo (old style) - Old man/angry face So, Herr Draper drives a Mondeo? :p

PerArdua
12th Apr 2005, 13:05
Duckbutt I will stick to the Passat if it is alright by you, 53mpg and a good radio.

Rushton
12th Apr 2005, 13:09
Clio's are renowned as being totty cars.

Topcat - You calling my daughter totty! Right where's me Yellow Pages - now where's the Israeli Martial Arts section?

gatfield
12th Apr 2005, 13:34
Any white van driving around NZ;
Some Maori bro, 25 kg overweight ,with 8 cus's in the back.

phoenix son
12th Apr 2005, 13:37
2002 MG ZS...

Nice, reliable car with a bit of poke when I need it, 4 doors and a boot for the family (still feels weird saying that...)

Looks sporty without looking chavvy (is chavvy a word? It is now...:ok: )

AND, may be a collectors item the way MG Rover are going...if it hasn't fallen to bits by then...:E

(And by the way, ALL daughters are someone's totty...:E)

timmcat
12th Apr 2005, 14:10
except mine......................

phoenix son
12th Apr 2005, 14:45
I take that as a polite warning TC? As it happens I'm a happily married man...

McAero
12th Apr 2005, 15:18
Nice, reliable car with a bit of poke when I need it

Not quite a family car then:E

phoenix son
12th Apr 2005, 15:45
Maybe that's WHY I needed a family car...:ooh:

Duckbutt
12th Apr 2005, 15:50
Per Ardua Ad Passat doesn't quite have the same ring to it does it.

PerArdua
12th Apr 2005, 15:54
Neither does Vorsprung durch Duckbutt :D

Windy Militant
12th Apr 2005, 16:26
phoenix son
I take that as a polite warning TC? As it happens I'm a happily married man...

Until the wife finds out about the totty spotting! :ouch: ;) ;)

Jerricho
12th Apr 2005, 17:32
they are being driven more like Saabs

......which are now just rip offs of Subarus.

Speaking of which, who wants to give me sh*t for driving an Impreza WRX?

SyllogismCheck
12th Apr 2005, 18:07
An interesting observation on Clio drivers: both my 19 and 21 year old nieces drive new-style Clios, and the 16 year old is already checking available colours for hers later this year. It is indeed a fact PP. Naturally, given the family connection, the nieces in question will fulfill the 'attractive' requirement of my observation admirably, leaving the only the part of my theory unproven that of whether they're driving Clios of the suggested colours? :p ;)

acbus1
12th Apr 2005, 18:50
.....who wants to give me sh*t for driving an Impreza WRX?
Boy racer.

Which brings us back again to Michael Jackson. :uhoh:

Onans Girlfriend
12th Apr 2005, 18:56
New mini....

car not the skirt!

Jerricho
12th Apr 2005, 19:00
Ah, now here's a difference for you.

The term "boy racer" isn't used here in the frozen north. In fact, a major percentage of the population purchase huge 4x4 trucks with 20 litre HEMI powered V8 engines that can pull a house off it's foundations, you don't get many of them on the road. I'm sure many of the locals look at it and think "What the hell is that. Bloody Jap-crap" Plus, the "boy racers" probably couldn't afford to buy, run and insure them.

Next ;)

Nereus
12th Apr 2005, 19:02
now you're getting to the real reason we drive 4x4's, to look down at all those Mini............................skirts :E

Flypro
12th Apr 2005, 19:38
nereus old chap, one looks down blouses and UP mini skirts I think you will find

Regardless of the type of motor, one should beware of 'Prats in Hats' behind the wheel.
Spotty yoof with reversed ball cap
Angry old man in cheesecutter
Femail in ANY hat:zzz:

Solid Rust Twotter
12th Apr 2005, 20:03
Twenty year old pickup truck with one of six hounds on seat next to me and biltong securely locked in glove box where he can't get it. Wet nose prints on passenger side window and windscreen, and dog hair all over interior. Papers, receipts, empty soft drink cans and a fire axe in passenger foot well as I refuse to litter, even if the vehicle looks like the wreck of the Hesperus. Wear rugby shorts, an old bush shirt and shoes if one remembers but mostly go barefoot.

Howard Hughes
12th Apr 2005, 21:06
Speaking of which, who wants to give me sh*t for driving an Impreza WRX?

Not me, cause once you drive one, you've just go to have it!!

I am a bit worried about my shrinking apendage though....

Cheers, HH.

:ok:

Jerricho
12th Apr 2005, 21:43
cause once you drive one, you've just go to have it!!

Aye. Not like them hosers that drive Evo Lancers :E

cleo
12th Apr 2005, 21:55
Guess who drives the 10th Clio!! Mind you - tis silver :hmm:

uncivilservant
12th Apr 2005, 23:18
Nissan Micra - somebody who learnt to drive in a Model T Ford but no longer feels safe driving at speeds over 25mph.

Toyota Yaris - same as Nissan Micra, but at least there are far fewer of the damn' things about.

Mercedes convertible - footballer's wife.

Old model Rover 214/216 - somebody who can't afford a Nissan Micra.

Any Japanese 4x4 - somebody with a pathological aversion to driving within three feet of mud or grass (try meeting one on a narrow country road). Oh, and usually they can't operate the brakes or release the throttle either.

B****y great 4WD tractor with huge trailer - 12 year old cider drinker.

BlueDiamond
13th Apr 2005, 05:14
Rusty ... :ok:

I used to love our old 4WD ... went anywhere and everywhere. Battle scarred, scratched and dented from numerous fishing trips and an interior that smelled like Captain Ahab's wellies but nothing ever went wrong with it. Great times. :ok:

PerArdua
13th Apr 2005, 08:35
This morning it was people with xray eyes driving in the fog and rain with no lights on at all. And the biggest 4 WD in the world with one tiny little man in!!! (napolean syndrome!!!)

The clio drivers were looking hot!!!

PA

Capt.KAOS
13th Apr 2005, 09:45
PerArdua, whoz driving a (Proton) Perodua?

http://www.regthompsoncars.co.uk/images/perodua-kelisa.jpg

PerArdua
13th Apr 2005, 09:56
That looks a pretty good car (but photos always make them look good). I could see myself in a red one but the yellow just looks silly, I know they have links to Lotus but yellow, yuck!!!

PA

I find it had to do sarcastic text!!!

answer=42
13th Apr 2005, 10:09
Porsche (any model but particularly 911):
Late middle-aged man with permed hair, UV bronze and wearing 1980s fashions.

BMW SUV: woman in 28-35 age group, too much makeup, would be goodlooking but has an unpleasant look in her eye. Will update car when divorce settlement comes through.

BMW 2WD (other than 1-series): male over 30 with one hand on steering wheel. Owns road (see other thread). Veins standing out on neck indicate need for deep breaths to avert heart attack.

Smart 4Four. Gay couple.

Mazda 121 (not the Ford Fiesta joke) with parking bumps, child seat and total mess inside. answer=42

seacue
13th Apr 2005, 11:19
In my part of suburbia USA:

Largest 4WD SUV Lexus, BMW, Mercedes:
Driven by 7-stone woman 30-35 years old talking into mobile phone. They line up outside the school to deposit / retrieve little Caitlyn or Joshua. Never a spot of mud / dirt on the vehicle.

(US translation 98 pounds, cell phone)

Dances with Boffins
13th Apr 2005, 11:32
Nissan Micra - grey-haired old dear who can't parallel park.

PerArdua
13th Apr 2005, 11:52
Nissan Micra - grey-haired old dear who can't parallel park.

Or see out the windscreen

PA

lexxity
13th Apr 2005, 12:38
Knackered Chrysler neon, but the engine still goes very well, full of dog hair from 3 hounds and silly girly toys and stuff.

But not for much longer, one has to buy family car:{ :{ ah well I'll be on Mr L's insurance soon enough so will be zooming round with me top down:} :}

as for stupid bmw 4x4's:p :p :p

ducks for incoming kosher beating;)

ORAC
13th Apr 2005, 12:43
so will be zooming round with me top down

Hope you have tinted windows.... :ooh:

All Ahead Full
13th Apr 2005, 13:04
BMW X5/Jeep Cheroke/Merc. ML/Toyota Land Crusier - Driven by rich housewife's never seen mud - who are also vertically chanllenged

Volvo/BMW/Merc/Audi Estates - driven by similar people who do not have height problems - that is people who are more then 5 1/2 feet tall

Mini drivers - again driven by estate agents, with no regard for other road users, typically wearing sunglasses

Porsche Drivers - have no friends

Kia/Peroda drivers - really should get out more

Saab drivers - frustrated pilots:D

Capt.KAOS
13th Apr 2005, 14:00
US translation 98 pounds, cell phone Vuitton bags, Prado shoes?

phoenix son
13th Apr 2005, 14:01
lexx,

will be zooming round with me top down

Remind me to keep an eye out for you as you approach EGCC in that case...:ooh:


girly toys and stuff.

Which may go some way to explaining your current "condition"...:E

answer=42
13th Apr 2005, 14:22
Ferrari Testarossa (with Bentley in garage) - John Towers.

BillHicksRules
13th Apr 2005, 14:24
Dear all,

I drive a Scenic (03 plate), have got no kids, no dogs and am only recently married.

Think it is a great car and a hoot to drive.

Cheers

BHR

woof
13th Apr 2005, 14:33
I thought the totty drove Golfs. All this time I've passed Clios and not taken a shiftly glance:(

I'm off for a drive:ok:

Dylsexlic
13th Apr 2005, 14:34
Jerricho: "huge 4x4 trucks with 20 litre HEMI powered V8 engines that can pull a house off it's foundations".......

or a cash machine out of the wall.

MadsDad
13th Apr 2005, 16:02
Ford GT40.

Been past the pits, read the P1, +4.08.5 board, just gone under the Dunlop bridge heading down towards the Esses wondering if I can save 10 yards on the braking.........

Oh, bugger. Did you have to wake me up?

Biggles Flies Undone
13th Apr 2005, 16:17
The GT40 is pretty cool, but I still think this (http://www.imca-slotracing.com/Lola%20T70%20Mk3B.htm) is the best I ever saw racing in anger :ok:

Jerricho
13th Apr 2005, 17:25
I drive a Scenic (03 plate)


Ahhh, thanks for reminding me about the whole UK "I've got the latest plate on my car, are you impressed" or "Who's gonna fork out on 100,000 quid for a personalised plate"

Takes this whole thing to a new level.

tall and tasty
13th Apr 2005, 21:53
Were I am, the roads seem to be full of Audi or Mercs.

The Audi all seem to be driven by the high class exec either males/females

The Mercs by polished business woman who seem to just glide around in them with not a care in the world.

So that almost is what I expect when one approaches me.

But when ever I see a soft top 4x4 Jeep I expect it to be driven by long leggie blond girls or tanned young toned men!

TnT

:p :cool:

uncivilservant
13th Apr 2005, 22:01
"Saab drivers - frustrated pilots"


Maybe - or people who want to survive on roads infested with nutters, but still travel with more style than a Volvo. That's my excuse, anyway.

PerArdua
14th Apr 2005, 08:40
The Mercs by polished business woman who seem to just glide around in them with not a care in the world.

So TnT you have a Merc then!!!

This mornings rant is against the people who pull out to overtake a mile before they need to...Why!!!... and don't they see the half mile queue of vehicles behind them... They always seem to be older drivers in older cars that need a good clean... And while I am ranting why do farmers drive tractors at 25mph in rush hour on already busy roads.... That's better rant over

PA

tall and tasty
14th Apr 2005, 11:24
So TnT you have a Merc then!!!

Sadly not in possession of one, but is one of my fav makes of cars and Daddy did own one

TnT

seacue
14th Apr 2005, 11:37
Capt.KAOS
quoted me:US translation 98 pounds, cell phone
and asked:
Vuitton bags, Prado shoes?

No, likely jeans and trainers/sneakers. A sense of style isn't involved when flaunting ability to borrow money to buy expensive vehicle.

GASH !
14th Apr 2005, 12:20
The TVR Sagaris must be the best way for anybody to blow 50,000.

It's also made in Blackpool - just like me. :ok:

lexxity
14th Apr 2005, 14:15
"Saab drivers - frustrated pilots"

that's frustrated fixed wing pilots of course, happen to know a heli-bopper bloke what drives a saab.

simon brown
14th Apr 2005, 18:41
The Audi all seem to be driven by the high class exec either males/females

I drive an Audi and am not an executive
I dont wear a polo neck
I dont wear designer specs
I dont play squash with my contemporaries and keep schtuum about what I do
I dont have a flat screen Bang and Olufsen TV
I dont squeeze juice in a hi tech juicer
I dont live in a contemporary million pound home
I'm not an architect
I never get the chance to drive in cloudless skies on an empty road with a supermodel by my side with 2 aryan angellic kids in the back

Its 5 years old
I'm an engineer
I need a car that is well built and lasts and that is nicely designed and appointed
and whats more I pick my nose, fart and am a Newcastle United supporter
:ok:

Helli-Gurl
14th Apr 2005, 21:50
I drive a Clio

x

Stockpicker
14th Apr 2005, 22:25
Loved your post, simon , but I have to ask - did you buy your car two years ago from an architect with a gorgeous wife??

:} :E

PerArdua
15th Apr 2005, 08:38
Stockpicker

Loved your post, simon , but I have to ask - did you buy your car two years ago from an architect with a gorgeous wife??

Are you the gorgeous wife you refer to who sold the audi to the farting nose picker!!!

PA

Lon More
15th Apr 2005, 11:46
An Engerland Supporter? (http://www.sniffpetrol.com/AdFlags.jpg)

B Fraser
15th Apr 2005, 22:13
2 Porkers (one water-cooled and the other air-cooled) :cool: and a beat up old Honda for leaving at the station carpark !

Women don't look at me when I'm in the Honda

:{