View Full Version : G Spot

6th Apr 2005, 23:06
Jerricho mentioned it in his alphabet on another thread...........

Does the G spot exist? What is it and can anyone find it?

Answers on a postcard please ...... no more than 15 words :E

6th Apr 2005, 23:19
Ah the Grafenberg Spot (sp?)... I fecking well hope it exists, I nearly lost my hand searching for it, once upon a female many moons ago.

She claimed I found it anyway. :E

Who's betting the guys believe it exists and the women don't??!

Loose rivets
6th Apr 2005, 23:26
Mmm. I'll ask my sister in law.

Some years ago she wrote a huge, rather serious tome on the subject. From what I remember of the draft, she is of the opinion that it most definitely does. In fact, the book seems to put it at the centre of the sexual universe. :O

6th Apr 2005, 23:30
A major drug company has test marketed a female version of Viagara. Tenatively called Niagara, it goes direct to the G-spot. :E

Onan the Clumsy
6th Apr 2005, 23:37

6th Apr 2005, 23:39
Oh come on Onan .............. ?? :=

6th Apr 2005, 23:40
Only men who can't pleasure a woman properly believe in the G-spot. Those who can don't need any mysterious magic buttons. ;)

tall and tasty
6th Apr 2005, 23:50
The G-spot, apparently you have not lived until someone has hit the E-spot according to the lastest survey.

It is unforgettable or so they say.

But I have not come across any one who can hit either!!

TnT ;)

6th Apr 2005, 23:54
What is the E Spot when it's at home?? :confused:

Solid Rust Twotter
6th Apr 2005, 23:55
... a small green thing with a lump on the end ...

7th Apr 2005, 00:00
They were gonna call it "Thar she blows!"

16 blades
7th Apr 2005, 00:03
The true swordsman has many techniques in his repartee. I've yet to find this 'E-spot' though.

I have to say I have found the magic 'G' on every lucky lady that's had my pleasure (ok then, both of them!)- but it's not always in the same place for different women. Explore, listen, feel reactions - has not failed yet.


Solid Rust Twotter
7th Apr 2005, 00:04

It's usually best to fake sensitivity if yer want yer socks washed.:E :ok:

Solid Rust Twotter
7th Apr 2005, 00:07
Then ye'll have to find the Q spot, Cap'n Ahab....

7th Apr 2005, 00:07
I didn't say could any MAN find it - I said could 'anyone' find it!!

Man, woman, chimpanzee - doesn't matter.

(No sorry ....... that's not allowed is it?! :} )

The big question is: do you believe it exists and have you ever found it?

7th Apr 2005, 00:10
Ermm ... yes :\ But modesty prevents me from going into further detail.

7th Apr 2005, 00:33
Only men who can't pleasure a woman properly believe in the G-spot. Those who can don't need any mysterious magic buttons.

THAT IS SO TRUE, but its still fun trying to find it with your partner, but ive been unsussesful to find it.

7th Apr 2005, 00:38
OH that was the problem, no wonder it was a bit dusty....

7th Apr 2005, 00:56
A major drug company has test marketed a female version of Viagara. Tenatively called Niagara, it goes direct to the G-spot. If the marketing effort seems to be focused on the drug's effect on the G-spot, it seems the name has missed the mark. Why on earth didn't they call it G-agra?

Never mind...one is off to the Patent and Trademark office first thing... :cool:

7th Apr 2005, 01:08
Apparently there's a male equivalent, located in a somewhat 'difficult to access' location.

How the hell she knew about it was beyond me. What she attempted to do I won't even begin to describe. My response began with 'no' and ended with 'chance.'

7th Apr 2005, 01:47
OK. You can all stop looking now; I already found it.

...but I'm keeping it for myself - its far too much fun to let just anyone play with it. ;)

Onan the Clumsy
7th Apr 2005, 03:26
Ah SmilingKnifed, sounds like you're talking about a little perineal action :ok:

I understand the Japs - erm I mean the Japanese use the technique, often with a perineal harness involving half a golf ball.

It can give you a heart attack though, but on the other hand...what's the problem with that? :E

See, I knew reading the articles would come in handy some day. I only hope that wasn't in the April issue :}

7th Apr 2005, 03:29
It's all well and good telling me this now Onan!

A warning of the impending from her wouldn't have gone amiss either.

7th Apr 2005, 03:34
As the great Sir Les Patterson once said, "I'll put a bit of chewing gum on the end of me knob and when you start chewing I'll stop pushing."

Presumably he went straight past the G, E, and F spots!

7th Apr 2005, 03:50
Speaking of perineal..you were speaking of perineal, no?
I've heard that part of the anatomy called the 'now.' You've all heard the old song "I Wonder Who's Kissing Her Now?"

7th Apr 2005, 05:28
A friend of mine in Bangkok once showed me that trick. Even though she's a tad past her prime these days, she can be found hanging out at the Bamboo House.

I think its the Harley Davidson motor cycles that attract her. They're a bit like those harnesses that Onan mentioned, are Harley Davidsons...

B Fraser
7th Apr 2005, 06:43
I wanted to register a balloon as G-SPOT as the retrieve crew would always spend hours looking for it. G-SPOT would be eventually found in the most inaccessible place :} (usually to the North of Biffin's Bridge) :E

The real G-SPOT was a Partenavia P68 that was written off :bored: I wonder if it skidded off a wet runway :E

Orange Arm Waver
7th Apr 2005, 07:48
I've had no trouble finding it...
As 16 Blades says...

Explore, listen, feel reactions - has not failed yet.

Take the time to please the woman you are with...

tall and tasty
7th Apr 2005, 09:20
Tart 1

Sorry I did not explain it did I :p

The E-spot or [email protected] is an "emotional [email protected]"

Apparently the most powerful sex organ is the brain and signs it has been sparked include:

(1)He never has to ask if it was good for you
(2)you forget your own name in the first 5 mins but never his
(3)more than waves of pleasure go through you
(4)you will want to lie in his arms til dawn or longer
(5)The next day you don't talk about it - it is far to intimate

Would be interesting if any one has ever had one but then no one would talk about it anyway (maybe that is why it is only in journals)


7th Apr 2005, 09:21
Tip for left handed pilots.

Take the damn watch off first

7th Apr 2005, 09:49
I know all about the Z spot - when you start to get near it, she goes ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Orange Arm Waver
7th Apr 2005, 10:05
Not wishing to seem smug but the woman in my life has those...

I also agree the brain is indeed a powerful tool - sugguestion works well too - Only draw back is that it puts her off her work!

She's said it's a good job we live so far apart...:E

7th Apr 2005, 11:21
What some men say about the G spot:

"I can't quite put my finger on it ......... but it's on the tip of my tongue."


Orange Arm Waver
7th Apr 2005, 11:50
:D :E
Very good I like that...;)

7th Apr 2005, 12:03
I always thought a G spot was one of those black bits on the sun?

7th Apr 2005, 16:13
Speaking as a man......



7th Apr 2005, 16:31
Geeze, that too to page three for that response.

You guys are slipping.

7th Apr 2005, 17:25
I see the responses have run the usual gamut of male reaction from idle curiosity, through banter rough to smooth, and reactions from amusement to amazement. Having myself searched for this chimerical phenomena and convinced myself that it may even exist from some hearteningly active responses while doing so, I feel sure that the time taken searching for is definitely never wasted, if nothing else it passes the time in an interesting enough fashion.

Funnily enough during one of the more outrageous of the Vanessa Feltz TV plastic surgery programs some time back there was an 'in depth' fly on the wall documentary of the surgical enhancement of just such a place. The surgeon, a chap of impeccable manners and charm, first established the location of said spot, then shot some collogen into it to enhance and raise it's profile. The efficacy of the treatment the young lady in question was later able to gushingly endorse, one imagines in more ways than one.

Can't help feeling that when one loses interest in the search for better perfomance one has to start getting slightly concerned.:uhoh:

Darth Nigel
7th Apr 2005, 17:37
one can only imagine, if it is such a sensitive spot, what the injection of collagen felt like.

Heck, I'm a bloke, and I'm sitting here puckered up at the thought :{

7th Apr 2005, 17:48
Presumably one simply clenched down hard and thought of all the pleasure to come???:\

7th Apr 2005, 19:51
I found it once, then I lost it, then I found it again, then I lost it, then I found it again, then I lost it, then I told her to keep still.

7th Apr 2005, 21:15
1. Does it exist? Model specific; yes/maybe/no.

2. What is it? You'll know if you find it.

3. Can anyone find it? Yes, dependent on Q1.

Not on a postcard but in 15 words as requested. That number, thankfully, being too few for me to get myself in trouble. :ok: :E

Solid Rust Twotter
7th Apr 2005, 21:25
Reckon her indoors lunging for that during the vinegar strokes should make one backpedal up the light fittings. :E

7th Apr 2005, 21:25
No jokes about the waste gate please Scrubbed.

(Sorry, geeky pilot banter!)

7th Apr 2005, 21:34
It's all a dastardly female plot. We blokes used to have a great deal of trouble finding the clitoris, so much so that I assumed that there was only one in the whole world and you girlies had to take turns with it. But no. All of a sudden Robert Winston or some other TV medic shows us a picture and BANG - straight to it, no problemo, even with the light off...

So now your clitorises (clitori??) are taking a battering you tell us that, well, it is all very well and good but the holy grail of orgasmic switches is something called the G spot. Compared to the G spot, the clitoris is a bleeding doddle to locate. You hide it well out of the way of prying eyes. And prying fingers, tongues, willies etc...

No doubt someone will come up with a sure-fire way of locating it and no doubt you will tell us that there is another even less accessible button to press hidden away in the small intestine that only be accessed with major surgery. :confused:

8th Apr 2005, 16:39
Depends if she takes it up the council.....

8th Apr 2005, 17:19
Hey, I never knew what a clitoris was until one was pointed out at me. OK, it was a very long time ago and I hadn't quite got round to mustering up the courage to walk into a bookshop and buy The Joy of Love. :O

8th Apr 2005, 17:20
I wonder what "Onan's Girlfriend" has to say about it all. Welcome to the party.

Onans Girlfriend
8th Apr 2005, 17:28
Thank you for my welcome, I'm not sure what to say yet, I'm too much of a Lady you understand

Windy Militant
8th Apr 2005, 20:35
Orange Arm Waver mentioned a few eons ago

Take the time to please the woman you are with...

That's all well and good, but by the time you've laid a new patio, retiled the bathroom, fitted a new kitchen and redecorated the lounge, your too bloody [email protected] to find anything! :zzz: :zzz: :zzz:

8th Apr 2005, 20:54
I think there was a previous thread on this where Whirly"G"ig said something about finding a sweet spot on a five string banjo -was that it? :E

8th Apr 2005, 20:55
clitorises ( clitori?)

Clitores I should think if it's a Latin noun of the third declension.

8th Apr 2005, 20:59
a sweet spot on a five string banjo -was that it?

Just because I have a 5-string banjo doesn't mean I know how to make beautiful music with it!

.... is this getting a bit euphemistic?



8th Apr 2005, 21:30

Just because I have a 5-string banjo doesn't mean I know how to make beautiful music with it!<

Same with us blokes, same with us blokes.... :p

9th Apr 2005, 13:05
I guess I must be pretty backward.

I never managed to find the clitoris until I got to secondary school:}

9th Apr 2005, 21:15
Great replies, guys! :D

Funny though how a certain person who seemed to have quite a bit to say on the subject has scrubbed his posts!

(Or had them scrubbed for him maybe?) :}

9th Apr 2005, 21:18
Must have had auto-scrub engaged; wasn't us.

9th Apr 2005, 23:47
A right old scrubber? :p

Ooh, sorry - no offence meant to anyone, especially a moderatrix! :O

10th Apr 2005, 10:39
Sometimes the joy of the thing is in the passage. Sometimes it is in the arrival.

For a while, one day, I foundered in the darkness without an adequate signal to commence the final approach.

Then I found my bearings, spotted the beacon through furry clouds, turned to the proper course and slid down the glideslope to the inner marker, from whence a successful arrival was assured.

A bit bumpy on the rollout, but full reverse thrust brought a fairly quick stop to the day's adventure.

10th Apr 2005, 15:28
I always thought the way to a woman's G-spot was through the wallet...

10th Apr 2005, 16:27
There are some seriously weird people on this thread.

What kind of unnatural urges prompted Arcniz to bring aviation into this???:confused:

10th Apr 2005, 22:25
She told me "diddle the middle"

I said doodle the whoddle?

She said "push in, press up and wiggle a little."

I said "this aint no fiddle."

And why are you talking in riddles?

She said "if you licked it while you did it I would blow like a Missile."

I said "O....k...., I get you"

you want me to press it right here?

She said "Yea..... right over there.

And move it like this?

She said "OH! YES! That's how you do it!

Then I started slobbin and gruntin and gettin into it.

She said "Now put your other hand on the top and press down till it touches".

I said "Shit, I don't use this many fingers rolling my dutches."

She said "Hushit and do it and don't stop till I say."

I said "I'm tryin but I'm gettin tired and my tongues in the way.


I thought "I guess if I stopped now my ass would be toast."

So I diddled the middle

Wiggled a little

Licked it and flicked it

and played it like a fiddle.

I pressed on the top

And I damn sure didn't stop

Even though I was tired and sweating

cuz the room was getting hot.

And just when I thought my knuckles would pop

my tongue was gonna drop

And I glanced at the clock

She screamed like a demon


I didn't,

she didn't

and then I thought I was dreamin

10th Apr 2005, 22:42
Did you mean to miss out the last line there Kaos? ;) :E

13th Apr 2005, 07:38
Perhaps we should leave the last word to the Hormel Girls.

Back in the early fifties when sex had only just been discovered (playing in a Rock 'n Roll band) the Hormel Girls performing troupe had a national weekly radio show. They proclaimed,

''Cold or hot, SPAM hits the spot!''

(So that's yet another pet name for it.)

13th Apr 2005, 09:25
but full reverse thrust brought a fairly quick stop to the day's adventure.

Never a truer word was said.There's nothing worse than thrusting away and letting one rip...does tend to put the mockers on the event.:hmm:

13th Apr 2005, 09:30
Did you mean to miss out the last line there Kaos?yeah SC, but on this forum it would read like:

I was **** her **** and after we **** we **** and ****

So, nothing really missed out here.

13th Apr 2005, 10:02
Ah, I had a much simpler one in mind, something rhyming with 'dreaming'. :ok:

13th Apr 2005, 10:57
You guessed right SC ;)

13th Apr 2005, 20:24
Whoever mentioned wallet forgot to mention the neccessary G notes contained within

Darth Nigel
13th Apr 2005, 20:38
There are mechanical devices capable of producing a sense of sexual satisfaction in women.

A good example is the Mercedes SLK 350 Roadster :ok:

Incipient Sinner
13th Apr 2005, 21:15
Capt, give us a clue or three on your last line. I just don't have the imagination required.

13th Apr 2005, 21:21
A cryptic (for JB at least ;) ) clue as to the pivotal word of the line: The oriental vase lay beyond the brook. :confused: :rolleyes:

Of course that's only what my mind imagined the last line may be. I can think of many other suitable words, but my line had a nice fluidity to it. :E

tall and tasty
13th Apr 2005, 21:39
capable of producing a sense of sexual satisfaction in women. A good example is the Mercedes SLK 350 Roadster

Darth Nigel

mmmmmmmmm now you are talking

TnT :p

13th Apr 2005, 21:41
What's the difference between your G-spot and a pub???

..........a man can find a pub :p ;) :ok:

14th Apr 2005, 11:05
Dear Sinner,

well trying again, this time the expurgated version:

I was massaging her back and after we watched the late news we spooned up and fell asleep. :zzz: :zzz: :zzz: