View Full Version : Accidents with Contact lenses

Jelly Baby Freak
30th Mar 2005, 09:31
Don't wear them myself, but my mate John (I'll call him that, 'cos that's his name) was on an Easter weekend away with his wife, Tina.
Having consumed much alcohol during the course of the evening, he realised that he would probably have a hum dinger of
a hangover in the morning.
So, he goes into the bathroom, sees two glasses of water and downs one before retiring to bed. Unbeknown to him, Tina had forgotten her contact lens pot, and next morning, she spots that one of her contact lenses is missing.
It's at this point that John realises he must have drunk her contact lens!
Still, as Tina said, he could always talk out of his a*$e, now he should be able to see out of it as well!


henry crun
30th Mar 2005, 09:58
That is similar to the story about the retired colonel who had a glass eye.
He always took it out at night and put it in a glass of water by his bedside.

Inevitably one night he woke up thirsty and took a gulp from the glass, and before he realised what he had done he swallowed the glass eye.

Next morning when his butler woke him he related what he had done in the night and said "Jeeves old chap, have a look down me throat and tell me if you can see it"

Jeeves has a look but to no avail, so the colonel said "well it must be down there somewhere, have a look at the other end"

Jeeves did as his master requested and then said "I am sorry sir, I still cannot see it".
"That is strange" said the colonel "I can see you quite clearly". :D

30th Mar 2005, 10:31
A friend who became a doctor did a spell in a casualty ward of a Cornwall hospital. One day, a guy came in complaining that he had bvm pains. When examined, my friend saw a glass eye staring at him from out of the guys Wring . Apparently the guy never explained how or why, but just took it away with him post extraction

30th Mar 2005, 11:55
Ex Kent CCC captain / wicket keeper once did this with fellow Kent player Graham Cowdrey's contacts.

Cowdrey was showering before the match, sans contact lenses, and Marshy took a swig of water, to find he's swallowed them.

Cowdrey started the match late, as he couldn't play without lenses and didn't have glasses with him :)

After a heavy night the night before, I once put a lense in with a chunk of it missing - bloody hell it hurt. Had to drive home with one lense only - interesting.


30th Mar 2005, 12:01
I've ripped my contact lens in half trying to take them out, now thats a very silly thing to do, it'll take you about 5hours to fish the two halves out.

30th Mar 2005, 12:02
Have put a lens straight into my eye out of it's strong cleaning solution before. That's horrible, was red for days.

The worst stories I've heard from others seem to revolve around situations where one has dropped a lens but not noticed, and, convinced it's still attached to the eye, scrabbled around at one's eyeball trying to pull off the (non-present) lens. Quite a bit of damage can ensue if the individual is drunk enough not to feel pain.

Ick. I stopped wearing them some time ago.

30th Mar 2005, 12:26
Recall well standing in the middle of the busiest intersection of the local supermarker shouting 'stay away!!!' at people while MadsMum was grovelling on the floor looking for a lost contact (was years ago and the things were bloody expensive then).

Also watching female friend delving into the eyes of another (female friend that is) who had managed to put BOTH contacts into the same eye.

30th Mar 2005, 12:38
I have a friend who wears contact lenses and she seems to have no end of trouble with them. It has put me off ever considering them for myself.

The worst thing was when she wasn't sure if she had got one of them out or not (after a long and thirsty evening) and she went to bed. Next day she had a really sore eye and it turned out that she'd pushed the lens up under her eyelid and around a bit and got stuck. She had to go and have it dug out :yuk: :yuk:

30th Mar 2005, 14:53
Had an experience a few years ago when I was delivering/collecting aircraft from a remote station (ranch) in Western Australia. Delivered one, and was due to take the other out early the next morning. Stayed overnight at the station and was billeted on a bed out on the verandah (it's a heck of a lot cooler out there). Took my lenses out and thought no more about it until I got up pre-dawn and found that one of them wasn't in the case where it should have been. Spent quite a while scrabbling around on the floor looking for it but to no avail.

Didn't have the spare pair of specs with me (as per aviation rules) - so what to do??

Answer - fly one eyed!! After a while the brain gets used to it and it didn't seem too much of a problem. But I always keep the spare pair of specs in my nav bag now!

30th Mar 2005, 15:31
Having a laser burn yer lens back into shape is all the rage over here. Now tell me, why would anyone not in danger of losing an eye let a bloke point a laser directly into their eye on purpose?

Then go back the next week and let them do it to t'other one? I'll keep me glasses thank you.


30th Mar 2005, 16:54
I've always thought the same myself.

I can't imagine the first night's sleep after the op is much fun. Wondering if when you wake up, you will find that you are one of the 2% - 5% of people who suffer side effects.

Solid Rust Twotter
30th Mar 2005, 18:02
A story of a military chap in a sauna who dumped a lot of water on the brazier and tried to stay in as long as possible. Apparently his contacts got fried and he was effectively blind for a few hours...:ooh:

Ranger 1
30th Mar 2005, 18:27
I had a bit of a disaster on the start of my holiday once, I ended up getting stranded on JER instead of GCI due to being diverted from BRS to Ext due to weather,earlier in the day & missing the connecting flight, as I was about to go to bed, I stood over the sink rinsing my lens & it went down the plug hole, not being beaten I dismantled the plumbing under the basin removed the small bowl trap & tipped it into the bath & started the grim process of sifting through the remains of shaving bristle hair etc to recover it:yuk:
Another little incident occured many years ago I got up early in the morning & being the worst for wear from the night before, I forgot I had left my lens on the dressing table on some tissue paper, I had a quick shave & picked up the aftershave bottle placed it straight down bang on top of them, only one of them survived, the only thing was did not know if it was the left or right one :{ so it was a long trip to the Opticians

Useful tip, if you lose a lens on the floor use a bright flashlight to search for it, the lens will show up easier, the main thing is to watch where you step, if someone is at hand call then to hand you the flash light from a distance, done this countless times, I have done this for pax on aircraft before it works a treat:ok:

Noah Zark.
30th Mar 2005, 19:34
I remember quite a few years ago reading in a safety leaflet of a guy with contact lenses who went into a welding shop for whatever, and was in there for a while. When he went to remove his lenses, the welding arc (or the ultra-violent part of it) that had been flashing around the workshop he'd been in had apparently evaporated the thin layer of fluid twixt lens and eyeball (cornea?) and fused the two together, with very tragic results.

30th Mar 2005, 22:28
2 stories.

1. I once, after a heavy night out, forgot to remove my lenses before the ale sent me to sleep, I woke up the next morning and spent the first 30 minutes of that day thinking that my short sight was cured, but also thinking I had a something irritating in both eyes.

2. A mate was wearing his lenses whilst playing rugby, he got his eye gouged by a particularly unpleasant opponent. he lost his lens in that eye, and his eye was sore, but he thought the pain would wear off. Two days later the pain was as bad as ever, so he went to the doctor who examined his eye and eventually found that the "missing lens" had been pushed to the rear of his eye socket, and nature had taken its course by partially forming a web of skin over the lens to protect the eye from contamination.
he had the operation to remove it under local anesthetic and also had the lens framed as a reminder to be a bit more thorough...

Atlas Shrugged
30th Mar 2005, 23:37

31st Mar 2005, 04:00
Hey there Blue-eyes! Whatcha doin tonight then?

Loose rivets
31st Mar 2005, 06:13
A friend who became a doctor did a spell in a casualty ward of a Cornwall hospital. One day, a guy came in complaining that he had bvm pains. When examined, my friend saw a glass eye staring at him from out of the guys Wring .


The next line from the doctor, is I think, "look old chap, you've got to trust me!!"

henry crun
31st Mar 2005, 07:26
Enroute from Honolulu to San Francisco we were approaching top of descent so I went to the toilet to insert the contacts.
I had not had them long and need a mirror to do it.

Dropped one on the floor, bugger !

By the time I had found it, sterilised it, and got it in there was a thump as we touched down and the brakes and reverse thrust were engaged.

I waited until we were obviously taxing in and then left the toilet to be greeted by a white faced FA who said "Have you been in there all the time during landing ? ".
"Yes" said I, "but if you keep quiet about it so will I" :)