View Full Version : Such Things as Dreams are Made of...

14th Mar 2005, 11:45
Independent: So, is there more to men than sex and cars? Dream on

They are, says Shakespeare, the "children of idle brains" and have fascinated and baffled since the dawn of mankind.

Now scientists have thrown new light on the surreal world of dreams in men and women - and have found the genders differ markedly in their dreams, and dream to type.

Women, for example, have more emotion in their dreams and dream about food, clothing and personal appearance.

Men, on the other hand, dream about other men, violence, sex, cars and weapons........

Those damn*d stereotypes. :O

14th Mar 2005, 11:47
Men, on the other hand, dream about other men, violence, sex, cars and weapons........


tall and tasty
14th Mar 2005, 12:27
Women, for example, have more emotion in their dreams and dream about food, clothing and personal appearance.

Maybe I am doing it all wrong then!!!! These rarely feature in any dream I have but on the other hand I could not post any of my dreams :E

Men, on the other hand, dream about other men, violence, sex, cars and weapons........

Men dream of other men???

Think the s£x and cars is high on the list

But I will probably be put in my place very quickly

TnT :p ;)

Onan the Clumsy
14th Mar 2005, 12:37
I had a dream last night:

I was walking down the road in a beautiful Summer weight dark blue Mani suit with a white shirt and a very colourful, yet tasteful tie.

I was feeling really good about things, the day was clear and mild, I was heading to lunch with a mate of mine when I felt my new Cole Haan loafer slide through a big pile of dogshit.

I was instantly furious, I'd spent ages coordinating that outfit and now I had to change the shoes which meant changing everything. I had to go back to my lambourghini and race through the streets to my city loft where I noticed the neighbour's window was broken.

I looked inside and saw her being attacked by a strongly built man, so I reached under my carefully tailored armpit and whipped out my Walther 380 and put a couple of rounds in the back of his head.

She was naked by then, so I averted my eyes, but she ran to me and smothered me with kisses. I had always felt a sense of unrequited yearning around her and one thing led to another and I ended up missing the lunch date.

14th Mar 2005, 13:49
So Mr Clumsy, that's very interesting, very interesting... does stepping in dogshit often feature in your dreams?

14th Mar 2005, 14:32
I struggled to come to grips with the fact that I had been assaulted, shot no less, by a Lamborghini driver, as I gave my supermodel girlfriend the treatment she deserved. This idiot mistook her cries of ecstacy for distress. Pretentious [email protected], I thought, as I lay on the floor collecting my thoughts, ignoring the pain from the two .380 rounds behind my ear. What is it about Lambo drivers?

I had a quick mental glimpse, which I decided I would prolong for a little while, of the time I had thrown my Lancia Fulvia sideways in front of an Espada, causing the portly balding middle-aged boulevard poseur with the obligatory blonde yawning in the passenger seat to foul his diaper and disappear on to the footpath, looking even more of a loser.

His passenger stopped yawning immediately, her eyes locked on mine. As she stooped low to slide into the passenger seat of the Lancia, she made no attempt to hide the fact that under her short skirt...but I digress.

This businessman, (the one who shot me, not the old fart who ran into the rose garden) had acquired his Lamborghini by calling it a tax writeoff at the expense of his loyal shareholders (like myself, but more of that later). Little did he know that I had been hired by a group of disgruntled shareholders to bring my considerable skills into play. I noticed in the reflection on the window that he was attempting in his own clumsy way to take advantage of Elle.. (whoops, sorry, I promised I would be discreet)........ of my amour for that night.

The Schmeisser I carried in my hip pocket, thanks to the latest "just add water" technology (I had to be very careful of swimming pools) made sure that he was never going to make his lunch date.

Never mind. I'm sure nobody would miss him. A Lamborghini hitting the ocean after being launched self-propelled from a cliff at high speed makes just the sort of satisfying "sklooch" sound you would expect as it disappears forever.

I turned to Elle, lit two Senior Service and gave her one. Then I gave her another one. Whoops, sorry, I got distracted again. never mind, the editor will bleep those out.
Um, where was I?

"Come, darling," I shaid, "I musht get to a chemisht for a painkiller. I have a slight headache. I'll drive, my shweet.."

Aww, mum, do I really have to go to bed? :8

15th Mar 2005, 01:37
Jeez, Onan, reading too much Bret Easton Ellis late at night....?

15th Mar 2005, 07:29
I always have wierd dreams. They make sense, but they're just odd. For example, a couple of nights ago I dreamt I was a detective and had solved some murders. It was a little old lady bashing people on the head with a frying pan as they came up through this tunnel. Turns out they were her friends & had sleeping problems; she thought she could help. Another one from last week was about a battle. My dream centred on some 'goodies' in a tunneling machine and some 'badies' with this giant worm thing. The worm thing attacked the tunneling machine, but the Queen, who happened to be travelling in the tunneling machine, managed to escape. She ran in zig-zags up this hill to a wooden house on stilts and hid under the staircase. Then I woke up. :confused:

Maude Charlee
15th Mar 2005, 11:29
I usually end up dying in mine. Rather strange as apparently this isn't supposed to happen.

Sorry, must dash. There's a tall chap with a scythe at the door.

15th Mar 2005, 13:50
Recurrent dream: One of me pudicats runs out the front door. She is just across the road. Then someone opens the door and lets me other pudicat out. I get hold of this one and then set off in chase of the other. I suddenly find myself in some strange community where everyone lives in very dilapidated buildings. And they have a lot of cats. But they let me in (no doors anyway) and I look for my moggy amongst all their moggies. But she's never one of them!

Unusual dream: I was protecting someone. We were in a big office building with glass corridors. My legs refused to run fast enough. We were cornered. I drew my pistol as I heard the assailant's footsteps approach. It wasn't a gun, I don't know what it was, I was confused because I thought I was armed. He shot me with a shotgun through the glass. I was hit but felt no pain. I remember him coming into the room and pointing the gun at me again, after which everything goes blank.

Last night's dream: My boss paid me a lot of money to go away. "Where will you go?" he asked me. I replied "I'm not sure, I could go back to the UK but then my cats would have to spend 6 months in quarantine...". But I was thinking to myself, now that I have lots of money, why not just stay here on the Côte d'Azur?! :O