Southern Hemisphere Operators Sue Helicopter Manufactures.

[Dave_Jackson]

Reuters: November 31, 2004


Many of the helicopter users in the Southern Hemisphere have joined in a lawsuit against the manufactures. They contend that the manufactures have shown a bias toward the purchasers in the Northern Hemisphere.

The suit was brought about after the conclusion of a ten million-dollar research project by Professor I. M. Bidet was made public. His field of research is 'rotorcraft swirl recovery'. This is a little known field about the rotational velocity of a helicopter's induced velocity. Swirl recovery represents the elimination of an energy loss that accounts for an increase in the induced power of 2% to 3%.

During an interview, the enema professor said that the idea for this research project came to him while standing in front of a toilet twiddling his thumbs. It started as an in-depth study of toilets and other drains around the world. From this, he discovered that water rotated CW in the Northern Hemisphere and CCW in the Southern Hemisphere. He then equated the draining of water to the downwash of a helicopter rotor and discovered that CCW rotating rotors have an efficiency advantage when they are operating in the Northern Hemisphere and a disadvantage when operating in the Southern Hemisphere. He felt that this CCW rotor rotation was biased against the companies in the lower half of the planet.

The southern helicopter companies are suing to force all manufactures produce both CCW and CW rotors in the future. It is reported that Sikorsky is hoping to negate the suit by producing all future rotorcraft with two main rotors. One will turn CCW and the other will turn CW.


Perhaps Nick can provide some additional information. ;)

[SASless]

Now lets see here....If I am hovering a tandem rotor helicopter...exactly at the equator....would I get more lift with a north or south heading....and would it have to be based upon true north or magnetic north? To ensure accrucacy....would I have to use a Lambert Conformal Projection....or Transvere Mercator map when measuring the variance angle? Now....if the forward head rotates USA fashion...and the aft head....French or Russian fashion....and assuming the tradewinds have abated to nil....would the rotational speed of the rotorwash be increased by the rotation of the earth on its out of plumb axis (assuming we are not at the pear shaped bulge portion of the globe)?
:ok:

[Heli-Ice]

Well... this professor must be very intelligent since he finds out that toilets and helicopters share similarities. :p

Now we have something new to think about both in the cockpit and on the Potty.

But, what do helicopters and toilets have in common?

[PPRuNe Radar]

Maybe this thread is right then ?? ;)

Oz Whingers (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=152565)

[NickLappos]

Dave has hit on two specific scientific principles with the report that he dug up.

First, the concept of coriolis force as the explanation for all things unpredictable in helicopter aerodynamics, especially south of the equator.

Second is the ability to quote news reports not yet written.

For both, Dave deserves an Ig-Nobel Prize!!

[Phoenix Rising]

Hey what about the Kmax, doesnt it have one set of blades going in each direction. Thats probably why it does so well on the fires downunder each year. :ok:

:E

[Dave_Jackson]

SASless;

All the answers to your questions are in the report. Unfortunately, the Australians have given the report their highest classification ~ 'Humongous Top Secret'.


Nick sez,

" For both, Dave deserves an Ig-Nobel Prize!!"

Dave askz,

The Nobel Prize comes with money attached. How much is an 'Ig' worth?

:O

[Lu Zuckerman]

To: Heli-Ice


Now we have something new to think about both in the cockpit and on the lu.

You have a choice: Loo, John, Crapper, Bog, Toilet, Head or, even Potty. If you want to call it a lu at least you could capitalize the word.

Signed Loo Zuckerman

:E :E

[sprocket]

DJ Wrote:

He felt that this CCW rotor rotation was biased against the companies in the lower half of the planet.

Perhaps thats why the Oz military have gone to the French for new helicopters. That'll keep us flush with the northern hemispherians.


What comes around, goes around.

;)

[Nigerian Expat Outlaw]

This subject plumbs the depths of ones intra lavatory thinking processes. The mind swirls (in a CW direction) with coloured images (mainly pale yellow) of bloated bladders emptying over flaming areas with blades going in all directions before disappearing down the tubes. A watery subject that needs to be splashed across the front pages.

The result will surely appear down the line in time...........:ok:

[Thud_and_Blunder]

How can I usefully work the phrase "dunny-unda" into this thread?

[SASless]

"Unda"....but you are pointing up from our perspective....and from the reproductive sense....would it be a recommended procedure for you to use the woman superior method to prevent....hang on here....either way you are in a no win situation there!;)

[Lu Zuckerman]

This whole argument would be mooted if you try to determine which way the water (toilet fluid-blue) rotates in a vacuum toilet such as those used on a Boeing aircraft. Can the fluid start to rotate just as the flapper opens or is it accelerated so fast that it sublimates in the vacuum?


:confused: :E :E :uhoh:

[CyclicWaggle]

I had to think very carefully about which way round I needed to stir my tea after changing hemispheres. You need to offset the corriolis force to ensure the milk mixes in properly :ok:

[Heli-Ice]

Dear Mr. Zuckerman.

I'm sorry about my post.

I am Icelandic so my Ingelese is not so very good sometimes. I didn't intend to offend you and I will edit my post immediately. :O

Heli-Ice

[Lu Zuckerman]

To: Heli-Ice

I had no intention of making a correction in either your spelling and / or English skills. It was a means of adding to the (Humor?) in a thread initiated by Dave Jackson.

Dave as you may know is a disc jockey on radio station CLIT in Prince George, BC. His program is humor based and he broadcasts during the busy hours of 6 AM to 10.00 AM talking mainly to drivers on their way to work. Since Prince George is snowed in most of the winter Dave has a lot of time on his hands thinking of new ways to outsmart NickLappos and other members of this forum. When he isn’t thinking about helicopter engineering he thinks of ways of connecting humor to helicopters hence, this thread. He also spends a lot of time sitting on the toilet also thinking about helicopters and the relationship between the two.

:E :E

[Dave_Jackson]

Too da Loo


You're giving the members of this forum a snow job. The person who you so glibly refer to as Dave_Jackson doesn't exist. This is a pseudonym for a person whose was baptized as Mr. X.

Mr. X got his name when the delivering doctor put an 'X' beside the place on his birth certificate where the mother was to put in the name of her new baby. Well the mother, in her excitement, forgot to fill in the name. But I digress .........

Don't tell anybody, but Mr. X is actually an undercover agent in the UN Department of Covert Operations & Goodwill. He has the near impossible job of finding and then punishing the most active terrorist in the world, the reviled Dr. Who Ever.

You can get some appreciation of Mr. X's workload, when every day you hear of a terrorist act and the offended leader says "Who Ever is responsible. Will be punished."


Heliport ~ Is this posting too political? :uhoh:

[SASless]

Did Mr X have a sibling named Malcolm (aka Red)?