View Full Version : Philosophy

18th Nov 2004, 16:00
Today is 'National Philosophy Day'.

Everyone should believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink'

Further thoughts?

(Anyone quoting from the Philosophers Song from Monty Python gets 2 demerits and a half-hour detention next Wednesday, which is why I left Descartes out of it).

tall and tasty
18th Nov 2004, 16:02
Believe in oneself


18th Nov 2004, 16:05
Against all the evidence of past experience?

Biggles Flies Undone
18th Nov 2004, 16:07
It is better to seek forgiveness
Than ask permission

18th Nov 2004, 16:09
If you are 5 minutes past a bollocking, you may as well be an hour....

18th Nov 2004, 16:11
Why waste time examining your navel when close examination of your partner's navel can be so much more rewarding?

18th Nov 2004, 16:12
All flowerpots have a hole in their bottom.
I have a hole in my bottom.
I am a flowerpot! :8

18th Nov 2004, 16:16
Philo: Having a strong affinity or preference for; loving

sophy: Sophie

:E :ok:

Shorty Final
18th Nov 2004, 16:55
is that why mr Gaarder called his famous philosofy book Sophie's World you think? :)


tony draper
18th Nov 2004, 17:00
The entire universe and all that in there is, is contained within each of our skulls, unfortunatly we have no control over same, were it otherwise, you would not wish to live in Drapers universe.

18th Nov 2004, 19:21
I used to study philosophy, and am embarrased to admit that as an enthusiastic youth I even used to describe myself as a "philosopher".

Now I consider it to be a term like "good person" which can only properly be ascribed to one human being by another - in this case to express appreciation of some kind of unique value in what they have to say.

Such appreciation is itself a philosophical act, just as it is "good" to recognise someone elses "goodness".

Just as I try to be good, I try to be philosophical.

Viewed any other way, it seems to me that one is seriously in danger of dissapearing up ones own arse - where I think the light of wisdom generally don't shine.

18th Nov 2004, 20:23
I'm pink therefore I'm Spam.

NOT a Python reference though it ought to be...

18th Nov 2004, 21:01
Anyone who claims to be a philosopher has not thought things through.

simon brown
18th Nov 2004, 21:06
In Nature and Physics all things tend toward their zero energy state...its late and its time for me to do the same

18th Nov 2004, 22:37
Renes Descartes was a very clever man;
As a thinker there was no keener, but he knew fuc&@ll about the cortina !

(One of Alexi Sayles')

18th Nov 2004, 22:48
To Descartes you may object,
Due to the 'Cortina' effect,
But admit the man did try harder,
Once he'd purchased his Granada.

Atlas Shrugged
18th Nov 2004, 23:06
Never operate a chainsaw after taking a cold pill :\

19th Nov 2004, 05:16
The best reason to study philosophy?

It gives you something to think about whilst standing in the unemployment queue.


Erwin Schroedinger
19th Nov 2004, 05:59
posted 18th November 2004

Today is 'National Philosophy Day'.
I think..........

.......I missed it. :(

19th Nov 2004, 08:12
The best reason to study philosophy

Actually, that is not true. During my brief stay at university many moons ago, the place where I lived had a philosophy student along with the usual mix of 'normal' undergraduates. Whilst we engineering types were worked very hard (it was a while ago remember) his working days seemed to consist of staying in bed until lunchtime with a progression of drop dead gorgeous birds that he had philosophised with the previous evening.

Were we spotty engineering first years jealous? You can bet your arse we were... :rolleyes:

tony draper
19th Nov 2004, 08:25
Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math department - all they need is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better, like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."


The First Law of Philosophy: For every philosopher, there exists an equal and opposite philosopher.

The Second Law of Philosophy: They're both wrong.


itchy kitchin
19th Nov 2004, 10:20
My cousin is a philosophy shtewdunt. He says it's great 'cos he can make any old guff up- the real skill is in justifying it.

Onan the Clumsy
19th Nov 2004, 12:36
Rene Descartes went out to dinner one night and after a sumptuous entree of veal scalopini, the waitress asked if he would like a desert.

"I think not." he replied.

...then he vanished.

19th Nov 2004, 15:49
Question: How do you get a philosopher off your porch?
Answer: Pay for the pizza.

An engineer, an experimental physicist, a theoretical physicist, and a philosopher were hiking through the hills of Scotland. Cresting the top of one hill, they see, on top of the next, a black sheep. The engineer says: "What do you know, the sheep in Scotland are black." "Well, *some* of the sheep in Scotland are black," replies the experimental physicist. The theoretical physicist considers this for a moment and says "Well, at least one of the sheep in Scotland is black." "Well," the philosopher responds, "on one side, anyway."

A man does a good deed and as a reward his guardian angel appears and offers him the answer to any question he wishes to ask. But she says to take his time and she will return in two days. Well the man immediately realized he could become very rich: Which stock will go up the most over the next five years? Which horse will win the Kentucky Derby? Who will win the next Superbowl? etc. But then he thought, why waste this chance of a lifetime on money? After all, money is only a means to happiness. With the right question he can determine the secret of happiness itself! But the more he
thought about it, the more he worried about tricks the angel might play: for example, suppose he asked, "What will make me the happiest man in the universe?" And she answered, "Go live on planet Rigel III" - perhaps true, but perfectly useless.

So our careful questioner decided to take this problem to the nearest philosophy department for assistance. He put the problem to the chair. The chair loved the challenge and as it happens, they were having a departmental meeting that evening anyway, so he told the man to return the next day. When the man returned, the chair beamed and informed him that the department put its best minds together and came up with the best possible question to ask the angel - and naturally he told the man the question to ask.

The next day the angel appeared and asked, "Well, do you have a question for me?" "Yes," the man replied with a great deal of confidence in his voice. "What are the members of the following ordered pair: the first member of the pair is the best possible question I could ask you, and the second member of the pair is the answer to that question?" The angel smiled and said, "You know, you couldn't have asked me a better question. In fact the first member of the pair IS the question you just asked. But that means the second member is the answer I'm giving you now."



20th Nov 2004, 02:51
Ah, did someone mention black sheep? I sit on the remains of one most of the time. I can confirm that its only black on one side.

The outside.

20th Nov 2004, 11:29
How many philosophers does it take to change a light bulb?

A fish.

20th Nov 2004, 11:45
I once thought about becoming a philosopher....


20th Nov 2004, 15:53
*Must resist urge to...........resistance faiding......*

I drink, therefore I am!!!!

(Ahhhhh crap.)

Ok, which way to detention?

20th Nov 2004, 17:11
Fly Heisenberg Airways.
We don't know where we are, but we're making really good time.

20th Nov 2004, 20:59
Just remember the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and the threat of a national philosophers strike.....