View Full Version : Gawd life is exciting

27th Oct 2004, 12:06
Not that any of you really want to know or really care, too bad I am going to tell you anyway;

The highlight of my day was-

drum roll please


scrubbing the bath!!!!

The worse thing about this, It was soo damn satisfying getting that bath so sqeaky clean and white. Put me in a good mood for at least 3 hours.

Yeah I really need to get a life.

Does anyone else have an equally exciting life as mine?

(Actually there was more excitement than that - but I can't tell you about that on a PG rated forum):=

27th Oct 2004, 12:33
You mean you were actually scrubbing the bath in your lacy underwear, when the TV repairman, who had the body of Mark Philippoussis and the mind of ...err, Mark Philippoussis :hmm: unexpectedly appeared at the bathroom door, saying.......... "oh gatfield, you look..."

(should we transfer this to "Finish the sentence")?

27th Oct 2004, 12:58
If Mark Philippoussis appeared in my bathroom, it would take months of surgery to extract the tennis racket and it is doubtful if he would even be able to serve again !!!!

itchy kitchin
27th Oct 2004, 12:59
Highlight of the day?
Looking forward to going to bed.

27th Oct 2004, 13:14
coming across a thread with no bitchin' - that was....awesome. :hmm:

Lon More
27th Oct 2004, 14:28
4 p.m.and I'm out of bed and drinking coffee. Downhill now til bedtime.

27th Oct 2004, 15:14
Seems to me this thread is going precisely nowhere till gatfield returns. Prolly going nowhere after that too. Shame really. :(

27th Oct 2004, 15:20
Bino's, Gatfield has probably got his head down the bidet right now, have a heart!!:p

27th Oct 2004, 15:24
I would be extremely disappointed if said gatfield turned out to be a he. :(

27th Oct 2004, 15:49
Bino's, is your assumption that Gatfield is a girlie based upon the assumption that men would never clean a bath?

27th Oct 2004, 17:14
oh oh, spoke to soon :rolleyes:

Onan the Clumsy
27th Oct 2004, 17:24
No. Gatfield has revealed her feminity on several earlier occasions.

...virtually of course :cool:


Gatfield, I have a possible answer to your problem. If you were to advertise yourself as a domiatrix, you will not only never have to clean a bath again, you'll also make a huge pile of money at the same time. I believe the vacuuming problem can also be solved this way too.

Just a thought. :ok:

27th Oct 2004, 23:15

I've heard that a few men have the scrubbing the bath gene, but I haven't come across any yet. Prolly the same ones who have the find the vegemite in the cupboard gene.


Unfortunately no hot man turned up at my door. The Poo wouldn't do it for me either. So I had to resort to jumping in the bath by myself with the rubber duckie . :E

Yes I think I have too much time on my hands. Maybe I should find a lover to occupy those day time hours when work is slow. I can think of one suitable candidate - but lives too far away.

AH sh*t , maybe I should be good and volunteer for a charity instead.

I already know what the highlight of today will be - weeding. No where near as satisfying as scrubbing the bath.

Feeton Terrafirma
27th Oct 2004, 23:42
I was just going to say..... but it seems pointless now..... that Gatfield is definately ALL female. :ok: And definately would get my help in the bath :D

tony draper
27th Oct 2004, 23:47
The beauty of the tin bath in front of the fire was they didn't show up the muck.

28th Oct 2004, 01:58
Grapefuit boy (aka Drapes), you have missed the point;

there is so much excitement in seeing a filthy bath scrubbed hard and then come up all shiny new and white.

or maybe it is just me that finds such activities rewarding.

28th Oct 2004, 02:02
Here I was thinking its the time of year for coal storage in the bath.
Batheing all year round in Blighty now?

28th Oct 2004, 02:36
or maybe it is just me that finds such activities rewarding.

weeellll, you're certainly the only one that I know of. :uhoh:

Still, whatever rocks your boat I suppose.

Speaking of exciting days, it's now 12.35pm. I've been out of bed half an hour, had a shower, typed this, now I think I'll adjourn to the local tavern for a counter lunch and a couple of beers while I wait for the Aus-India cricket Test to start at 3pm. Since I don't have cable TV, I'll just have to stay there to watch it. Bugga!

28th Oct 2004, 06:19
there is so much excitement in seeing a filthy bath scrubbed hard...
I'm filthy and I have a ar more "life fulfilling" use for a hard scrubber, if you're interested, gatfield. :E

28th Oct 2004, 09:00
Compressor. Sandblasting rig. Marine paint. Who says cleaning the bath can't be a masculine pursuit?:D

itchy kitchin
28th Oct 2004, 10:08
Hear hear! I wrap myself in giant sheets of emery paper (wet and dry) and thrash about until the bare metal shows. I then touch up the paint with Humbrol enamels i have left over from whatever model plane i have just painted...

...god i'm bored.

28th Oct 2004, 10:27
I did an oil change on the bath the other day, then I changed the plugs and the HT leads . . . . . what do you mean thats not the bath ?

itchy kitchin
28th Oct 2004, 10:35
Me and my housemate bathed the cat recently.
THAT was exciting- i've got the scars to prove it!

28th Oct 2004, 10:39

Not obliged to post what I get up to but it is exciting!

Non of you would believe it anyway!


Feeton Terrafirma
28th Oct 2004, 10:56
itchy kitchin

The way to bath a cat is to place said beast in a wire cage, prepare the bath, lots of soap, deep water, and then lower the caged cat into it. The water needs to cover the top of the cage to ensure that all of the cat gets washed. Feel free to push the cage back n forth (like a washing machine). After several minutes the cat will relax a bit more and seem to enjoy the bath. Once this state has been observed it is time to remove the clean cat from the bath. Hang the cage outside in the sun to dry (with cat) for an hour or two. The cat will enjoy the sunshine and appear to sleep through this process.

Release the cat from the cage when dry. Be sure to dry the cage and store carefull until the next cat requires washing. ;)

sexjet69 please feel free to PM the details if you wish to check for believabilty. ;)

28th Oct 2004, 11:06
Sexjet69 - photo's often provide proof of what people get up to :}

tony draper
28th Oct 2004, 11:13
Drapes and another young lad once had to carry one of those tin baths full of potatoes up a very steep and slippy gangplankonce,nearly killed the two of us,we got our own back,we consigned said bath to the deep once we had sailed, we watched it sink down through the clear pacific waters for a long long time,wonder if there will ever be one of they underwater expeditions with sidescan sonar and such to locate wreck of the Draper tin bath and potato container on the ogan floor.

Those big white enamel baths are buggas to haul outside and hang on a nail in the back yard wall.

28th Oct 2004, 11:18
Itchy Kitchin/Feeton.

There are descriptions of several different methods of bathing a cat here:- Bath the Cat (http://www.pprune.org/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=108332)

The thing they all have in common are the requirements to make sure your medical insurance is up to date, the local ambulance is on standby (including Medevac if it's a big cat) and the availability of copious supplies of your blood type at the local hospital.

28th Oct 2004, 11:42
One of the best ways to bath a cat is to use a washing machine and as in the wire cage method, the cat seems to enjoy it, because after its initial hestitation (I recommend leather gloves and a welders mask to put tibbles in the machine), they appear to relax. If one visits a launderette, there are machines which can take 6 or 7 cats at once, and as such, it is often kinder to put them in a sack prior to insertion. That way they always have friends with them.

But, dont any of you naughty people put detergent in with the cat - that would probably remove the oil from its fur and maybe cause serious damage to the cats eyes.

28th Oct 2004, 12:23

Lets say french maids to you and then start thinking!


28th Oct 2004, 14:36
Livin gthe dream.....good for you gatfield.

Can you come and clean my bath?

28th Oct 2004, 14:49

Now that your bath is top notch, forget about those cat's things and think about yourself.
Put some hot water inside with....hmmm some nice bubbles lavande for example. Light candles around it and just take a relaxing bath.

Take it as a "boring therapy session" :ok:

28th Oct 2004, 15:38
Dear gatfield,

The previous occupants in my apartment obviously had a stability problem. They appear to have used some sort of non-slip mat in the bath tub. Evidence of the mat has been indelibly traced into the tub. It's a metal tub if that helps.

Can you suggest anything? BTW, I never take a bath when drunk, I usually fall asleep on the couch. I can't afford to replace the tub. I'm not that bothered really. :(

28th Oct 2004, 16:49
And so begins a new forum:

"Dear Gatfield"........for those with bathroom cleaning problems

28th Oct 2004, 19:07
Sexjet69 - I already have one of those . . . . . . . still, French MaidS - now that makes the mind wobble !!

28th Oct 2004, 19:14
Mind wobbling? Phnuff

28th Oct 2004, 19:47
:E :E :E :E :E :E :E :E

28th Oct 2004, 20:19

nurses too or just maids!


28th Oct 2004, 21:41
depends what the nurse has specialised in !!!

28th Oct 2004, 21:45
sexjet69, you sure you're on the right sort of forum.

I'm sure I've seen your handle on a chat site elsewhere :E

29th Oct 2004, 01:03
Due to popular demand I have now established gatfield's bath services (note the small g).

Anything to do with a bath will be considered;

Cleaning services, remember I scrub hard. The dirtier the better.

Entertainment services.

Pussy washing. Don't worry they love me, I never get scratched.

Puppy washing.

* Extra will be charged for french maid attire
** Extra extra will be charged for bikini attire

*** One glass of red wine will need to be provided.
**** Also request some candles, lavender and Rodriguez or Portishead music.

29th Oct 2004, 01:21
Pussy washing

Where's Mrs Slocombe when you want her?

Feeton Terrafirma
29th Oct 2004, 01:25
Ms gatfield,

I would like to avail myself of your services. I have considered the options on your price list, and decided that I cant afford the french maid attire nor can I afford the bikini attire. I guess no attire will have to do.

I dont have a pussy, but I have been told I have puppy dog eyes. Will that suffice?

I have a good cellar of red and candles, lavender and Rodriguez or Portishead music can be provided.

29th Oct 2004, 04:34
I don't go much for scrubbing nor for putting cats in the bath. Its much more fun to lick a pussy clean.

Feeton Terrafirma
29th Oct 2004, 05:45
Mr Sheep,

I've heard that!! ;)

29th Oct 2004, 06:37
Mr Terrafirma,

How can I decline my worldly services to someone with a puppy dog eyes and a cellar of red! I think you'll be my first customer. Don't worry , I'll wear something nice. :E

Mr Sheep,

You must have rough tongue like a canivore to be able to do that.

How long can you lick for?

29th Oct 2004, 08:16


30th Oct 2004, 20:42
Long enough, gatfield ;)

A carniverous sheep? Now that would be an interesting development eh?

Feeton Terrafirma
31st Oct 2004, 01:57
I'll wear something nice.