View Full Version : MEAT FLAPS

28th Sep 2001, 22:56
While investigating career opportunities under the Golden Arches today I saw a beardy-looking guy get very upset when his order was messed up.

Apparently he'd ordered a bean burger and was served a Quarter Pounder with Cheese. The upshot was that the guy was a vegetarian and he got in a terrible flap over the meat issue.

Anyone else seen one of these meat flaps recently?

28th Sep 2001, 23:44



tony draper
28th Sep 2001, 23:51
The French call a quarter pounder with cheese a Royale.

Not many people know that. ;)

[ 28 September 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

Onan the Clumsy
28th Sep 2001, 23:57
A hundred and twentyseven million French people do.

tony draper
29th Sep 2001, 00:07
Jezus wept!, that many?,time we got some proper aircraft carriers.

29th Sep 2001, 00:44
No, B 74, I have not come across one of these flaps. I believe, though, that approved counter air rage tactics include a kick in the slats. Just winging this as I go.

[ 28 September 2001: Message edited by: Davaar ]

29th Sep 2001, 02:16
Blimey. And I thought I had problems with my nipples . . . :eek:

29th Sep 2001, 02:36
Mind you, G-SX, McD does need to smarten up its agitprop. Maybe hire a spin doctor. If they leave it all as it is, they are just stalling.

29th Sep 2001, 03:39
Good call Onan but, don't forget the rest of the population that learned it by watching "Pulp Fiction"

Hersham Boy
29th Sep 2001, 22:33
B - I could be wrong, but I think that's the joke....?

A dog? Now THAT'S a filthy animal...


29th Sep 2001, 22:44
Any meat is enough to send a committed Vegetarian into a flap. However for some people very specific meats do it, for example hindus are likely to be offended by beef curtains and for people of islamic faith nothing could cause more offense than a pork sword.

Was that the sound of a barrel being scraped?

[ 29 September 2001: Message edited by: B747wideboy ]

30th Sep 2001, 06:23
I have found in my time served... that we would get a lot of "vegetarians" that would come in... spend 10 minutes looking at the menu board, while customers are behind them waiting, than ask, "Do you have any vegetarian burgers?" I kid you not. I have pi55ed me pants so often because I couldn't stop laughing at these poor suckers. better yet the answer one of my new trainees had was absolutely brilliant. She replied to aforementioned customer, "Yes sir, all our burgers are vegetarian, We just claim they are real meat to satisfy our meat eating customers." The **** bought a double qauterpounder and happily munched on it out the front of the store. Turns out my trainee was a vegetarian but she couldn't believe some twats would actually eat at a restraunt well known for it's meat content. Go to bl**dy Hungry Jacks, they got vegie burgers that taste bl**dy disgustiong...

Some people!!

30th Sep 2001, 19:40
H.B. - you're right.

So, what DO they call a Whopper?

30th Sep 2001, 20:33
AAbsolutely true story:

Breakfast time at an interstate side McDonalds somewhere off I-64 in Illinios. Place is very busy with road-warrior families, you know, the ones with overloaded cars amd a million screaming kids.

Granma and granpa sit down at table across from us with a bunch of those buscuit things of several varieties for the whole family. Grandpa excuses himself to go to the bathroom, and granma takes on the duties of doling out the goodies to the grandkids, etc. Discovers one of the biscuit thingies is not of the sausage variety, but of the bacon variety, calls the manager over and complains, and has him switch it for the sausage variety, which she gives to grandpa. Grandpa comes back from the washroom, opens it up, then exclaimes. I didn't order sausage, I ordered bacon! Grandma's reply "they must have made a mistake, I'll have them switch"

Watch out for the blue-haired ladies

1st Oct 2001, 00:09
What a lovely story JAH.

I dont have any story's of hanging bacon. I do have a great deal of knowledge of Wizards Sleeves and Otters Pockets.

gravity victim
1st Oct 2001, 19:47
I once saw a black cat with its throat cut, a very distressing sight.....

Biggles Flies Undone
1st Oct 2001, 20:03
Did somebody mention a badly packed kebab? :rolleyes:

P.S. Think I'll pass on the chilli sauce :eek:

gravity victim
2nd Oct 2001, 14:57
..and while waiting for a bus, I noticed that a billposter had left his glue bucket on the pavement..a number of lose bristles had adhered to its rim...

2nd Oct 2001, 21:50
Oh Wait!! I just re-read the title of this threat. MEAT FLAPS. Now I get it, a discussion of various types of flaps on aircraft. I know fowler, slotted, etc, but never heard of meat.

What kind of meat do they make these types of flaps from? Pork? Beef? Spam? Chicken wings? What type of aircraft, what use? Could be useful on bush aircraft, just in case you had to make an emergency landing and were stuck out in the middle of nowhere, you might be able to cook and eat the flaps. But then if it were in Alaska, you'd have every hungry grizzly for miles coming round for a snack.

Will have to research this. Great, now I'll be spending the rest of the day investigating the internet instead of actually working for a living.

3rd Oct 2001, 05:31
I hear that they keep these things in Saddle Bags out West... Not too sure though

5th Oct 2001, 14:57
When out west with the saddle bags one must always be on the lookout for the rare and seldom seen gutted rabbit. :eek:

5th Oct 2001, 19:42
On such occasions, ensure you have a good supply of furry donuts ;)

6th Oct 2001, 00:25
X-dash8thrasher, there are morning when you just know your alive :)

6th Oct 2001, 03:22
That's it - I'm now going to spend the weekend on a beaver hunt.

gravity victim
6th Oct 2001, 22:51
As a keen birdwatcher, I often go on trips in hope of a sighting of the elusive Flap in its own mating area. I find that getting there involves two options - either an approach from the north, which involves hacking throught some pretty dense scrub, or the longer Southern approach. This means an approach march through a long, steep-sided gorge, followed by a detour around the habitat of the chocolate starfish (best left undisturbed.) After crossing the quaintly named Biffin's bridge, you arrive at the home of the Flaps, with their varying plumage between pink and brown. Don't forget your binoculars!

7th Oct 2001, 00:18
No sign of any beavers yet, but I did spot a bearded clam in the distance.

7th Oct 2001, 00:42

I think the type of flaps in question are split more often then not, as borne out by the story of the poor embarrassed lady with the swimming costume doing just that.

Some are "fouler" than others. I have even seen some differential flaps.

BTW I have just thought of a theory of where the expression "A kick in the slats" came from.

Flapsfortea - what happened to your post?



8th Oct 2001, 11:18
As a keen watcher of wildlife documentaries,I was impressed to see the co-operation which exists between the male and female beaver whilst engaged in the precarious practice of dam building.
It appears that the female is responsible for actually constructing the dam, with materials brought to her by the male.
However, on occasions when the male is away foraging for logs and twigs and the dam is still relatively unstable, the female can become trapped underneath the structure.
In this instance,the returning male invariably spots the problem and using several long, hard thrusts with a tree root, he is able to "lever the beaver" into a position of safety.
Nature's a wonderful thing...

9th Oct 2001, 04:23
:D :D