View Full Version : People I work with

30th Apr 2004, 11:52
The Turtle: Very quiet and moves very slowly. Reminds me a bit of John Major. When he swallows he does this strange movement with his head, as if to stretch his throat. Often scratches his head - moving both his hand and his head to do so.

Winnie-the-Pooh: Large South African chap. Always eating. We have a sweet jar with a narrow neck which we take it in turns to put sweets in. I'm sure he'll get his hand stuck one day. Seems to have his email set up so he gets the notices about birthday cakes at least 2 minutes before everyone else.

The Queen Bee: The team secretary who has been working here for about 17 years. Thinks she knows it all, but in reality is still using systems which were superceded years ago. Leans against you when she's talking to you. Also enjoys creeping up behind people and seeing what they're doing on their PC (e.g. reading PPRuNe :O )

The Hoarder: The other team secretary who always has more work than me. Yet, when I ask if she needs help, says no. The kind of person to hide things in her drawer rather than let anyone else do it.

The Bridge-Master: One of the team managers who plays bridge for the company. Seems to spend some time each day organising matches, then cancelling them again.

Do all work places have such a peculiar mix of people? :confused:

30th Apr 2004, 12:00
The Tourette Kid - will, without warning, bark extremely loudly like he is clearing his throat (I think he actually is clearing his throat!).

The Bearded Lady - she actually has to shave her upper lip and chin.

We love em both though:ok:


30th Apr 2004, 12:02
nice one AB, seems that we all have strange creatures...

The other hoarder - techy geek who will not let anything leave the building, stacks it in his cubicle to someday build atime travel machine with a speed limit.

Socialite - the one who talks about work with everyone, but never seems to do any.

Wannabe - walks around the office talking about the negative 4G dive in formation while reading playboy

Silencio - Looks at monitor says nothing (I checked it WAS work and not Pprune)

Me - surfing Pprune and pretending to work, the odd spurts oof laughter to posts in JB gives me away though.

I nearly edited my last post for spelling errors, but I\'m too tired. Please bare with me!

30th Apr 2004, 12:21
Please bare with me! That's a chat-up line I've not heard in a while. :hmm:

Sleepy: Suffers from insomnia at home, but not at work. Gets in late, has to work through lunch, then leaves late. Looks like he crawled out of bed still dressed from the night before & came straight in. Was prescribed 2 weeks of valium, which he finished in 3 days.

30th Apr 2004, 12:37
*blush* I thought you would'nt realise a subliminal chat up line, oh well :(

Capt. Cleaver - knows absolutely EVERYTHING about ANYTHING, even what I had for breakfast. When confronted about nuclear physics he always changes the subject to gardening.

Happy Harry - cannot stop smiling or giggling, must have been upto somthing naughty last night!

30th Apr 2004, 12:41
You mean you got a job?
Come on Coco, chill....

Evening Star
30th Apr 2004, 13:03
Winnie-the-Pooh: Large South African chap. Always eating. We have a sweet jar with a narrow neck which we take it in turns to put sweets in. I'm sure he'll get his hand stuck one day. Seems to have his email set up so he gets the notices about birthday cakes at least 2 minutes before everyone else.

Err, except for the South African bit I fear this is how people may describe me ... especially judging by recent emails about cakes.

My office? Three of us. Sat behind me is:

BIG SCOUSER. The two of us are the tallest in the Department. We sit back to back in a way that can neatly triangulate anybody who needs intimidating. Copes well with jokes about hub caps, missing wheels, Yozzer, etc. About once a month somebody will send him this http://www.airliners.net/open.file?id=271075 along with a joke about Liverpool Airport. Every Monday he will, in an almost lascivious tone, describe his Sunday dinner.

Along the office is:

HRH MINOR DEITY. She is a distant relation of HRH The Queen. A lovely, friendly person who I never seen be unkind to any students, no matter how deserving an individual may be of a rocket, and yet at the same time not a push over. We tend to swap large quotations from Monty Python, much to the despair of Large Scouser. Minor deity is an in joke.

PS. Neither is the hypochondriac about whom I recently whinged over on Agony Aunt. She works in another office, of which I am very glad.

30th Apr 2004, 13:17
The [email protected]: Shouts the odds at everybody then sits on his arse and does nothing

The bitch: Talks about everybody and runs everyone into the ground

The cow: The boss

The [email protected]: Same as the [email protected] but can't do anything right

The f*ckwit: Has to be told a thousand times how to do something and still doesn't get it right

The over enthusiastic student: Wants to do everything herself and then tells me what I'm doing wrong

The d!ckhead: Full of himself, always cracks pathetic jokes and thinks he's Mr tough

The tart: Everyone including the cat has been up her

The bubble head: Completely clueless, always cheery and happy and acts as if we're all one big family :yuk:

Biggles Flies Undone
30th Apr 2004, 13:31
Thrush - whistles all the time and is an irritating c***

a is dum
30th Apr 2004, 13:32
G-Alan seems to be happy at work! :ok:

30th Apr 2004, 13:47
Interesting this. We have recently sussed that one of the disaffected lads in the dealing room has started a Blog. He doesn't know that we know about the Blog.

As with most Bloggers he's most meticulous in applying nicknames to the characters here. It's been great fun attaching real names to nicknames.....

The guy recently resigned and because he's not front-room staff has been forced to work out his notice (most traders' feet don't touch the floor if they resign, it's a bin-liner jobbie).

His comments on the Blog are getting more and more bitter.....

30th Apr 2004, 14:01
A select few of the characters we have here...

The bull****er: If you've done something, he's done it better. A thousand times. His mate was in the SAS, his other mate is pally with the pope. Also considers smoking to be good for Asthma (seriously!) and after having a heart attack last year, eats 2 bacon butties, prawn crackers, you name it, for breakfast.

The fat one: Twice the size of any normal man, out of breath after climbing one flight of steps but bravely makes it to his desk each day (he's reason why I keep a resus-aid in my desk drawer (the other reason is the bull****er)).

The gossip: Yap yap yap. Usually at HIS worst when you're trying to concentrate.

The Team Leader: Couldn't lead himself out of a paper bag.

The Venezuelan: Nobody can really understand her but she still gets paid for turning up every day!

Papa Charlie
30th Apr 2004, 14:40
Hey! I didn't realise we all worked at the same place! :eek:

30th Apr 2004, 14:46
Miss "married to the Company"

-late forties / early fifties / left on the shelf. Strong relationship with her mother, if not still living at home. Lives and breathes her work, coming in early, staying late, in at weekends. Has no social life, and cancels other things (Doctor, dentist) due to work. Everything is super, mega urgent, all of the time.

Nothing and no one to go home to, needs to feel needed and wanted by someone, her lack of perspective means that work becomes more important and urgent, so more time has to be spend there, a never-ending cycle downwards....

sad really; and this one's my immediate boss. :{