PDA

View Full Version : Boy Trapped in Refrigerator Eats Own Foot!


chuks
25th Apr 2004, 15:03
Well, not actually... That was just a newspaper headline I saw in a movie. I think it was meant to be a joke.

On the other hand, it turns out there weren't 3,000 North Koreans killed in that train explosion either. What a disappointment! I had my compassion glands all revved up there, ready for some deep contemplation on the deeper meaning of lif, when it turned out to be largely unnecessary since there were only about 150 dead, a shortfall of 95%, even if half of them were children. Okay, give it an extra 50% for the death of a child, that still makes a shortfall of 92.5% in my daily quota of bad news from PPrune. (That thing about the kid in the oven I just glossed over as too gross for anyone but a hard-boiled Manhattanite. It doesn't count.)

Is there department I can go to and make a claim for this? 'Refunds'?

Today the sun is shining and the birds are singing but the goldfish are doing something weird out there in the fish pond, sort of gulping at the surface. Either there is something they are eating (pollen granules?) or else they are drowning. I know they are remarkably stupid, even for fish, but is it possible for fish to drown? Perhaps we can make the headlines tomorrow if nothing worse comes to pass in the world. 'Mass Death by Drowning in German Fish Pond. "Kiss of Life" Given to No Avail by Hero Aviator...'Stay tuned, please.

Meanwhile, I guess it is time to go clean the squashed bugs off the motorcycles before going out later to collect some more. Then comes posing before the Eis Palast. Life might be meaningless but it can be very pleasant too. If I get some bad news I will be sure to share it with all of you. Meanwhile, ta for now.

spork
25th Apr 2004, 16:05
Try oxygenating the water for them - is it moving water or still?

BombayDuck
25th Apr 2004, 18:56
"Boy Trapped in Refrigerator Eats Own Foot!"

A Leslie Nielsen movie? Either Naked Gun series or Spy Hard. More probably the former!

chuks
25th Apr 2004, 19:59
It's circulating water. I think we just got landed with a lot of weird fish.... They seem perky enough, they just gather in one part of the pond gasping, sort of. I cannot hear any moaning, on the other hand, so that they don't seem distressed. Check tomorrow's headlines for further news about this.

Good call! It was 'Airplane'.... When the aircraft is in distress you see all these newpaper headlines, with one of them, 'The National Enquirer' showing the one quoted.

reynoldsno1
26th Apr 2004, 02:06
Our goldfish do the same thing from time to time ... ignore them, they're just attention seekers....

pigboat
26th Apr 2004, 02:41
While hand-lining for cod, back when such creatures existed, one would occasionally catch a deep water sculpin. The fish was of no commercial value since it couldn't be eaten, so it was always thrown back overboard. However, what it lacked in commercial it more than made up for in amusement value. If you patted it's belly it filled with air and swelled - swole? up to several times it's normal size. It couldn't swim away because it wouldn't sink and floated away belly-up for several minutes until the air escaped. It bedevilled the seagulls no end when they landed beside the thing and tried to peck a hole in it.

chuks
26th Apr 2004, 12:20
You guys must have had a lot of time on your hands, out there fishing for cod.... 'Oy, Bert! It's my turn to pat the sculpin!'

Thanks for all the advice about the goldfish. I put some fresh water in the pond and told them I am going away now, so that they are on their own for a couple of months. They seemed to take the news very calmly.

Since they are not all gasping, and they are not lethargic perhaps it is just some crude attempt to get my attention and the attention of some of you as well. It seems to have worked, actually.

Another thing is that when I throw bread crumbs in the water they flee in panic. I thought these creatures were all very enthusiastic about crumbs. Perhaps we have a group of escapees from an episode of 'Mr Bean'?