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no_name_oz
18th Aug 2001, 21:10
I'll start off. Obviously ATC because no matter how wrong I get it I still walk away at the end of the day!

Grainger
18th Aug 2001, 22:44
Well I get to teach Physics, drink beer, drive fast cars, fly helicopters and [email protected] beautiful women. :cool:

Pretty hard to beat :D

no_name_oz
18th Aug 2001, 22:45
Job description or wish list?

Grainger
18th Aug 2001, 23:17
Oh, it's true alright :cool:

Now if I can just arrange to get paid for some of it ....

tony draper
19th Aug 2001, 00:15
You need a hobby Mr G, such a dull life needs some outside interest,I highly recommend the collecting of train numbers, everyone finds it exciting. ;)

Grainger
19th Aug 2001, 01:39
But where would I find the time, drapes ?

tony draper
19th Aug 2001, 02:07
I wanted the gold, and I sought it
I scrabbled and mucked like a slave,
Was it famine or scurvy I-fought it;
I hurled my youth into a grave.
I wanted the gold, and I got it-
Came out with a fortune last fall
somehow life not what I thought it.
And somehow the gold isn't all.

There's gold and its haunting and haunting
its luring me on as of old;
yet it isn't the gold that I'm wanting
so much as just finding the gold.
Its the great big big broad land way up yonder,
its the forrest where silence has lease,
Its the beauty that thrills me with wonder,
its the stillness that fills me with peace.

The search is the thing Mr G, not the finding. ;)

[ 18 August 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

Bally Heck
19th Aug 2001, 02:50
Ah yes. Was it Nevile Shute Norway, or perhaps it was a byline in one of his books. "To travel hopefully is better than to arrive, and to labour is it's own reward"

[email protected] beautiful women may well be the exception that proves this rule.

Blacksheep
19th Aug 2001, 08:14
To get back on thread, the man with the best job in the world is the man who decides when the Talisker is ready to go into the bottle. I've applied, I'm on the waiting list and I'll die before I get to the top; but as Mr. Draper says, the anticipation is what its really all about...

**********************************
Through difficulties to the cinema

Squawk 8888
19th Aug 2001, 10:01
In Guam it's illegal for virgins to marry, so there are men who get *paid* to deflower young women before the nuptials :D

golden_hands
19th Aug 2001, 13:48
Oh not again, another "who's d*ck is bigger" variation.

Heading for Guam to proof it :D :D :D

Grainger
20th Aug 2001, 13:02
Not bragging, gh - I'm as baffled by it as anyone else.

Most mystifying thing is, the physics is frequently more of an aphrodisiac than the helicopters.

Now can anyone explain that ?

golden_hands
20th Aug 2001, 13:16
I'm with you Grainger,

Sometimes the outcome of a physics mystery is beautiful by itself. It is of a higher order than flying, certainly when flying horizontal windmills (sorry couldn't resist that :D )

Feeton Terrafirma
20th Aug 2001, 14:41
Well I thought I'd really like my job!

When I started the boss said, "if I'm an arsehole, say so" :eek:

When I started the boss said, "if you want a pay rise, just ask" :cool:

When I started the boss said, "if you don't like the work, don't come to work" :D


Since I started the job I've told the boss daily that he's an arsehole because when I ask for a pay rise he ignores me, and when I don't feel like going to work he makes me, and just to top it off I can't even quit because my boss won't accept my resignation. :confused:

I work in IT which I love, and despite what I said above I will never work for anyone else. ;)

BTW, I have my own company and work for myself :)

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 14:41
Concider yourself fortunate Mr G,think about all those ancient Greek teacher's, philosophy was the big turn on then,and all of the students were chaps. :eek:

[ 20 August 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 15:23
An interesting observation, Herr Draper.

The Athenians ordered Socrates to top himself, which he duly did by imbibing some hemlock. Died surrounded solely by his closest male mates, which bit surprising considering he'd been married for about forty years.

Plato nearly got himself topped by some grumpy king of Sicily, not sure which, for getting himself involved too much in politics. Managed to leg it back to Athens, then hid under his bed for a few years. Not like the Sicilians to leave someone alive like that. In the end Plato died of old age, surrounded by young boys, which still causes a few tongues to wag in spite of the fact he married young.

Aristotle heartily disapproved of politics... until given a call by Philip of Macedonia to go and train his son to be an effect ruler and conqueror. Many think that Aristotle did his job a little too well, seeing as Alexander proceeded to annex two thirds of the known world. Little rascal. At least he didn't threaten to kill Aristotle, which seems to be a first for a major philosopher. Aristotle also died surrounded by young lads. Not sure if his wife got a look in.

Lesson learned? Stay away from philosophy 'cos people try to kill you. Also, there's no decent totty in philosophy.

Rubbish job.

TW

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 16:11
Indeed T W, almost as dangerous as being a unknown actor with a speaking, part on the bridge of that starship Enterprise.
Wasn't one of those Greeks killed by a tortoise travelling at terminal velocity from a great height,or am I getting mixed up again ,which is happening with increasing frequency nowadays. ;)

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 17:12
Not aware of any Greek being killed in such an unfortunate manner. Probably happened to someone, somewhere though. I hear that some parts of Athens are especially dangerous with regards to flying reptiles, bottles, bricks, etc. Especially after football matches.

Best to wear a hard hat.

TW

You want it when?
20th Aug 2001, 17:57
Back to the thread...

THe only answer is "me". I got paid to do this stuff how amazing. Wish I had windows, and was a pilot - but then as anyone who has seen my landings will tell you - The whole world is happy I'm not a pilot ;)

FlyingForFun
20th Aug 2001, 18:29
Not a job, I know, but...

...my project tutor for my final year project at university was great.

Went to meet him to discuss my project for the first time. "FFF, we can do this two ways. Either you can come and see me every week, or you can never come and see me at all. I strongly recommend you go for the first one.

"Now, what happens when you come and see me each week is, well, it's basically up to you.

"You can say 'Paul, I've done loads of work this week, but I'm stuck on this point here,' and I'll try to help you.

"Or you can say 'Paul, I'm really hung over, I've done nothing all week,' and I'll give you a couple of Alcazeltzer and you can be on your way."

And he was 100% true to his word. Including the "try to help you" bit. I explained a particular problem I was having. He said "Hmm, that's tricky. Have you tried looking on the Internet for answers?" "Yes Paul, there's loads of sites that solve most of the problem, but none of the handle this particular point." "Oh, I didn't think of that. Well, if you can't figure it out, leave that bit out."

I liked having Paul as my project tutor!

FFF
---------

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 19:37
Hmm, I think that Herr Draper and TW have just been admonished for introducing a digression into this serious, constructive thread. I thought it livened up the discussion, myself, and, as a bonus, added a level of intellectual class hitherto absent from the typical Jet Blast discussion.

I live and learn.

TW

Grainger
20th Aug 2001, 20:10
yeah, how very naughty of you both, TW and td.

Imagine not taking the thread seriously :o

You'll just have to start a new one - "Philosopher's knob" or thereabouts...

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 20:29
Draper is bloody sure one of them ancient Greeks was killed by a falling tortoise,Draper shall track down the reference if it takes him the rest of his life. ;)

Look out Google.


Aha!the search engine triumphs again.
Aeschylus, 525-456 BC, playright, killed when Eagle mistook his bald boiler for a rock, and dropped tortoise onto same from a great height. :)

PS, you are correct these threads begin to exibit large amounts of inertia,great energy has to be employed to drag them off track.
It could be done with just a idle comment tagged on to the end of a post one time.

[ 20 August 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 21:25
An unfortunate, yet strangely fascinating, way to die. My heartfelt condolences to his family and friends, although they may have recovered from the shock by now.

Can you confirm that this hasn't happened since? The population of the planet has increased dramatically in the last two thousand years or so; surely this must be happening regularly now? Maybe baldy blokes in kagools should be wearing motor-cycle helmets when hiking in the Lake District? What about Yellowstone? Do the authorities cull American Bald Eagles there (oh, the irony), just to be on the safe side? They should bloody well think about it.

I'm sorry, but an issue quite as important as this one is bound to release a torrent of questions.

TW (greatly concerned)

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 21:33
A bill should be passed with all haste requiring all tortoise's to be fitted with a teflon shell cover so as to prevent Eagles gripping same.
As someone who owns a somewhat bald pate I think this should be implemented with some urgency. ;)

FlyingForFun
20th Aug 2001, 21:34
*Please* can we try to keep this thread on topic? Please, please, please????


:D :D :D :p :p :D :D :D

FFF
----------

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 21:41
That's the trouble with the Eagles: One cracking album, and nowt since. Good music around then. Anyone know who sung 'Horse With No Name'? About the same era, I think. I also liked American Pie, but felt the happy-clappy finale a bit silly.

Where were we?

TW

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 21:41
Well, ok then, my job, very cushy at the momment, telephone hasn't rang with offer of gainfull employment for a while, makes me think that a serious case of law abiding has broken out among the citizens of this land.
Was never fortunate with regards to meeting beautiful women in my line of work,as Mr Grainger, spent a lot of time in police stations surrounded by WPC's most of whom had bigger nobs than me anyway. ;)


PS, bit OT there Mr TW, once stayed at the Hotel California,in Sanfrancisco, dont know if it was the same one.
I liked that been thru the desert with a horse with no name myself.
If you wait a trice, Draper shall track it dwn with his magic search engine.

[ 20 August 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

FlyingForFun
20th Aug 2001, 21:47
Ah, we can always rely on Herr Draper to bring some irrelevance into his posts, even when he does stick to the topic!

So, td, care to inform us how you came to be familiar with the size of said WPCs' nobs?

FFF
---------

(Hey, our whole network is down except the Internet! Bliss.... Pity it had to happen so late in the day, though. Does this count as the best job?)

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 21:48
Back on thread as requested:

I think we've safely established that being a tortoise is a rubbish career choice. Anyone know if turtles get off more lightly?

TW

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 21:54
Just says america, Mr W, don't know if thats a band, classical music person myself,sniff
ARTIST: America
TITLE: A Horse With No Name


On the first part of the journey
I was looking at all the life
There were plants and birds and rocks and things
There was sand and hills and rings

The first thing I met was a fly with a buzz
And a sky with no clouds
The heat was hot and the ground was dry
But the air was full of sound

{Refrain}
I been through the desert on a horse with no name
It felt good to be out of the rain
In the desert your can remember your name
'Cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain
(la la la...)

After two days in the desert sun
My skin began to turn red
After three days in the desert fun
I was looking at a riverbed
And the story it told of a river that flowed
Made me sad to think it was dead

You see...
{Refrain}

After nine days I let the horse run free
'Cause the desert had turned to sea
There were plants and birds and rocks and things
There was sand and hills and rings
The ocean is a desert with its life underground
And a perfect disguise above
Under the cities lies a heart made of ground
But the humans will give no love

You see, ...
{Refrain}

Tricky Woo
20th Aug 2001, 22:04
Many thanks, Herr Draper.

Your helpful post goes a long way to relieve the deep depression brought about by the dreadful news regarding Aeschylus.

You might be onto something with this magic search engine of yours. Try entering "WHO HAS THE BEST JOB?" and see if you can put no_name_oz's mind to rest.

While you're at it, try "IS THERE A GOD?" as I've a rather lucrative bet going with my best mate.

I await the results with breathless anticipation.

TW

tony draper
20th Aug 2001, 22:16
Yeh Mr W, That search engine is a source of endless delight,wish I had access to one twenty years ago, I was always a argumentative bastard, and would bet people on obscure references that I could never find again.
Just typed in Draper family and it takes you to thousands of Geneology pages, the distant relatives you find are absolutly amazing
Jessie James Draper, don't think he sold shoes for a living.
Captain Samuel Draper, Pirate ,privateer, all round scoundrel.
Real good stuff to be had. ;)

RW-1
20th Aug 2001, 23:47
>>Well I get to teach Physics, drink beer, drive fast cars, fly helicopters and [email protected] beautiful women.<<

I had no issues with G's list, but he does have it arse-backwards in terms of priorities. :D

HugMonster
21st Aug 2001, 00:17
No arguments there, RW! :)

Grainger
21st Aug 2001, 00:44
Hey, don't knock the Physics ;)

And never mind the order - take it from me, just don't try and do 'em all at the same time ! :o

dingducky
23rd Aug 2001, 18:33
i am an unemployed loser
the money is lousy but i have a lot of free time to get my pprune fixes :p
my sister keeps telling me that i should have a baby. you get more money if you have a kid. but i see 2 problems with this idea
1) i don't believe in imaculate conceptions so my eggs are destined to remain unfertilized :o
2) would have to look after a whiny, screaming brat that just sucks the money out of you and always has something comming out of one end or the other :eek:

golden_hands
24th Aug 2001, 01:20
Uhm Dingy about the first problem: I don't see it :D :D :D

To the second: take a nanny for the extra money received. :cool:

dingducky
24th Aug 2001, 08:40
golden_hands
what to do mean? a turkey baster baby? :confused:
and what is the point of having a baby for the money if all the money goes on having a nanny??? :confused: :confused: :confused:

Grainger
24th Aug 2001, 13:50
Hey Dings;

Anything I can do to help - you just call me, OK ? ;)

gravity victim
24th Aug 2001, 14:45
Ding,

Little contribution on way by DHL marked 'Glass- urgent biological supplies - Handle with Care'.
Obtaining it for you was a pleasure. :D :D

SLF 999
24th Aug 2001, 15:21
The best job in the world is doing something that you love doing and getting paid for it.

Now all I have to do is find it !

Hagbard the Amateur
24th Aug 2001, 17:57
I can't knock being an actor really apart from the infrequent contracts. Like being an airline pilot I suppose, most people who don't do it think it is easy and god given in terms of "talent." It is actually bl00dy hard work but worth the rewards.
Proof being - I'm off to a feature film premiere in three weeks that I'm in. Loads of compliments (however false), free drinks and a temporary atmosphere of total success.
Can't beat it.

[ 24 August 2001: Message edited by: Hagbard the Amateur ]

golden_hands
24th Aug 2001, 21:08
Hey Dingducky look at Graingers reply, do I need to say more? :p

The :cool: smiley was meant as a: "sure that is going to help!" which we know (a nanny) won't. (expensive little darlings).

Is it difficult to get a job at "earth"?

traveler
25th Aug 2001, 18:15
I think my goldfish (Jacques) does pretty well for himself.
My wife cleans the tank every week and feeds him every day.
Recently he got upgraded to larger living quarters with designer rocks and plants.
And he now has a cute little mate (Lara) to chase around.
He's sorta like a model I suppose, he just has to be there and look good.

Hagbard the Amateur
25th Aug 2001, 22:28
Yeah traveler, I've had contracts like that.