View Full Version : Ahh CRM, ODE TO A COPILOT

10th Aug 2001, 05:35
Fwd from Continental pilot site, sure it's been "floating" around for some time, but the first I'd seen of it...


I am the Captain, sitting left of the nose,
And so, you mother, what I say......goes.
You think you're King Sh*t 'cause you're young and you're smart,
I may be old, but don't you call me "Old Fart"
I've been flying these birds since you were in diapers,
While the biggest you've seen is one of those Pipers.
You never do anything, whenever you're told,
The preflight you'll do if it isn't too cold.
You sit on your ass like a bump on a log,
The weather shows clear, but you're in a fog.
You constantly bitch about making low pay,
The majors will call now, any old day.
Delta will hire; you'll make a good buck,
But let me tell you, your landings still suck.
The approaches you make are hardly desired,
How in the hell did you ever get hired?
Your NDB's are somewhat bizarre,
Your best approach was made in a bar.
And those crosswind landings... a hell of a treat,
With tires a-hopping like a rabbit in heat.
Now lightning is jumping all over the sky,
As you cringe in your seat all ready to cry,
Your knuckles are white, your face so pale,
So what if we're flying in quarter-inch hail.
Your logbook shows hours, a thousand times ten,
But those flights were all taken on a papermate pen.
Now Kennedy's down to "obscured and a quarter",
We're holding at Sardi, out over the water.
You're very confused, can't figure the fix,
Your altitude's slipped from seven to six.
You couldn't determine what the entry should be,
That Immemlman turn scared the sh*t out of me!
Oh! Life is so easy in the co-pilot's seat,
Tis the guy on the left who takes all the heat.
When the sh*t hits the fan, you don't give a damn,
Your licence you'll keep...it's the Captain they''ll hang!!!

Author unknown

10th Aug 2001, 11:32
Nice one Lazy B!!

Just printed it out; good for a nice bit of entertainment at work next week! :D