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View Full Version : OK, so Canada is cool! how are we Aussies perceived?


DanAir1-11
6th Apr 2004, 05:54
OK, apologies for the plagiarism, but is not immitation the sincerest form of flattery??

Have read and enjoyed the thread on Canada, a truly beautiful country indeed. Thought it would be interesting to see how we Antipodean types are perceived??

But first, just for fun in our unique self effacing way....

Hey.
I'm not a shearer
or a swagman
and I don't live with nor eat Kangaroos,
(and especially not skippy)
and I don't know Bruce, Sheila or Wazza from Australia,
although I'm certain they're really, really nice.

I have a Prime Minister,
not a President. (although I fear that GB Junior exerts his influence over our dimwitted instatute little Johnny)
I speak English and Strine (Australian when pronounced in the native tongue with a mouthful of bush flies!)
but hear increasing amounts of Americanisms!
and I pronounce it however it suits me with a mouthful of flies
I drink tea from a Billy, and enjoy a good yarn with the blokes at smoko
An egg-nishner keeps me cool throughout the immense heat of summer!

I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack.
(Providing I no longer travel overseas! Thanks to our lickspittle PM)
I believe in peace keeping, NOT policing. (read this Johnny)
DIVERSITY, NOT assimilation,
AND THAT THE PLATYPUS IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE ANIMAL.
AN AKUBRA IS A BEAUT HAT,
A 44 (GALLON DRUM) MAKES A BEAUT BARBIE (BBQ)
AND IT IS PRONOUCED 'ZED' NOT 'ZEE', 'ZED'! (TOUCHE!)

AUSTRALIA IS THE LARGEST ISLAND AND A CONTINENT!!!
THE FIRST NATION OF SARCASM AND RUGBY LEAGUE!
AND WE ALWAYS BEAT NEW ZEALAND AND SOUTH AFRICA AND ENGLAND, OOH ESPECIALLY ENGLAND, YEAH, AND PRETTY MUCH EVERY ONE ELSE AT CRICKET AND BEER DRINKING AND LIZARD RACING AND CAMEL-POLO AND TWO-UP AND MILK CARTON REGATTAS.

MY NAME IS BILLY
AND I AM PROUDLY AUSTRALIAN
(recent (sort of) plagiarism)

Rollingthunder
6th Apr 2004, 06:03
Rather well done, I thought.
Join me for tea or a prime rib and a few brews at the Empress in Victoria.
Looking west from there, the next feet dry is Japan.


Bloody Air Canada thread.

squire
6th Apr 2004, 06:47
Sounds like crap if we judge it on these policies.....


The NSW Government may change child protection laws after a teacher who was sacked for having an affair with a student 33 years his junior was awarded almost A$28,000 ($32,400) compensation for stress.

Jeff Sinclair sought redress in the NSW Workers Compensation Commission, claiming the education department's handling of the allegations against him caused him "psychological injury".

And........

:} Smokers should be denied joint replacement surgery, breast reconstruction and a wide range of other elective surgery, say doctors.

BlueWolf
6th Apr 2004, 08:59
All in all, you jokers are alright.

I mean as a nation Australia can tend to be a bit loud, brash, and arrogant; but that isn't always a bad thing, and hey, you have a few things to be proud of.

I've met a few Ockers who were ar$eholes, but then I've met a few Kiwis who fit that description also. Most of the Aussies I've met have been decent people.

There is something of a "wannabe the US" about the Australian psyche of late, and that does grate a bit; as does your national fascination with League, which is regarded as rather de rigeur on this side of the ditch. No-one other than Aucklanders (and those of Pacific descent) has much time for the 13-man game here, especially since real rugby went professional. And let's face it, two thirds of Zealand doesn't have much time for Auckland.

You don't really have a winter, or a real ski industry, so you can't be called a "complete" nation; but there's a lot which is good about the Great Sunburnt Land. At least you still have an Air Force.

Probably the only thing about Australia which ever really gets up Zealanders noses, is your national predilection for trying to pretend that you're somehow superior to us, which as you, we, and everybody else, knows full well, is complete bollox.:E

But in general (apart from being too bloody hot and overpopulated with things poisonous), Australia, and Australians, on balance, are OK.

I must visit one day, in order to validate my prejudices

:E

:ok:

ChrisVJ
6th Apr 2004, 08:59
Rollingthunder
Don't do the Empress but we'll be over there in a couple of weeks, might do the Sticky Wicket if it's not too busy.

Gainesy
6th Apr 2004, 09:08
Dan,
Yer seem to have left out Rugby Union. :cool:

Ric Capucho
6th Apr 2004, 09:11
Do aussies still have arrows printed on their shirt and trousers?

Ric

DanAir1-11
6th Apr 2004, 10:15
Ric,

Sure do, how else would we know which direction the pub was??
it's our colonial ADF.

What's this Rugby Union that has been mentioned, is that some kind of millitant organisation??

(bl00dy hell, You don't think I would mention something we got beaten by Eng-er-land at do you????).

Ascend Charlie
6th Apr 2004, 10:20
Do Poms still wear powdered wigs and say "Pip! Pip! old chap?"

I did a gallop around the world last year, and despite some faults, Oz has the greatest combination of everything to be the best place on the planet. People will pick holes in the faults, but the benefits far outweigh the rest.

"Two arms
Two hands
Two steely bands
Alone upon this earth he stands
A hero of his native land.
Australia!
You bloody beauty!
So, up the Old Red Rooster
And drink more piss!"*





* Old jungle saying

josephshankes
6th Apr 2004, 10:38
What does the world think of Australians?? Not a lot is the answer.

Tell me something. What have the Australians ever invented??

Bre901
6th Apr 2004, 10:40
Probably a good place to start a fish'n chips business in the future (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/3564857.stm).
You just need to find a cheap and reliable supply of potatoes, fish and vinegar, and Bob's your uncle.

TamedBill
6th Apr 2004, 10:52
josephshankes,

They have invented lots of things!

Vegemite
Rocky Road
Woolworths that sell food
Bunderberg rum
Toy koala bears
Flavoured Milk
Toy Kangaroos,


and that's just for starters!

DanAir1-11
6th Apr 2004, 10:56
Now Now Josephshankes, Australians in our short 200 or so years as a settled nation have invented:

The Flight Data Recorder, better known as the black box,
Implanted version of the hearing aid
Tall Poppy Syndrome
The Hills Hoist
The Sickie
Vegemite
Durex
Ugg Boots
and lots of other really useful things that don't currently spring to the forefront of my thoughts!!!

Oh yes, we invented ungracious losing!!!Gladly long since past as we now tend to win most things, except for that damned millitant Rubgymathingo.

Onya Cobber

montys ex teaboy
6th Apr 2004, 11:25
And xxxx, only because they cant spell.

Boss Raptor
6th Apr 2004, 11:43
On the nice side Paul Hogan, Neighbours, Kangaroos etc...on the not so nice Keating, Murdoch (lets not forget EAAC's Mr. Stoddard) and other assorted snakes/lizards ;)

BALIX
6th Apr 2004, 11:48
Erm, ever tried to use an Aussie Durex? It is almost impossible to make it seamen-tight and is bloody painfull when you take it off :E :E :E

BlueWolf
6th Apr 2004, 12:19
You never invented Vegemite or Ugg boots, that was us, along with Phar Lap, Pavlova, Russell Crowe and God knows what else.
See what I mean?
:confused: :E

Aileron Roll
6th Apr 2004, 12:39
Do you still need a criminal record to get into Australia ?

surely not
6th Apr 2004, 12:41
C$ap cricket team though.........they only know how to win, not rounded persons at all :D :D

Ric Capucho
6th Apr 2004, 12:42
...you certainly need one to break out of it. Aussies still put files into their birthday cakes, to comemorate their ancestors.

Ric

redsnail
6th Apr 2004, 12:58
I guess I am biased regarding Oz and since I only visit the place every 2 or so years I do miss it.
Australians have invented a lot of things. As do the Scots, they get a bit miffed when other nations take the credit. Google is a wonderful tool for finding these things out.
What frustrates me and I dare say an awful lot of inventors is the lack of wisdom from either the govt or the manufacturing sector to capitalise on their achievements. However, I reckon a few countries have that complaint.
Of course there's the obnoxious Aussie. He/she is a particularly painful character but every nation has them.
I guess many military forces around the world have found the Aussies (and Kiwis = ANZAC) a reliable force to being on side with and a formidable foe. As we are rapidly approaching ANZAC day (April 25) many Aussies do pause for thought and reflection on that day. It is far more special to us than Jan 26, Australia Day.
Yes, our history is a bit blighted but all in all, I think as a nation, Australia has done bloody well in such a short period of time.
My great-great-great grandfather was the mayor of Sydney just before Federation. In fact, he along with Parkes et al were part of the push to become independant from Great Britain. His name and initials can be found on many of the fine old buildings in Sydney.
My heritage is half convict and half 10 tourist. Dad was born in Glasgow.
As an Aussie in the UK it's quite amusing how we are seen. To be honest, I haven't had a problem here. Sure, the occassional ribbing about the Rugby but that is to be expected, they (the English folk) soon shut up about the cricket and the soccer and the league. :D

I think we're seen as a nation who has a proud sense of national identity, good at sport, reliable and hard working however, with a bloody good sense of humour and fun at parties. Oh and ready to argue and swear a lot. Not to mention drink a bit too.

Ausatco
6th Apr 2004, 13:09
Invented by Aussies:

See this list. (http://inventors.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.convictcreations.com%2Fcul ture%2Finventions.htm)

They left off the DME, which I'm sure we invented.

I bet there's more, but we're too modest to brag about them!!!

AA

surely not
6th Apr 2004, 13:11
Modest = Aussie?????????

Aussie = Modest ?????????

I suppose they do go together every now and then :O

redsnail
6th Apr 2004, 13:30
A cluey Qantas engineer improved the first autopilots as well. His name was George.

:D

josephshankes
6th Apr 2004, 18:54
Ausatco

A modest Ozzie? yeah right.

Like an Ozzie with its mouth shut.

Chaffers
6th Apr 2004, 19:10
If you can find a non-whingeing Ozzy then they're always a good laugh. Tend to be in the minority though.

London barmen are rather fond of telling what a paradise Oz is, which naturally explains why they swarm over here to work in 4/h jobs.

Then again when you find a Pod without a chip on his or her shoulder then they're always fantastic peeps. There does seem to be a big inferiority complex still lurking there though.