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View Full Version : Yo' Mammas so fat...


topcat450
20th Feb 2004, 19:26
I'll start....

Yo mamma's so fat it takes a train an two bus journeys to get on her good side.

HomerJay
20th Feb 2004, 19:32
when she stepped on a weghing scales it shouted ONE AT A TIME PLEASE!

Your mother's so fat, when three masked robbers broke into her house, she yelled "RAPE!" and they yelled "NO!"

ur moma is so fat she went down the stairs and broke her leg and gravy came out.

Your mother's so fat, she got busted for carrying 200 pounds of crack

Ozzy
20th Feb 2004, 20:00
Yo' Mammas so fat she has a high risk of suffering myocardial infarction or atrial fribrillation if she does not reduce her calorific intake and engage in regular daily exercise.

Herr Ozzy:E

Parapunter
20th Feb 2004, 20:43
...she's got her own MP

...she put's her belt on with a boomerang

...last time she went to the beach, Greenpeace tried to push her back in the water...:{

Onan the Clumsy
20th Feb 2004, 20:46
when she sits around the house...she sits AROUND the house

topcat450
20th Feb 2004, 21:27
Yo Mamma's so fat when she goes to macdonalds, they ask her what she don't want.

Yo Mamma's so fat when she wears high heels, she strikes oil with every step.

Frogbox
21st Feb 2004, 02:28
Slight adjustment but...

Yo Mamma's so hairy her armpits look like she got Don King in a headlock.

airship
21st Feb 2004, 02:43
Yo Mamma's so fat that the Faroe Islanders are waiting by the pool. :ugh:

And wondering where the rest of the family are lurking...:{

signeti
21st Feb 2004, 03:23
yo mama's so fat i burned my ass off the lightbulb while i was giving her one....:yuk:

henry crun
21st Feb 2004, 04:01
Nasa are sending up a rocket to photograph the other side of her.

RowleyUK
21st Feb 2004, 05:04
Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell!

twilightsglow
21st Feb 2004, 05:04
Yo mama's so fat, everytime she turns around it's her birthday.

airship
21st Feb 2004, 05:08
Yo mama's so fat that you have to keep those wing mirrors on even when you're not towing the caravan.

Techchick
21st Feb 2004, 05:09
My friend, when we were 6 years old, said my mum was as fat as a pig, but that her mum was fatter than a pig:} :} :}

airship
21st Feb 2004, 05:16
Yo mama's so fat that Airbus are bringing out a single -deck version of the A380.

moo
21st Feb 2004, 06:11
yo momma so old she used to gang bang with the hebrews.

yo momma so ugly that when she was younger her mom had to tie a piece of meat around her neck just to get the dog to play with her.

Your momma got more chin's than a chinese phone book.

Your momma so fat i bet i can cut her glands open and bleed chocolate milk.

Your momma so old she took her drivers license on a dinosaur.

yo mamma's so old the milk in her tits turned to cheese

yo momma's so fat that when she wanted to sit down she had to ask for planning permission

yo momma's so old she drives chariots to school

yo momma's tits are so hairy we all thought they were coconuts

yo momma's so slutty she has been engaged more times than bt

yo momma's like a tortoise when she is on her back she is ****ed

yo momma's so fat when left the beach they shouted the coast is clear

yo momma's so fat, she's on BOTH sides of the family

yo momma's so dumb, she got fired from a blow job

yo momma's so heavy, she went out in stilletto heels and struck oil

Your mommas glasses are so thick when she looks on a map she can see people waving!

Your mommas glasses are so thick she can see into the future!

yo mumma's so fat she fell in the grand canyon and filled it up

yo mumma's so ugly that when she was a baby they had to put tinted glass around her incubator

yo momma's like a gas station i pay, she pumps

yo momma's so ugly when she went into a haunted house she came out with a paycheck

yo momma's so dumb she heard christmas was round the corner and she went looking for it

yo momma's so fat when she went to Thope park and waited in line they said one at a time please

yo momma's so fat when she walked passed i missed the bus

yo momma's so fat that when i was watching tv she walked past and i missed 3 episodes.

yo momma's so fat, she's on BOTH sides of the family

yo momma's so dumb, she got fired from a blow job

yo momma's so old, I told the bitch to act her age and she dropped dead

yo momma's so heavy, she went out in stilletto heels and struck oil

Yo momma so ugly, she look like her face caught fire and yo family tried to put it out with forks..!!

yo mommas like a double decker bus, 40p to get on top

yo mommas like a boomerang, ****'er chuck'er and she still comes back for more

yo mommas so fat she stepped on the scales and they read "to be continued..."

yo mommas so fat she jumped in the sea and the sea jumped out

yo mommas so stupid she got locked in a toilet and pissed herself

yo mommas so stupid she got locked in Asdas and she starved

yo mommas so fat she stepped on the sales and the scales read "i want your weight not your phone number"

Yo mommas so fat she wakes up in sections

Yo mommas so lanky she did a cartwhell and kicked Jesus

Yo mammas like a bowling ball, she gets fingered 3 times then comes back for more

Yo mammas a tv set ,she gets turned on by black knobs

More people have been up your mum than the M1.

Yo momma so ugly that they threw away the baby and kept the afterbirth.

Yo momma so fat, she got a job as The Michelin Man's stunt double.

Yo momma wears army boots.

Yo momma house so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies!

Yo momma so flat she's jealous of the wall!

Yo momma got so many teeth missing, it looks like her tongue is in jail.

Yo momma so bald you can see whats on her mind.

Yo momma so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.

Yo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.

Yo momma like a screen door, after a couple bangs she tends to loosen up!

Yo momma like the pillbury doughboy - everyone gets a poke!

Yo momma like a doorknob - everyone gets a turn!

Yo momma like a T.V. set, even a three year old can turn her on!

Yo momma like a tomato sauce bottle, everyone gets a squeeze!

Yo momma like a rifle... four cocks and she's loaded.

Yo momma like a hardware store: 10p a screw!

Yo momma like a refrigerator: everyone likes to put their meat in her!

Yo momma like a bus: Guys climb on and off her all day long.

Yo momma like a bubble-gum machine... 10p a blow.

Yo momma so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone.

Yo momma so grouchy, the McDonalds she works in doesn't even serve Happy Meals

Yo momma mouth so big, she speaks in surround sound.

Yo momma so old her social security number is 1.

Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.

Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention

Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers

Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"

Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.

Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her drivers licence

Yo momma so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.

Yo momma so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.

Yo momma so slutty she could suck-start a Harley

Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl

Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money

Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight

Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo momma so ugly she made an onion cry.

Yo momma teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles

Yo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop

Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions

Yo momma so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!

Yo momma so fat that when her pager goes off people thinks shes backing up!

Yo momma so old she owes Jesus a quid!

Yo momma so fat she got her own post code!

Yo momma wears Brut!

Yo momma so fat that when I swerved my car to avoid running her over I ran out of petrol!

Yo momma so fat that people run around her for exercise!

Yo momma so fat that when I was ****ing her I burnt my arse on the light bulb!

Yo momma so fat that when I finished ****ing her I had to roll over 3 times to get off the bitch!

Yo momma so stupid she sits on the tv and watches the couch!

Yo momma so fat and stupid the last time she saw 90210 was on her wieght scales!

Yo momma got summer teeth. Summer teeth go this way. Summer teeth go that way.

Yo momma grill so messed up she got a sign in her mouth that say next tooth 1 mile.

Yo momma so fat she jumped in the sea and all the whales started singing "We are family"

Yo momma so nasty, she takes off her drawers and the police issue gas masks.

Yo momma so ugly, she has to wear TWO paper bags when she goes out.

Yo momma so stupid she saw a sign that said "wet floor" so she did!

Yo momma so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a phone company

Yo momma so stupid it took her an hour to cook 3 minute rice

Yo momma's so fat she sat on a rainbow and made skittles!!!

Yo momma is so fat she can sell shade.

airship
21st Feb 2004, 06:23
That's it, far too much to handle in 1 sitting. I'm going to bed. :ugh:

Bre901
21st Feb 2004, 06:28
Airship

loved your A380 one ! :p :p

flyby_kiwi
21st Feb 2004, 11:05
........I had to roll over twice just to get on top of her :E

Jerricho
21st Feb 2004, 19:46
Yo mammas so fat, if you looked fat up in the dictionary you just see a picture of her.

Fitzy
22nd Feb 2004, 09:20
Ya Mama's so fat her blood group's Dolmio :D

MMEMatty
22nd Feb 2004, 20:43
Yo Mommas so fat she makes free willy look like a Tic-Tac

Matty

Jerricho
23rd Feb 2004, 01:26
Yo' mammas so fat, she does't for a walk, she goes for a roll.

Lily Rowan
23rd Feb 2004, 04:01
Yo’ mama’s so fat, it takes her two trips to haul @ss.

fly babe
23rd Feb 2004, 06:42
yo mummas so fat, at school she sat next to everrry body!

Power Up
24th Feb 2004, 02:58
yo mamas so fat, when she goes into a room, she gets to sit next to everybody

simon brown
25th Feb 2004, 20:58
Yo mommas so fat that when she bends over, shes got an arse like 2 badly parked Beetles