View Full Version : Rewards for Despots

31st Oct 2001, 01:40
Somebody said:

(snipped a bit)
"Due to the almost impossible ...I have decided that there will be no more p... or r... discussed on the w... You may consider this decision despotic and you may be right but then who gave you a vote? All current threads that I consider to be ......
Being a despot has its rewards"

That set me thinking, on a quiet evening. What rewards do despots normally get?

I can think of Caesar: (knife in ribs; "infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me"), Mussolini: (hung upside down in benzina station) Napoleon: (Wallpaper poisoning (?)) Hitler: (shot self, burned by guards), Oliver Cromwell, Pol Pot, Papa Doc, Franco, and many others: (died in own bed).

What will happen to our local despot?


edited for the usual :mad: typo

[ 30 October 2001: Message edited by: Unwell_Raptor ]

31st Oct 2001, 01:44
I predict a very messy end....an overdose of Ovaltine at least.

tony draper
31st Oct 2001, 01:54
You forgot the Hag, she was made a baroness. ;)

31st Oct 2001, 02:08
what exactly is a despot :confused: :confused:

tony draper
31st Oct 2001, 02:16
Its a central location,main stores/ headquarters ect, as in Catterick is a Army Despot. ;)

31st Oct 2001, 10:35
Ah Tony D, you naughty boy. Leading poor dingducky on like that. I am sure that you know that despot really means - that place right there. As in - "put that furniture down in despot right here". :cool:

dAAvid -

31st Oct 2001, 10:54
Actually it's an ancient mariner's curse that has become contracted into one word over the years.

I believe the original was "Blind Pugh sends you the black spot."

Since there was only one kind of spot ever sent i.e. the black one, it was considered unnecessary to include the adjective and the phrase then became "Blind Pugh sends you the spot."

After it became a popular curse in various other countries such as Ireland, Italy, America etc, the "th" sound became corrupted to "d" and the more familiar "Blind Pugh sends you de spot." was heard around the traps.

From that point it was a very short hop to a general shortening of the entire phrase to today's well known "De spot."

Not many people know that!

:D :D :D

31st Oct 2001, 13:02
Despot; n, to remove or eradicate a spot of an unspecified nature. (de-spot, corruption by removal of hyphen, probably origin American, by removal of the hyphen)

31st Oct 2001, 13:37
Despot is what we put decream on.

Despot is what we cook dedinner in.


31st Oct 2001, 15:46

Despot as opposed to datpot??

Tricky Woo
31st Oct 2001, 18:55
Hi All,

We had a brief discussion at lunch today as to whether it's unsafe to be a dictator. The conclusion is that the majority of the 20th Century's dictators died contentedly of old age:

Salazar (Chile)
Salazar (Portugal)
Pol Pot


There's still quite of a list of living dictators, who seem to be having a nice time p!ssing off the Yanks:

Fidel Castro
Saddam Hussein


The list of dictators that came to a nasty end is somewhat short:

...Er, that's about it.


Our conclusion was that the megalomaniacs of this world (Not me, honest) can confidently take on the mantle of unelected ruler, as the odds are with us... er, them.

If only my school Career Advisor had told me this... it would have saved a lot of time.


Mac the Knife
1st Nov 2001, 00:22
A boring JB with inane trivia, coy badinage, facetious jokes, playground smut and kitten-fluff.

1st Nov 2001, 00:35

You forgot the famous Romanian dictator Ceaucescu, he was captured and shot (100 bullets from a machine gun just to make sure) along with his wife on Xmas day 1989!!!


1st Nov 2001, 02:14
I think this despot just needs a good spanking to sort him out. Although, I think he would enjoy that..... ;)

1st Nov 2001, 03:56
And how did you form that opinion, Ms. Snail?

:D :D

1st Nov 2001, 05:46
I think that's misspelt. It should be D-spot, which is the fourth of the seven main erogenous zones, lettered for ease of usage from the A-spot to the G-spot.

1st Nov 2001, 14:39
So does no-one know what a despot is? :confused:

I too am curious as to the meaning of this word, but it seems as though nobody is willing (or able) to divulge an answer. Come on people, that's what a site like this is for!!

henry crun
1st Nov 2001, 15:39
Despot: 1.an autocratic ruler, a tyrant.
2.any autocratic or domineering person.
3.a Greek title borne by Byzantine emperors and princes, by Christian rulers in the Balkans under the Turks, and by Eastern Orthodox bishops

1st Nov 2001, 15:50
Danny is an Eastern Orthodox Bishop?? :confused:

tony draper
1st Nov 2001, 15:52
Ha! we all knew that, we all knew that I tell you.
except Ding, ;)

1st Nov 2001, 16:26
well i am just a sweet innocent young girly :o

Tricky Woo
1st Nov 2001, 18:04
Hi All,

Hmm, I forgot about Ceaucescu. Still, I reckon that only the first bullet hurt, the rest were (ahem) overkill. Good news that they shot his ugly wife, though.

I was reading Machiavelli's 'The Prince' recently, and he seems to think that becoming (and staying) a despot is an absolute doddle, as long as one keeps a few things in mind. Something about not doing a deal with the King of France, nor the Pope for that matter.

Meanwhile, I'm rather stuck on the first requirement for a proto-despot: which country should I despotise (don't even ask, Dingy).

Some sod has already bagged my first choice, Singapore. All the obvious ones have been done, so I reckon I'm going to have to look further afield. I also fancy somewhere with a nice climate, so that rather counts out Finland. Shame that, 'cos I reckon the Finnish have gotten away with far too much self-rule over the last century or so.

Any suggestions?


2nd Nov 2001, 07:29
Tricky how bout Belize , not too big so the big guys wont bother you , reasonable climate although they do have the occasional hurricane. Good seafood and I believe a population not known for hanging or shooting despots. Could try St Pierre and Michelon off newfieland but the climate is less inviting and the population all speak french.

2nd Nov 2001, 08:14
henry c -

Those first two definitions fit my better half perfectly. ;)

So - she is a despot, I see. :D

dAAvid -

Tricky Woo
2nd Nov 2001, 15:22
Hi All,

On reflection, I've chosen Cuba.

Think about it: as soon as Castro snuffs it, which can't be too far into the future, the distraught Cubans will immediately cast about for someone of his ilk... that's when Tricky Woo will kindly step in. Hooray!

As soon as I take over, I'll organise a press conference where I'll state categorically that from now on Cuba and the US will be the bestest mates in the whole wide world.

Then BIG American aid in the form of BIG American money will come flooding over the sea from Miami. Mine, all mine, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.


Seeing as the Yanks have a great track record in propping up Southern and Central American dictators, I don't see how this can fail. Within a fortnight of taking over I'll be a billionaire; have four large palaces; 'dance the salsa' with lots of beautiful Cuban girls; and smoke great big Cuban cigars

Hmm... mental reminder: no point in stopping smoking now.

Furthermore, now that we're all going to be chums, the Yanks'll legalise both Cuban cigars and Cuban tourism. Yet more money will flood into the country, generating wealth and prosperity amongst my people. Hence, I'll be the most popular dictator in the history of Mankind. Not too bad, huh?

I won't shoot many people, either; I'm nice like that.

Fidel Woo