View Full Version : The Premiership

30th Oct 2001, 18:42
So ITV have finally bitten the bullet and moved The Premiership back to a sensible time. It's a big loss of face, but they might be able to salvage the situation - and save a bit of money into the bargain. How? By getting the football team to present those early evening favourites. Early leaked ideas include:

Blind Date. Ally McCoist asks, "Number three: have you got any Glaswegian in you? Would you like some?"

This Is My Moment. Lucky punters get the chance to fulfil their life's ambition - a brief, swooning chat with Des Lynam (Suggested by Mister D Lynam of Surrey).

Touch The Truck. A job-seeking Andy Townsend takes his truck round the BBC, Sky, Eurosport and the sports departments of various crappo digital channels, but sadly, no-one will touch it.

You've Been Framed. Hilarious slapstick show where Terry Venables guides you through his courtroom mishaps - blaming that pesky Alan Sugar for all the calamities.

Surprise, Surprise. Members of the public are tearfully reunited with long-lost relations, although their joy is somewhat curtailed when Clive Tyldesley keeps interrupting their joyful celebrations to tell them how great it was seeing Manchester United win the European Cup in Barcelona.

Popstars. Bob Wilson stars as Nasty Bob, the cruel presenter who laughingly ruins loads of young hopefuls' dreams of watching a decent programme.

It'll Be Alright On The Night. Gabby Logan presents the return of the much-loved series of blunders, giggling and incompetence. Stars featured include Gabby Logan, Gabrielle Yorath-Logan and Gabby Logan (nee Yorath).

Blind Date