View Full Version : Why didn't someone invent.........?

24th Oct 2001, 23:55
Let me start it........

Why didn't someone invent black talcum powder for coloured people??

Pooh coloured nappies/diapers for babies?

25th Oct 2001, 00:49
Why didn't you do it? ;)

25th Oct 2001, 10:00
Liquor filled doughnuts

Travelling Toolbox
25th Oct 2001, 10:36
That device so often spoken about in a pub, you know the one - when you touch her shoulder - her pants fall down :D :D :D

Ow! Ow! stop kicking me missus, it's only a joke.

tony draper
25th Oct 2001, 12:19
Why don't they build all roads with a slight downhill tilt, it would be good for the envoirement, we would us less oil, vehicles could free wheel for large parts of their journeys given a gravitational assist.

25th Oct 2001, 14:37
Mr Draper, I think the roads around these parts are already built like you say, especially in the mornings. It really seems that when I am driving to work, that it is downhill all the way. :D

....anyway, has anybody invented an artificial snot ball, just to keep those people with clean noses entertained until the weather changes??

25th Oct 2001, 18:06
Too busy doing other things Sweety, but with your help I am sure I could...........

Bird Strike
25th Oct 2001, 21:34
Noiseless, vibrationless dentist's drill. That noise really winds me up! So does the vibration from it... in fact can't they just invent something that prevents tooth decay in the first place, like a special coating for teeth? Oh that would put all the dentists out of business doesn't it? Maybe someone can then invent a new job for dentists...

26th Oct 2001, 01:58
Latex gloves that don't stick to tape....

Honest I have a legitimate reason for this!!!

26th Oct 2001, 16:05
Bird Strike


26th Oct 2001, 16:20
Oooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh - the thought of AB in latex gloves... :eek: ;) :p

26th Oct 2001, 18:50
... and I wonder why AB needs the tape? :eek: Naughty, naughty AB ... :D

bubba zanetti
26th Oct 2001, 20:11
You just wear the latex gloves inside out, the talc does a fine enough job of not sticking, especially with electricians tape, less well with duct tape though ... er, ah .. at least in my experience that is ... :o

26th Oct 2001, 21:17

It's the duck I feel sorry for :eek:

bubba zanetti
26th Oct 2001, 22:44
Indeed Grainger, any duckie trussed up like that ... whew!
I always try and be the trussor and not the trussee ... so to speak. :eek:

27th Oct 2001, 04:03
Would some bastard please invent the round tuit? I cant get anything done until I get one of those bloodey things.

27th Oct 2001, 14:09
Strange as it may seem, Mycroft and I know where you could lay your hands on a Round Tuit. I'll let him explain (if he's brave enough).

Suffice to say, I was of late considering changing my name to "Inverse Sherlock". Only the slightly cryptic or criminally insane will work that one out!

DHC Twin
27th Oct 2001, 16:18
...A Lager van delivery service for when one is just too pissed to drive (this is ofcourse a joke and would never happen).


27th Oct 2001, 17:50
Slash, if you manage to lay your hands on a sypply, would you please DHL 2 of them linea recta to the Polar Circle??

Teenage Flappers in dire need of them, getting Round Tuit being the last bl*ddy thing on their hormone adled brains,ever! :mad:

Unless it concerns anything having to do with the computer, their mobile phones, atonal music or the frigging telly of course.
No Round Tuits needed then. :rolleyes:

No need to send same for Mr40 & I.
We manage. :D

27th Oct 2001, 17:54
i have seen a round tuit
my aunt had one :)

27th Oct 2001, 20:45
Hey baz, looks like ding's just solved the problem over who she is (well reduced the probabilities a bit)

28th Oct 2001, 09:03

am i not a woman of mystery anymore? :(

28th Oct 2001, 10:30
I heard some Round Tuits this weekend, but there was no way I could see one though because they were chased away by the dreaded Hop Tuits

Round Tuit? (http://www.funkypages.com/roundtuit/circle.gif)

28th Oct 2001, 16:08
In a rare moment of inspiration, my firm got in a stock of round tuits some years ago. My coffee mug sits on one but other than that it's a singularly useless piece of kit.

I Am Ugly
28th Oct 2001, 17:36
Why didn't someone invent...

A quick release bra. With a one handed pull tab.

This would make me a very happy man. Very happy. ;)

30th Oct 2001, 17:10
Sod the quick release thing - Make 'em out of velcro!

31st Oct 2001, 02:28
i would have thought that you guys would wish that the bra had never been invented at all ;)

31st Oct 2001, 09:49
Bras I can deal with. I need somebody to invent anti-beer goggles, no matter how much you drink, that troll at the bar stays as ugly as ever.

2nd Nov 2001, 02:49
dingducky - I am glad they were invented, after all the journey to get to where you want to go is a valuable part of the overall experience and a bra is just one more step in the journey to overcome!!

Joe Bolt
3rd Nov 2001, 01:34
And if it wasn't for the bra making the final destination look far more inviting than it often is, you might not bother beginning the journey in the first place.