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View Full Version : The Monster Raving Loony Party is back


Velvet
22nd May 2001, 15:18
Yes it's true, they are back and I wish we had one in my constituency, if we do I think I just might vote for them. You just gotta luv 'em. :)

Taken from the BBC Website:
Monster Raving Loony Party leader Alan "Howling Laud" Hope (Mayor has entered the election race. He was joined on the election campaign trail by his trusty joint leader ginger tabby Cat-Mandu. Mr Hope won a council seat in Ashburton and was named mayor for a second term in May 1999.

The party's 2001 campaign calls for those sitting the driving test to be able to phone one friend, take a 50:50 choice of route or ask the other drivers in the traffic jam for advice.

He told BBC News Online that one of his first acts as prime minister would be to make Britain a tax haven.

And the party would restrict all under-21 drivers to Reliant Robins and 2CVs to stop 'boy racers'.

Its manifesto promises to reduce class sizes by making children stand closer together and by making desks smaller.

"All bus shelters will have central heating. This will be turned on full in summer and off in the winter, just like the buses," its transport policy says.

Hunting would not be banned but it would be made fairer - the loonies would only allow one dog per fox.

Other policies from their Manifesto:
Free university tuition for students named Grant. Supporting Man Utd will be made a criminal offence for people born south of Crewe. The national anthem will be replaced with 'Do the Funky Gibbon,' by the Goodies



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How do you explain to a caterpillar that it can become a butterfly, and will, regardless of its current belief system.

18Wheeler
22nd May 2001, 15:29
WHERE DO I SIGN UP???
Love it!

Tartan Gannet
22nd May 2001, 16:10
If they were standing in Reading West Id vote for them. As an alurophile anyone with a moggie called Cat Mandu as co Leader has to be on a winner. As it is I will have to vote Tory to held get rid of one of Blair's placemen and puppets.

[This message has been edited by Tartan Gannet (edited 22 May 2001).]

Charlie Foxtrot India
22nd May 2001, 17:27
Used to live near Ashburton when it had a Monster Raving Looney mayor. Funny place, but those were uni days and everything was funny or blurry then...

Screaming Lord Such RIP. General elections must be so boring over there these days. No wonder hardly anyone votes.

foghorn
22nd May 2001, 17:28
www.omrlp.com (http://www.omrlp.com)

VOTE LOONY!

Unwell_Raptor
22nd May 2001, 17:52
I am afraid that the Monster Loonies have been out-loonied by the Tories.

How do you produce a crazier crew than Widdecombe Hague and the Portillistas?

What chance has satire when real life can come up with that lot?

Loki
22nd May 2001, 22:18
TG

If I`m not mistaken the MP in question is Martin Salter. How can you call him one of Blairs placemen after his stirling efforts to try and prevent the privatisation of ATC in the UK? I met the fellow outside the Savacentre on Saturday and had quite a nice chat with him. It`s true that I wouldn`t vote for him if I lived in his constituency, as I belong to another party, but he seemed a decent bloke to me.

Charlie Foxtrot India
23rd May 2001, 07:20
Anyone remember the Slightly Silly party, with candidate Kevin Philips "Bong" or the Very Silly party with Tarquin Fim Tim Bim Lim F'tang F'tang Ole Biscuit Barrell?

I remember a local election in London where the famous Madam Cynthia Payne was representing "The Payne and Pleasure Party" Whatever happened to them? Perhaps she formed a coalition with the tories? They probably had a lot in common...

Blacksheep
23rd May 2001, 09:21
I enjoyed the joke in Ruislip a few years ago when the Monster Raving Looney candidate retained his deposit while the Labour candidate lost his. There were a lot of 'sensible' people in Ruislip back then, most of us at RAF Northolt of course...

**********************************
Through difficulties to the cinema

Tartan Gannet
23rd May 2001, 14:36
Loki, your are spot on, that is the man.

I will take great pleasure in voting for his Tory opponent on 7th June in the hope of unseating him. In am marginal seat that is one way to make my vote count against Blair.

Why? Sure Martin Salter is a charmer as you found out at Savacentre. He is all things to all men. In the prole part of his seat such as the Whitley Council Estate, Martin is clad in jeans and polo shirt and drops the register of his speech. If in Tory well to do Pangbourne then its collar and tie and suit and appropriate diction.

Yes, he opposed the sell off of ATC and has either voted against or abstained in votes on cutting benefits etc. However, he is in print in the local paper as saying "Blair is Labour's best leader, that's why I voted for him at the Leadership elections". He has also been a junior member of the government team in Ulster and unlike REAL traditionalist Old Labour figures such as Andrew Mackay, Bob Marshall Andrews, Gordon Prentice, Paul Flynn, Gwyneth Dunwoody, Ann and John Cryer, etc has never strayed that far from the official line.

To my mind therefore he is as much an "On Message Blairite" as most of the New Labour MPs elected in 1997. I voted for him and displayed his poster in my window last time, but NEVER AGAIN!

foghorn
23rd May 2001, 14:43
The best silly party I've heard of was in the eighties, where there was a candidate who stood for the "Rainbow Alliance: Beer, Fags and Skittles".

Slightly off the wall... made me laugh :) :)

Nil nos tremefacit
24th May 2001, 00:20
Sad to relate, but the days of the one man political party (Bill Boak) have been killed off by miserable politicians with no sense of humour. To stand for election now you must belong to an accredited political party (they do checks) or as an Independent. What you can no longer do is pay your deposit, think of any old name and get yourself onto the ballot paper.

This has succeeded in removing the Literal Democrats and the Conversative Party from ballot papers. The theory being that the electorate were confused and voted for mavericks instead of mainstream parties. To be honest, if you've turned up at the polling station and don't know who is standing then it serves you right if you can't be @rsed to read the ballot paper properly!

Incidentally, the future is bleaker still - there is a move afoot in Europe to ban political parties that are opposed to the constitution of the European Union. Some of the most fanatical pro-Europeans would ban the Conservative Party from standing. :mad:

Teenyweeny ATC Cdt Cpl
24th May 2001, 22:59
Go buy a copy of the Times today, & look in the "Election 2001" supplement at the list of candidates...
...the "Jam Wrestling" party gets my vote!!
-tacc