View Full Version : Mixed metaphors

27th Aug 2001, 18:21
Well, we all know that you can't let sleeping dogs lie once you have let the cat out of the bag...

... but have you realised that if you're skating on thin ice, you are likely to get your fingers burned ???

27th Aug 2001, 21:20
Bob's your uncle just so long as you take the bull by the horns and strike willy nilly while the iron is hot, since there's many a slip between a rock and a hard place...

27th Aug 2001, 23:06
Somebody once said to me while we were talking of a devious bloke, "I wouldn't trust him as far as I could stab him in the back"!

Time Bomb Ted
28th Aug 2001, 09:52
You don't know what you don't know!
So if you don't know something, just ask.
Unless you don't know that you don't know something, then you wouldn't have asked in the first place.

Dr Jekyll
28th Aug 2001, 11:42
"You can't teach an old dog to change its spots in mid stream."

Or a a great one I heard from someone on TV trying to make a serious comment about NHS reforms.

"If Nye bevan were alive today he would be turning in his grave."

[ 28 August 2001: Message edited by: Dr Jekyll ]

29th Aug 2001, 00:46
I got caught with my hand in my trousers... or was that my trousers in the cookie jar? Whatever, still waiting for the cows to come home to roost.

29th Aug 2001, 19:51
pale as a goat
white as a sheep

Biggles Flies Undone
29th Aug 2001, 20:07
Keep your ear to the ground, nose to the grindstone and shoulder to the wheel - then try working in that position.

P.S. AerBabe - I'll have a pint of whatever you're on :D

You want it when?
29th Aug 2001, 20:08
Marginally off topic (again I know, sorry)

Roberts your fathers brother
And your point is?
(response to the above is "just beyond your grasp")
He was a fairy, his name is nuff. Fairy Nuff.
Well that's a small onion (as in shallot, as in that's your lot (why do I bother))

If someone ever asks you "What did your last slave die of?"
I've found "Insubordination" a good answer.

On topic:
If you fall off that wall and break your leg, don't come running to me!
If life gives you lemons, find some gin ASAP.
Red sky in the moring shepards warning, red sky at night - too late.

:D :D :D :D :D

29th Aug 2001, 20:11
YWIW - what r u on mate?


29th Aug 2001, 20:12
Nah mate.
Red sky at night, yer engine's alight.

You want it when?
29th Aug 2001, 20:18
FFF - Deep depression,
Approaching another year older,
Slightly less bolder,
Prehaps a little colder.

Stuck in a dead end job,
Bloody awful commute,
And I still can't land a C150

Otherwise no wucking furries.

YWIW in dire need of a beer before he faces RailTrack again :D Retiring to the Witness Box for some attitiude adjustment.

[ 29 August 2001: Message edited by: You want it when? ]

Hagbard the Amateur
29th Aug 2001, 23:22
Never whistle while you're pi55ing...

And congratulations to George W Bu5h for inventing the word "misunderestimate."

30th Aug 2001, 04:21
You've cooked your goose and now you've got to lie in it.

A little off the topic:

There once was a man named Scott.
Hard to rhyme with it isn't.

30th Aug 2001, 04:27
How about the famour Aussie rugby commentator Rex Mossop... " He's the best player of all time in future years to come"

30th Aug 2001, 18:01
Noticed a few digressors creeping in here; watch out guys! - 'cos if you try to change horses in midstream, you'll get stuck up a gum tree without a paddle. :o

Top Loadie
31st Aug 2001, 01:53
"..that way you can kill two birds with one throw of the dice!"
"I don't like to blow my own drum" (Or should that be bang my own trumpet?)
(Digressing again)
"I spoke to ***** by fax last night!"
Copyright [email protected]

tony draper
31st Aug 2001, 02:03
A hand in the birds bush is worth two,errr never mind.

Drop and Stop
31st Aug 2001, 03:53
Does the pope sh!t in the woods?

1st Sep 2001, 14:33
If you dig a hole for someone else, the monkey will come out of the sleeve ?

1st Sep 2001, 16:21
Are bears Catholic?


A hod is as good as a sink to a kind Norse.

[ 01 September 2001: Message edited by: Loki ]

Doctor Cruces
1st Sep 2001, 20:42
Downstream without a caonoe.

A case of Deja Vu on the other foot.

Bally Heck
1st Sep 2001, 21:20
Some people getting of thread here. Arwave that was a colemanball. Way off topic and as for you Loki, well that is a spoonerism as clear as day. This thread is about mixed metaphors. Be having malapropisms on here if we're not careful. Watch your speech impediments chaps.

1st Sep 2001, 21:33
A bird in the hand is worth two songs by Kate Bush.

tony draper
1st Sep 2001, 22:30
I have difficulty saying the word "Filming", I have to think hard before I say it, don't know why.
Had a pal who couldn't say "Melodramatic", he used to say "Melomadratic",
He also used to say "Birninham", instead of "Birmingham", he was arrested in Birningham for being Melomadratic.
Everyone has at least one word they have difficulty pronouncing.
Its suprising how many people say imput instead of input.
Hmmm, life is strange isn't it. :rolleyes:

[ 01 September 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]

2nd Sep 2001, 03:06
Where there's smoke, there's mirrors.

2nd Sep 2001, 03:51
In answer to the question, Catholics do sh*t in the woods when necessary.

Time Bomb Ted
4th Sep 2001, 08:02
Americans have the right to bear arms and;
the right to arm bears!!!!!

Don D Cake
4th Sep 2001, 14:53
Don't rest on your laurels before they've hatched.

Off topic:

"I have never seen such a terrible defeat," said Rummenigge, who spearheaded the German attack in the 1980s and is now a leading official at European champions Bayern Munich. "This was a new Waterloo for us."

Er, anyone remember Germany's old Waterloo?

4th Sep 2001, 17:33
Better watch out going off topic. :o

You'd be jumping out of the frying pan into the fire and you'll end up in hot water. That would just fan the flames, you'd be all at sea and finally hauled over the coals before sinking without a trace... :D

4th Sep 2001, 17:41
Er... Don de Cake. The Germans were at Waterloo. A good job for Wellington that they were ('Pray God, bring me darkness or bring me Blucher.'). There's nothing new in the NATO concept.


Keep your shoulder to the grindstone and your nose to the wheel.

Tricky Woo
4th Sep 2001, 17:51
Quite right: Those were the good old days when Brits and Krauts would happily team up to beat the living daylights out of the Froggies.

Went a bit wrong last century.


6th Sep 2001, 10:43
I've always thought that a fool and his money is a friend indeed! :D