PDA

View Full Version : Outrageous Headlines


wheels up
10th Dec 2001, 01:40
Some years ago the Times ran a competition to see who could come up with the most outrageous headline. The winning entry was for a newspaper dated 1919 with the headline "FRANS FERDINAND FOUND ALIVE". Anyone care to try and better that?

tony draper
10th Dec 2001, 01:52
London bus found on the Moon.
Think that was the sunday sport. ;)

BRL
10th Dec 2001, 02:03
JOHN HOLMES IS DEAD.

Front page of the Sun, sometime in the 80's......

Skycop
10th Dec 2001, 02:13
Osama Bin Laden found playing rear half of camel in "Aladdin" in Sheffield theatre pantomime. :D

Davaar
10th Dec 2001, 02:17
The Canadian journalist Fotheringham tells of the competition to produce an outrageous headline. It was around Christmas, and a man named Oliver had recently been murdered with a sharp weapon. The proposed headline ran: "They decked the halls with b*lls of Olly".

fantom
10th Dec 2001, 02:23
before 'new labour'(years before most of you were born) michael foot was promoted minister of defence.the headline was:
'foot heads arms body'.
do I win?

Loki
10th Dec 2001, 02:45
"Bishop in sex change mercy dash to palace"

pigboat
10th Dec 2001, 06:14
Davaar, the runner-up was by the same guy, "You should have seen Oliver Twist."

The National Post reviewed the movie "Nora Barnacle," about James Joyces' mistress, on the same day they did the review of "Pearl Harbour." The cut line read "Nora! Nora! Nora!" :D

henry crun
10th Dec 2001, 06:38
After a madman escaped from an asylum, broke into a laundry and raped one of the female employees.
"Nut bolts and screws washer"

Rollingthunder
10th Dec 2001, 07:04
"Is Franco still dead?"

compressor stall
10th Dec 2001, 10:59
What? This far and not one headline from the NT news? :eek:

Tricky Woo
10th Dec 2001, 14:01
English newspaper headline circa 1916: "Fog over Channel, Continent isolated".

Always liked that one.

TW

bush
10th Dec 2001, 14:20
After Gianno Versace was murdered outside his home:

"Shoot you sir" (ooh!)

HugMonster
10th Dec 2001, 14:39
One I always liked was, apparently, during the North Africa campaign of WW2 when a major advance by Montgomery cut off Rommel's forces. The headline ran:-

"Eight Army Push Bottles Up Germans"

OzExpat
10th Dec 2001, 15:00
A painful humiliation, if nothing else, Huggy! :eek:

gravity victim
10th Dec 2001, 15:06
What about last Friday's Times? A screamng front page headline: 'MULLAH OMAR IS CAPTURED'.

Total b*llocks, and they have not had the grace to apologise to readers for this epic journalistic screw-up. :mad:

gravity victim
10th Dec 2001, 15:09
HugMonster,

And of course'MONTGOMERY FLIES BACK TO FRONT'
:)

yaffel1
10th Dec 2001, 16:13
The Sun came out with "Super-Cally Go Ballistic, Celtic are Atrocious" after Celtic's defeat to Inverness Caledonian Thistle in the Scottish Cup. I'm pretty sure someone had done that before, but I can't remember who it was...?

Life of TrollyDollyLover
10th Dec 2001, 17:32
From that colossus of jornolistic endeavour, THE SUNDAY SPORT -
"WOMAN PREGNANT FOR 65 YEARS GIVES BIRTH TO A PENSIONER"

BigGreenPleasureMachine
10th Dec 2001, 19:36
here's one that was (sadly) never published.

in 1963 the IRA blew up Nelson's column in Dublin, and DeValera, still powerful enough to influence the (now defunct) Irish Press suggested the editor run the headline:

'English Admiral Leaves Dublin by Air'

the rat bag editor chickened out, boo, hiss...

BGPM;-)

Gainesy
10th Dec 2001, 20:49
The Sun, after England were beaten by Sweden in a soccer game;
SWEDES 2, TURNIPS 1

I think it was at the Times in the 50s that they had a "Who can write the most boring headline" competition, which produced;
Small earthquake in Chile, nobody dead

And a local paper in the UK ran;
Skeleton found dead on beach

tony draper
10th Dec 2001, 21:00
That bugg*r John Holmes did me out of a job in the movies, just cos he had a nicer smile than me, they picked him. ;)

[ 10 December 2001: Message edited by: tony draper ]