Here you go Tracey check out this site
https://www.jcb.com/en-us/about/rental
Go rent yourself a JCB.
You can even add qualified JCB driver to your CV.
I have e-mailed the Telegraph this afternoon asking for clarification on a quote from 2015. If I get a response I ill share :-)
I have also had a close look at the photos of the crash at Wilnslow. Nearest telegraph poles in the climbout are about 720metres beyond the 11 piano keys. WeeJeem's niggles in his EXCELLENT post really do not add up to produce a believable sequence of events, Ewald's page also states it was the contaminated fuel that dropped engine RPM.
I would be intrigued to see just what has come back from Deefer Dog's enquiries.