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Old 19th Dec 2009, 02:01
  #49 (permalink)  
Roger Sofarover
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: London
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Hans Mun.... and Wayne G...... carrying loads to build the G outposts. Their crewman was the Nav Paul Wess** (Brain the size of Jupiter but the last in the queue for common sense). Working all morning dropping loads direct off the hook then had to use an 8 ft Strop (point of note: there was a techie sitting in back of aircraft). The normal routine of the boys was 'them up front' zoom in drop load get 'clear 'from the crewman and f**k off sharpish. This time they go in with the first load on the strop. Paul Wess** forgets what the string is for at the end of the strop (light line), and not knowing what else to do with it ties it around his wrist!!!!!! The techie is not on headset but is already alarmed by the blatant act of stupidity. The boys go in and drop the load and are steadyish in the hovver waiting for the crewman to say 'clear, get the **** outta here', but silence! What they cannot see is Paul has been dragged down the load pole hatch and only his legs from the calf up remain inside. Paul cannot tell them as he cannot reach his mictel lead switch. Paul also knows that any second the boys are just gonna go and it is not going to be good. The arm and the day were saved by the techie who unstrapped and tapped Hans on the shoulder and pointed down the back. Hans just sees Pauls feet sticking out the loadpole hatch Mayday.

That evening Paul got very drunk, going around the mess saying 'I nearly died today" we then find him asleep in a similar bush to the one Shytorque slept in in the post above. He was so disgruntled that we woke him up that when we got him back in the porta cabin he ran out of his room with a brown sealed envelope (he was going back to Gut the next day). He waves the envelope in front of Hans and me and screams 'you see these Sofarover, these are my medical docs, and in the morning I am going to tell the SMO that you did this....", he then proceeded to tear up his entire medical history whilst laughing and cackling! Hans and I exchange a stare and then pi** ourselves laughing. Our hero was seen the next morning at 7am, on his knees on the floor in the corridor with blood red eyes trying to celleotape together the 100 pieces of paper in front of him muttering the words, 'why am I such a tw*t sometimes"
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