1. Bring in 100ml of finest single malt in your silly plastic bag.
2. When invited by the bottom-fondling failed wheelclamper to taste it, swig the lot.
3. Remove yourself from flying duty having been forced to drink alcohol before flying by the idiotic 'sickuriteh rools'.
4. Then go home for the day. But in a taxi.
5. Sue the ar$e off the ******* idiots for loss of flight pay, harassment and anything else you can think of.