Originally Posted by
stevef
I'm sure that's true in armed conflict and emergency service scenarios but perhaps there's too much nurturing of the satellites outside of those circumstances. There seems to be waves of false grief and vigils for victims of accidents and murders over the past ten or so years and to make it worse, the adults bring their young children along to lay flowers, cards and toys. That's going to affect them more than the actual death of a pupil or person they barely - or even never - knew. Kids are resilient and I don't think they should be dragged into the 'out-pourings' of grief when a simple explanation is all that's needed.
I've had the usual share of family, friend and acquaintance losses as well as seeing some early violent departures and never felt the need for subsequent group hugs, counselling and public displays of emotion. It's probably a generation thing although it's been going on for thousands of years.
Two good school friends of my age [15] died in separate tragedies. One was a marvellous all-round sportsman, both were achievers. There was no assembly to announce the deaths, [They "died", not "passed"] There was no overt grief. There was no counselling. That is how it was in 1951 or so.
Nothing to do with stiff upper lip, suppressed grief, PTSD. We talked a bit about the events for a few days and moved on.
The past is a foreign country, they do things differently there