ROE's will always have the inherent risk of National Strategic imperatives colliding with a tactical reality. Having been at both ends of the ROE chain I get the frustrations, but ROE is a not great solution to a problem where all the other alternatives are worse. Ultimately everyone who can deliver Lethal force has to take responsibility for that.
Personally I am OK with that because the alternative is what you see with the Russians in the Ukraine. I never want to be part of a Military that behaves like that, it is repulsive and obscene
Finally, I would suggest that ROE failures are ultimately leadership failures, primarily at the field grade level. As a LCdr I once pushed back all the way to the 2 star level to address what I considered inappropriate ROE. I didn't make too many friends but I got most of the relief I wanted and in the end there was a better understanding by senior leaders of the tactical reality at the ground level.