Jimmy H had been a FAC in Vietnam flying the push-pull Cessna on longish sorties. Inevitably, on one trip the local cuisine caught up with him, a touch of Motezumas Revenge, Jimmy managed to do the necessary into the rather natty bone dome bag then in use by the USAF. On landing, he left the bag outside whilst he went to tidy himself up, inevitably the bag was nicked. You can only imagine the miscreants expression when he proudly showed his family the latest acquisition.
At the bosses (KFGEM) for drinks, Boss and wife had a new baby. Jimmy picked the babe up and, as you do, lifted the child up to do the gootchy gootchy goo bit. Unfortunately, he lifted the babe too high and banged his head against the ceiling, much crying but fortunately no damage to baby or the plasterwork.
On posting back home, Jimmy wanted a particular slot at I believe Mountain Home, he had to send a photo with his request. A friend of his called him to ask if he really wanted the posting, if so send a new picture. Why? Well, your hair is much too long. Jimmy “ but I had it cut especially short”. Well said friend, you’ve been in the UK took long, get a USAF cut!