Listen to rudestuff.
Firstly, you are what you say you are. So if you say you are a failure, then you are a failure. If you say you are a success, then you are a success. We can’t help you validate your self worth, only you can do that.
Before, you do anything, save yourself a lot of time, money and effort and go see if you can get a Class 1 medical. You won’t be a comercial pilot without it.
Contrary to popular believe, pilots aren’t supermen. You don’t need to be Einstein to fly a plane. You just need to be dedicated and determined to do the study and get through the training. Generally, GCSE level education with a good understanding of mathematics should be enough to get you through training.
The industry isn’t winding up, nor is it ‘not what it used to be’. There are a lot of old farts who look back to their youth with rose tinted glasses and reminisce about what it was like to be a pilot in their day, often leaving out all the downsides. You will come across a lot of negativity in this industry and people who will tell you to not bother being a pilot. However, if you really want it you will stay focused and cut through the negativity.
As for how, when or where to train. Well that is up to you to decide. You need to research, research, research and pick the best route for YOU. All I can say is you don’t need anywhere near £100k to get your fATPL.
Good luck!