Terms and EndearmentThe forum the beancounters hoped would never happen. Your news on pay, rostering, allowances, extras and negotiations where you work. Let others in the industry make educated choices on where the grass is less brown! Scheduled, charter or contract -
I would like to open a thread for FR managers to read and implement revolutionary and modern ideas to cut costs , improve efficency and add value for our shareholders.
I will start with a couple of ideas that a colleague came up with a few days ago, you can all add yours and let's hope our wise managers will implement them:
1- closure of all crewrooms and briefings to be done directly on aircraft with paperwork printed by F/O on his own printer and paper back home before coming to the airport
2-duty could this way start 15 minutes before ETD
3-crew to buy and carry their own fire gloves,life vests,PBE,crash axe and BCF bottle
4-loadsheets to be done on a re-usable plastic sample and then signed copy sent to dispatcher with an MMS from Capt.'s own phone
5-weight loss campaign to be launched amongst crews with minimum loss 10 kilos in 6 months in order to lower average standard weights and allow more payload
Your turn guys now, let's make this airline a better workplace!!
Earth to dannyalliga... earth to dannyalliga... come in dannyalliga. Hello!!!! anyone home? April Fools Day is still five months away. I love it though!
If the process ain't broken... then don't fix it. Oh wait... this may be the next standard for crews.
Last edited by captjns : 3rd November 2009 at 07:03.
1- closure of all crewrooms and briefings to be done directly on aircraft with paperwork printed by F/O on his own printer and paper back home before coming to the airport
This could cause problems for the one or two RYR F/Os who for some unknown reason prefer to sleep in their cars in the staff car park at Dublin airport prior to their 04:30 check ins. God knows its difficult enough to have an 'Aussie Wash' in the back seat of a 03 Nissan Micra without having to wrestle with a frozen printer cartridge.....
Keep up the good work though, and keep them coming.....
We seem to have run out of cost saving ideas, so heres another one....
Charge the employees for uniforms and items of essential safety wear (high viz jackets, wet weather gear, safety shoes etc). Although technically these measures would be in clear breach of current employment and health and safety legislation, these laws could be circumvented by inserting them as clauses in the employment contract so that any pitential employee can have the option to sign away their legal entitlements in exchange for a job......
Being Ryanair, its not like anyone will ever have the cojones to stand up and challenge it or anything......
Try to recruit cabin crew from from East European economic blackspots, recruit them on fixed contracts through local agencies on local terms and conditions to circumvent the employment laws of the country you intend to base them in. Bond them into servitude to ensure that once they arrive in that country and realise they can't live on those conditions they will be unable to leave, or if they do leave you get a hefty payout.....
Top Tips for Ryanair CEOs.....
Theres no such thing as bad publicity, even negative publicity is a good thing as long as its free, so don't be afraid to say something stupid whenever you see a microphone or camera.....
Try to create an identical clone of yourself, (you can call him 'Mini Me' if you like) for the occasions when you're stuck at the races or unavailable for comment so that he can say stupid things on your behalf whenever he sees a camera or microphone.....
All staff are to purchase pedometers (step counters). At the end of the month step totals should be submitted to payroll and a "carpet and floor wear and tear" fee shall be deducted from salaries. Employees (sorry, "contractors") are advised (not) to take steps to reduce costs.
Last edited by welliewanger : 4th November 2009 at 23:22.
Now why not get petty and ban staff from plugging phone chargers in? Make the staff buy their own stationary, or better yet tell them to steal it from hotels.
We at Ryanair have a policy of stealing hotel pens
It's the managers that stay in the hotels though, when they do their annual (or twice a year now!) tour around Europe to telle veryone about more paycuts because RYR made €2million net profit a day over the last 6 months!
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prefer to sleep in their cars in the staff car park at Dublin airport prior to their 04:30 check ins. God knows its difficult enough to have an 'Aussie Wash' in the back seat of a 03 Nissan Micra without having to wrestle with a frozen printer cartridge.....
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