Heli, non-heli (and even non-aviation) humour ...
Probably been told before and maybe not that PC and I apologise if it offends anybody, no offence is meant.
The hardest thing about being a fixed wing pilot? Telling your Father you are Gay.
The hardest thing about being a fixed wing pilot? Telling your Father you are Gay.
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Location, location - is very important when buying a house.
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Hey Doors Off, don't worry about offending anyone, this is the humour section. You can't be all things to all men - thank God!
Besides, I always thought it was about the gay son finding the hardest thing to tell his dad is that he's a fixed wing pilot
Besides, I always thought it was about the gay son finding the hardest thing to tell his dad is that he's a fixed wing pilot
Join Date: Feb 2014
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DO, FP, please don't go there..
..anyway, too late now.
Hardest thing? only if daddy is a chopper pilot and posting here.
Just don't tell mum that dad is gay as well - just DON'T!
..anyway, too late now.
Hardest thing? only if daddy is a chopper pilot and posting here.
Just don't tell mum that dad is gay as well - just DON'T!
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Canada
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Wife texts husband at work on a cold winter's morning;
"Windows frozen, won't open."
Husband texts back;
"Gently pour some lukewarm water over it."
Wife texts back 5 minutes later;
"Computer exploded."
JD
"Windows frozen, won't open."
Husband texts back;
"Gently pour some lukewarm water over it."
Wife texts back 5 minutes later;
"Computer exploded."
JD
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Holly Beach, Louisiana
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Seen on a North Sea Aviation Web Site Frequented by Helicopter Pilots
"I was fed up with being burgled every other day in my neighbourhood.
So, I tore out my alarm system & de-registered from our local
Neighbourhood Watch.
I've planted a Pakistani flag in each corner of my front garden and a large Black Flag of ISIL in its center.
Now, the Aberdeenshire Police, the National Security Bureau, Scotland
Yard, MI-5, MI-6, the CIA and every other intelligence service in
the UK are all watching my house 24x7x365.
My children are followed to school every day and my wife when she goes shopping. I'm followed to and from work every day. So no one bothers me at all.
I've never felt safer."
"I was fed up with being burgled every other day in my neighbourhood.
So, I tore out my alarm system & de-registered from our local
Neighbourhood Watch.
I've planted a Pakistani flag in each corner of my front garden and a large Black Flag of ISIL in its center.
Now, the Aberdeenshire Police, the National Security Bureau, Scotland
Yard, MI-5, MI-6, the CIA and every other intelligence service in
the UK are all watching my house 24x7x365.
My children are followed to school every day and my wife when she goes shopping. I'm followed to and from work every day. So no one bothers me at all.
I've never felt safer."
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: England & Scotland
Age: 63
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True story.
Overheard in Waitrose (food store) in Cobham, Surrey, from the mouth of a 9 year old girl.
"Daddy, does 'Lego' have a silent "t" like 'Merlot'?"
Priceless!
Overheard in Waitrose (food store) in Cobham, Surrey, from the mouth of a 9 year old girl.
"Daddy, does 'Lego' have a silent "t" like 'Merlot'?"
Priceless!
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Australia
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pronunciation
The story I heard was that the two actresses Bridget Bardot and Jean Harlow met at a party, and Jean Harlow said cattily to Bridget Bardot "Why don't you pronounce the "t" in Bardot?" To which the quick reply was "Oh, no darling, the "t" is silent as in Harlow".
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Netherlands
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After being married for thirty years, the airline captain’s wife asked her husband to describe her.
He looked at her for a while, then said: “You are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.”
She asked... “What does that mean?”
He replied: “Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous and Hot.”
She smiled happily and exclaimed... “Oh, that’s so lovely! What about I, J, and K?”
He said, “I’m Just Kidding!”
The swelling in his eye is going down and the doctor is fairly optimistic about saving his family Jewels.
He looked at her for a while, then said: “You are A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K.”
She asked... “What does that mean?”
He replied: “Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Foxy, Gorgeous and Hot.”
She smiled happily and exclaimed... “Oh, that’s so lovely! What about I, J, and K?”
He said, “I’m Just Kidding!”
The swelling in his eye is going down and the doctor is fairly optimistic about saving his family Jewels.
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Thaïland
Age: 67
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The same : A blonde climb in the front and ask the pilot : It's a Airbus or a Bell Helicopter ?"
The pilot very proud say it's a Bell !
the blonde very excited screaming very loud : "BELL ! BELL, BELL"
The Pilot say : Be quiet please....
The blonde : ELL, ELL, ELL,ELL....
The pilot very proud say it's a Bell !
the blonde very excited screaming very loud : "BELL ! BELL, BELL"
The Pilot say : Be quiet please....
The blonde : ELL, ELL, ELL,ELL....