Mrs Bloggs 'At Home' Etiquette/Protocols
Oh No!!!
Minigun, old chap, it wasn't the Vauxhall Corsa keys that did for you, it was the tie! Really old fellow, a Guards tie is fine, cavalry regiment even better but NOT - definitely NOT - Royal Pioneer Corps; the lady would have taken you for a navvy.
Anyway, this Thread needs a conclusion idc and it can only be a Post Action Report on how it all went. Ideally, endorsements from the host/hostess and the Mrs would add the verisimilitude to give authenticity to the account.
O-D
Anyway, this Thread needs a conclusion idc and it can only be a Post Action Report on how it all went. Ideally, endorsements from the host/hostess and the Mrs would add the verisimilitude to give authenticity to the account.
O-D
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Don't know about
but it's really cool to give your static IP Address there these days. That's only if you are happy to be considered a Geek though. 
clubs in the bottom left hand corner.
DIRECTOR
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Neptunus Rex
I have to agree with your comments regarding cravats. They would make the current trend of trendies who wear suits without ties look a little less scruffy. I hear they are having a bit of a comeback like caps and not just with our pinky friends.
I have to agree with your comments regarding cravats. They would make the current trend of trendies who wear suits without ties look a little less scruffy. I hear they are having a bit of a comeback like caps and not just with our pinky friends.
Cravats? A bit Edward Fox / Terry Thomas and something of the louche lounge lizard about the wearers, surely?
"Hello, helllo, hello, Mrs (pongo) - I say, ding dong, woof woof, eh what?"
The Spams, who of course have no class, refer to them as 'ascots', it seems. Remember the 'Nuke 'em Now' SAC Command Crew comics of the 1970s with photos of subterranean missile geeks in flying suits? Always with some garish neckware...not even tied properly, but 'ready made' with a fastener at the back of the neck
. Certain sartorial suicide if you're ever caught wearing one of those; even worse than a ready made bow tie!
"Hello, helllo, hello, Mrs (pongo) - I say, ding dong, woof woof, eh what?"
The Spams, who of course have no class, refer to them as 'ascots', it seems. Remember the 'Nuke 'em Now' SAC Command Crew comics of the 1970s with photos of subterranean missile geeks in flying suits? Always with some garish neckware...not even tied properly, but 'ready made' with a fastener at the back of the neck
. Certain sartorial suicide if you're ever caught wearing one of those; even worse than a ready made bow tie!
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
Quite right me old, what you missed though is that Mr & Mrs MM live in th evillage and presumably don't want this to be their last social occasion as well.
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sinle ended bow tie
Ah indeed - worn with some abomination of No1 uniform and white shirt at junior mess dining in nights? - didn't stay tied for long!!
The other "uniform abomination" in v early days was some strange combination of issue shoes, issue collar detached shirt and tie, and civilian jacket / trousers - worn until the hairy blue battledress arrived !
The other "uniform abomination" in v early days was some strange combination of issue shoes, issue collar detached shirt and tie, and civilian jacket / trousers - worn until the hairy blue battledress arrived !
I certainly do! Horrible things - along with the joys of the white waistcoat and wing collar which were still around in the 1970s!
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Bow Tie the easy way.
Tie it around your thigh!
As many attempts as necessary to get it right.
Slide it down your leg and over your foot.
At the back of the knot, stitch it permanently in position.
Cut the neckband.
Stitch Velcro of the two ends.
You now have a presentable, correctly tied bow tie, that is simple to put on and take off.
By the way, a smashing thread.
As many attempts as necessary to get it right.
Slide it down your leg and over your foot.
At the back of the knot, stitch it permanently in position.
Cut the neckband.
Stitch Velcro of the two ends.
You now have a presentable, correctly tied bow tie, that is simple to put on and take off.
By the way, a smashing thread.
You now have a presentable, correctly tied bow tie, that is simple to put on and take off.
Hairy blue battledress - what a joy that was. The sandpapering effect of which was the only reason to wear 'shreddies' (over one's normal underpants) to avoid third degree thigh chafing. And wasn't sewing sqn/entry gorgette patches onto the blouse lapels such fun...
The true 'lunatic' outfit was worn by all junior entry Flt Cdts (except those on Sov Sqn) when it was their turn to assemble on the JMPG prior to marching over to the North Airfield armed with brooms to clean out the Senior Entry garage on Saturday mornings. Pale blue tracksuits, CWW boots....and topped with the 'civilian hat'...
If you couldn't take a joke.....
Last edited by BEagle; 11th Nov 2010 at 12:28.
Avoid imitations
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No no no no no no - not embossed but engraved. That is to say, made by an engraver chappie carving a copper plate to be used.
Real printers' ink too, so the indentation of the engraving gives the printing a raised nature which can be detected (as can its absence) by the surreptitious running of a fingernail across the card under investigation.
Pshaw to "embossed", I'm disappointed in you PN, and particularly you O-D.
Real printers' ink too, so the indentation of the engraving gives the printing a raised nature which can be detected (as can its absence) by the surreptitious running of a fingernail across the card under investigation.
Pshaw to "embossed", I'm disappointed in you PN, and particularly you O-D.
Teeters, don't know why, but all your theatricals here suddenly sparked a scary memory of you wearing a bright red soldier's uniform, playing a leading role in an open air play. "Far from the Madding crowd", I think it was, must have been 1984!
Siseman,
A hat was still on the joining instructions for OCTU at Henlow in '76. Never wore it once
(P.s. You and I must have been at OCTU around the same time, 310 course in my case
).
Last edited by ShyTorque; 11th Nov 2010 at 13:21.
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At Home
Reading some of these recollections takes me back to one memorable gathering at the married quarter of a rather straight-laced Wg Cdr and his American wife. The ‘fun detector’ and myself arrived at the appointed hour and proceeded to mingle and make the usual small talk with the other guests.
Drinks and nibbles were distributed and everything was following the usual predicable pattern when a loud Scottish voice in the hall preceded the arrival in the room of ‘Jock’ a flight lieutenant who always had an opinion on everyone and everything. It was obvious that his rather downtrodden wife had failed in her attempts to keep him off the sauce prior to the event and he quickly started hoovering down additional gin & tonics. Before long he was leering down the cleaverage of the wing commanders wife, spilling food on the carpet and drink down his shirt. You could see people trying their best to ignore what was happening and also shuffling around the room so as not to get trapped by him when he lurched in their direction. Eventually, much to everyone’s relief, he sat down on a sofa to leer at one of the younger wives and then slowly but surely his head fell to one side and he slipped into a deep sleep, with a line of drool slowly running down the corner of his mouth.
The drinks, nibbles and small talk continued much as before, with everyone doing their best to ignore the semi-conscious figure slumped on the sofa. Then end was rather predicable. Having slept for a good 30-40 minutes Jock slowly began to stir into life at a time when there was a slight lull in the conversation. He slowly extended one of his legs whilst at the same time letting out an impressively loud, two octave fart that had sufficient recoil to stir him from his slumbers. He then sat up, looked around, saw his wife looking aghast and announced that it was time for her to take him home.
Easily the most memorable ‘At Home’ I ever attended.
Matoman
Drinks and nibbles were distributed and everything was following the usual predicable pattern when a loud Scottish voice in the hall preceded the arrival in the room of ‘Jock’ a flight lieutenant who always had an opinion on everyone and everything. It was obvious that his rather downtrodden wife had failed in her attempts to keep him off the sauce prior to the event and he quickly started hoovering down additional gin & tonics. Before long he was leering down the cleaverage of the wing commanders wife, spilling food on the carpet and drink down his shirt. You could see people trying their best to ignore what was happening and also shuffling around the room so as not to get trapped by him when he lurched in their direction. Eventually, much to everyone’s relief, he sat down on a sofa to leer at one of the younger wives and then slowly but surely his head fell to one side and he slipped into a deep sleep, with a line of drool slowly running down the corner of his mouth.
The drinks, nibbles and small talk continued much as before, with everyone doing their best to ignore the semi-conscious figure slumped on the sofa. Then end was rather predicable. Having slept for a good 30-40 minutes Jock slowly began to stir into life at a time when there was a slight lull in the conversation. He slowly extended one of his legs whilst at the same time letting out an impressively loud, two octave fart that had sufficient recoil to stir him from his slumbers. He then sat up, looked around, saw his wife looking aghast and announced that it was time for her to take him home.
Easily the most memorable ‘At Home’ I ever attended.
Matoman
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
Bastards; must have supported some other team.
CG
PS Golfette just married George Hardy's grandson. Liverpool supporter. Go figure.
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
My white mess jacket had been in the sin bin for 10 years when I was posted to Ascension. It came out a shade of brown. Many washes later it was an acceptable shade of off-white. It was then sent to the laundry and came back as soft as a babies ******. Back to the laundry - it is supposed to be starched. It had to be sent from Nairn to Aberdeen an duly came back as an imitation of plasterboard. Still it remained reasonably presentable to the 6 months and innumerable dining-in nights.
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(P.s. You and I must have been at OCTU around the same time, 310 course in my case 
).
).
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Matoman
A Wing Commander with an American wife certainly narrows the field. Could it have been the inimitable 'Bang Commander Wizzlegette?'
Had it been, they would both have laughed it off. When he was Staish at ISK, on NYE '67/68, he started a snowball fight with OC 206 in the Officer's Mess Bar!
A Wing Commander with an American wife certainly narrows the field. Could it have been the inimitable 'Bang Commander Wizzlegette?'
Had it been, they would both have laughed it off. When he was Staish at ISK, on NYE '67/68, he started a snowball fight with OC 206 in the Officer's Mess Bar!