Caption competition
"And you want £100k for a 20% stake?! It's a great idea - you can watch porn, it detects the missus approaching from any angle, BUT it doesn't dispense cold beer and for that reason, I'm out..."
Join Date: Feb 2006
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RAF trial cybersex for the troops..
Or
" Yes Sir it converts your brain waves into an image and projects it onto the screen..... Errr hang on Sir, we seem to have a problem, nothing is coming through"
Or
Redundant RAF Navigators are now being actively recruited to work on Google Street.
Or
"Ok Sir, that's the helmet fitted, we just need to add the glove to monitor heart rate and perspiration, then insert the rectal probe to measure Sphincter Flutter and we are done".
or
"And the visor fits where?..... ahhhh"
Or
" Yes Sir it converts your brain waves into an image and projects it onto the screen..... Errr hang on Sir, we seem to have a problem, nothing is coming through"
Or
Redundant RAF Navigators are now being actively recruited to work on Google Street.
Or
"Ok Sir, that's the helmet fitted, we just need to add the glove to monitor heart rate and perspiration, then insert the rectal probe to measure Sphincter Flutter and we are done".
or
"And the visor fits where?..... ahhhh"
Last edited by NutLoose; 20th Feb 2012 at 02:04.
Join Date: Feb 2006
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"It is really built from several xbox controllers and runs on a cut down chinese copy of windows 95, ohh the carbon fibre trim, that we added to make it look expensive so we could justify the 250 k price per unit".
Join Date: Feb 2006
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"I was made in Germany for the boxheads originally"
or
"It's the new ACARS, Automatic Crewman Aural Response System, basically it works like that old toy GI Joe system where you pulled a string out of it's back and it spouted out commands, on this version, you punch the buttons on his head and he says stuff like, How many sugars do you want Boss? or Yes Sir no problem or can I carry your bags Sir, a really useful piece of kit, this is the Mk2 version with the enlarged blinkers.."
or
"It's the new ACARS, Automatic Crewman Aural Response System, basically it works like that old toy GI Joe system where you pulled a string out of it's back and it spouted out commands, on this version, you punch the buttons on his head and he says stuff like, How many sugars do you want Boss? or Yes Sir no problem or can I carry your bags Sir, a really useful piece of kit, this is the Mk2 version with the enlarged blinkers.."
Last edited by NutLoose; 20th Feb 2012 at 01:16.
The Daily Star classifieds had previously disappointed Bloggs, with his $20 investment on x-ray specs, but whilst his latest set had cost a little more, early results were promising.
P1
P1
Stargazing
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: West
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"Yes sir, this is the third Milliband brother: Nigel. We managed to sort out the dalek voice, the persecution complex and the wild staring eyes. Problem is, if he tries to stand up unaided, he topples over.
Evertonian
"...and if Sir has a little more to spend, the W-2000 model has a host of significant upgrades over the standard tin foil hat."
Join Date: Apr 2002
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"Its like this Prime Minister Harman, now women are flying in the airforce they can get their hairdone at the same time...the savings to the taxpayer would be immense.."
...or
.."Now look here Scroggins how much do you think this bloody lots gonna weigh when a pilot pulls an 8 g turn".....
...or
.."Now look here Scroggins how much do you think this bloody lots gonna weigh when a pilot pulls an 8 g turn".....
Avoid imitations
New robotic drop bear weapon revealed.
It reportedly blinds enemy fighter pilots by putting its little plastic paws over their eyes.
It reportedly blinds enemy fighter pilots by putting its little plastic paws over their eyes.