Milo Minderbinder

YourHealth | Dad sues uni over sperm donor's death

"A medical student in China died while donating his semen for the fifth time in two months.
His father, Mr Zheng Jinglong, is suing the university that is affiliated to the sperm bank for more than four million yuan (S$808,000) in compensation, reported China Daily.
The reason for the student's sudden death is still unclear, though the hospital said it was "accidental".
Mr Zheng Gang, a doctoral candidate in medical studies from Huazhong University of Science and Technology, in Hubei province, had died in February last year, during his fifth donation at the sperm bank.
The father said his son was healthy and had just received a health check, reported Yangtze River Times.
The university allegedly talked the donor's wife and father into agreeing to cremate the body two days after his death, said the report.
The father demanded an autopsy several times, but the university refused.
The local court in Wuhan, capital of the province, has opened a case involving this incident.
The university had compensated the family with 88,000 yuan "in humanitarian aid"and will waive the tuition fees of Mr Zheng's wife, who is also a doctoral candidate at the university.
During the trial, the lawyer and the representative for the university denied any connection with the student's death and asked the court to reject the father's appeals.
According to the Hubei Provincial Human Sperm Bank website, a qualified donor must donate his semen from eight to 15 times in six months to earn between 3,800 and 4,800 yuan.
An additional 200 yuan fee is paid out if the donor completes his assignment in three months.
The trial continues.

vulcanised

Brings a new meaning to 'knackered'.

Tableview

Boggles the mind! Maybe he was hooked up to one of those things that they use on bulls.

B Fraser

Maybe he should have taken one of those pills they give to bulls.

I don't know what's in them but they taste of peppermint.

11Fan

Should have just done it by hand.

On that note.....

Lewis's cousin, the farmer, ordered a high-tech milking machine. Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first. So, he inserted his penis into the equipment, turned the switch on and everything else was automatic.

Soon, he realized that the equipment provided him with as much pleasure as his wife did. When the fun was over, though, he quickly realized that he couldn't remove the instrument from his penis. He read the manual but didn't find any useful information. He tried every button on the instrument, but still without success. Finally, the farmer decided to call the supplier's Customer Service Hot Line.

"Hello, I just bought a milking machine from your company. It works fantastic, but how do I remove it from the cow's udder?" "Don't worry," replied the customer service rep, "The machine will release automatically once it's collected two gallons."

stuckgear

fifth donation in 2 months... sounds like a bit of a wa nk er.

for 24/7 customer convenience they could install a hole-in-the-wall facility.




don't worry i'll show myself out...

hat, sock, door.

sea oxen

Good thing he wasn't trying to put up new wallpaper - he wouldn't have lasted the first roll.

I hope that the sperm recipients are advised to counsel their sons that wanking's bad for your health - "It did for your father".

If the compensation claim succeeds, I guess that really was the money shot.

Mr Zheng really came to a sticky end, but at least he died happy, doing something he loved.

SO

11Fan

Pretty severe penalty for early withdraws at that bank.

stuckgear

indeed SO, and it also brings a complete duality to the euphamism of 'rubbing one out'.

Noah Zark.

No wonder a lot of Chinese wear glasses!

jabird

Has a crime been committed?

Spermicide?

sled dog

One off the wlist ?

ShyTorque

Rumour is he died after complications following a broken wrist.

orgASMic

Did they cremate the stiff cos they couldn't shut the coffin lid?

jabird

Was the operation overseen by Prof Wan King?

(no, I didn't edit this)

Hydromet

I reckon the mods will pull this.

sea oxen

stuckgear

Speeling error aside, you rule.

This episode reminds me why our film stars are Ron Jeremy, John Holmes and that German bloke whose co star buggered things up so he just went (or rather, the opposite) again. Just like that.

You won't sell too many loops featuring Wee Wang, although there might be a snuff market.

SO

ShyTorque

Maybe he'd spent time down here:

http://www.rude-world.co.uk/images/wankingpath.jpg

Fox3WheresMyBanana

Could we not solve the World's sperm shortage by re-employing all those redundant bankers?

Should have the vats (VATs?) topped off in less than an hour.

Fox3WheresMyBanana

They'll never win the case.
In news just pulled off the Reuters feed, Ant & Dec will be appearing as expert witnesses for the University.
Ant "We'll probably get a lot of abuse for this, but we're used to doing things for ourselves. Having been voted "TV's biggest Anchors" for the third year running is probably why they've hired us, but we owe it all to Simon Bates - he's the master."
Dec"I'm not sure why we have to travel by Tug, but at least we'll have time to prep for our new biker movie. We'll be polishing our helmets for that one".

Ant & Dec are sponsored by Kleenex and Argyle Socks.