Plastic Paddy

***********Warning**********

Your Computer has just been infected with a virus.

Fortunately it is an Irish Computer Virus, and technology in Ireland is not as good as it could be, so this is a MANUAL Virus.

Please delate all of the files on your hard drive, then forward this message to all of the people in your address book.

Thank You.

Paddy O'Hacker

(P.S. Apologies if you've heard it before)

Kermit 180

Have the anti virus orgs been notified?

Kermie

KeithAlexander

sdrawkcab gnihtyreve etirw ot si suriv eht pots ot yaw ylno eht yltnerappa

[ 18 August 2001: Message edited by: El Keefo ]

HugMonster

Î thøûght ÿøû hä¢ tø wrïtê ït lïkê thïs¿?

FiveMilesOut

Hi there,

I'm an Irish software virus engineer.

This is a particularly nasty virus that has been going around, and is believed to have originated somewhere just outside of Limerick.

A disgruntled computer studies undergraduate by the name of Paddy O Houlihan is believed to be the culprit.

My team and I have been working on a fix, and have come up with an Irish solution to an Irish problem.

Simply manually reinput all of the data that wan originally on your hard drive, and this should take care of the problem.

All the best,


FMO

Celtic Emerald

Begorrah FMO

You're a cute hoor if there ever was one

Emerald

Captain-Ireland

Whats black and blue and lyes at the bottom of the ocean.....


English pilots who tell too many irish jokes heh.

You want it when?

Captain Sir...

An Aer-Lingus flight enters the circuit at a new airport and the captain looks down at the runway...
"Dat is day shortest runway I have ever seen" he exclaims
"Sure is" sayes his laconic P2
After a couple of circuits they decide to try a landing.
"When we land, Paddy, as soon as the mains are down you hit reverse trhust" said P1
"I hit reverse thrust"
"We both stand on the brakes as soon as the nose wheel is down"
"On the brakes"
"As soon as she dives on the nose wheel, you pull the parking brake on"
"Parking brake on - as she dives"
One more circuit, and they tighten their harness's, and commence a steep descent full flaps....
With his normal skill he lands right on the threshold as they touch he shouts
"Paddy engage the reverse thust..."
"Engaged!"
Every thing is red lined and the nose comes down
"Brakes paddy!"
"I'm braking, I'm braking"
"Parking brake!"
"On..."
In a cloud of tyre smoke and abused metal the plane halts with the nose wheel just at the edge of the runway.
"Dat's is the shortest fecking runway I have ever landed on" said the pilot, and then glancing out of the side windows "And the fecking widest."


Why do Aer-Lingus have Shamrocks on the tail? To give the pilots a clue as to which way to go....


OK, I'll stop.

Celtic Emerald

Jeez

If I see that bleedin joke about the shortest runway again I'll bleedin murder yas

Do you guys have any originality or whah????

Emerald

You want it when?

The Irish football team are kicking up a stink in the pride of the Aer-Lingus fleet - A DC3.

They are smashing the seats and trying to play a game in asile.

To compound the problem - the venerable DC3 is trying to clear the Black Mountains in Wales, eventually as the ball flies through the curtain for the 20th time the captain turns to the F/O and says "go sort those feckers out"

Two minutes later, it goes quiet and the DC3 lifts another 400' and clears the mountains. "What did you do?" askes the captain.

"Too be sure, tis a lovely day, I just asked them to play outside"

-----

How can you tell an aircraft that has been sold by Aer-Lingus?
Outside toilet.

-----

OK, that's it, and I promise not to tell the runway joke again. However I will point out that it is very hard to keep a straight face when you meet someone (Irish) who you've not seen for eight years - and the conversation goes like...

"Tis yourself, isn't it - are you still drinking that lager muck?"
"John! Good to see you, but its 07:00 in the morning"
"True, a pint of Guiness it is then - sets you up for the day"
"Oh god...."

Meeting (?) what meeting we spent the whole day in the business lounge at LHR (can't spell Heathrow)