Not Nightowl

Um...excuse me...but how do spell VNAV?

main_dog

That would be that magic button on the MCP that we're all afraid to touch... After all, we're all still so amazed at how well V/S works on the "fancy new B744F" (compared to the B742 where what you did with the V/S wheel and what the airplane actually did were only vaguely related)

boredcounter

Horse p!ss mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm the smell of money ;-)

grounded27

If you have ever stuck a plastic spoon in a door seal to have a smoke.

Not Nightowl

To grounded27.....never smoked mate but in a previous life as an A&P amongst other things used to see the brown crap 'round door seals and especially outflow valves in the days when smoking was allowed on pax 'planes, is tar or what ever from smoking

harry-seaside

The crew transport is the back of the mechanics van.

A company uniform doesnt excist, just throw together a white shirt and some stripes.

That white shirt is black with grease within 2 days.

You've realised you never worn those aviators sunglasses you've bought last christmas.

You say, wow the visiblity is pretty good with the moon out.

Begging the girl of the starbucks to give you crew discount.

The girl of starbucks not believing you're crew cause she has never heard of the company name that's on your badge.

You're carying 2 bags with you, 1 for some clothes and 1 for microwave food, a sixpack of beer and all the fruit you stole from the breakfast.

Your parking position is so far away it isn't shown on the jeppesen plates.


I can go on for hours like this!

Sad thing is; It's all true...

G&T ice n slice

You wonder why people keep buying machines from Fabrique Nationale. They're obviously not much good, buy what the hey, you're being paid to keep flying those emergency spare part shipments...

Doctor Cruces

Not Nightowl, When did you work for Emerald??

pithblot

You still use hand signals when calling V speeds, Flap position, Gear Up and Gear Down.

atlast

Oh Pithblot, best one yet, for me anyway.
I'm in the B744 now and still can't stop
The hand signals sneaking out now and
Again (all the time!)
As an aside, I did have one of our
Younger FOs, up and coming from an ERJ,
Say that that was a good idea if I wanted
Something done whilst he was on the radio!

Maybe it's time is coming round again?
Oh the circle of aviation life :-)
What's next? Looking outside and doing
Visual approaches?

Agaricus bisporus

Being desperate enough to drink Starbuck's "coffee".

pithblot

Glad that brought a smile to your face atlast. Old habits die hard and visual approaches are still fun!

You know your a freight dog if:

+ the GPS data base expired in 2001 and you are annoyed that the KR86 has finally stopped "pointing to the station", but pleasantly surprised that you are still flexible enough to reach over the co-pilots head and tune to the null on the old set!

+ you have to set Indices or adjust anything in the Hydraulic System before engaging the Auto Pilot.

+ You enjoy flying with your arm out the window.

+ you wish you paid more attention when the older captains were talking about
Star Shots and Pressure Pattern Flying.

+ while doing the preflight you realise that uneasy feeling is because you aren't carrying a torch.

EAM

…of your car of course, which is the only vehicle you are using, equipt with a GPS.

frieghtdog2000

When you go to braekfast in a hotel in Ireland and the waiter says "Will you be having a Guinness with your breakfast?" Or just brings it without asking (Cork).

When you check out the receptionist says "You forgot the soap and shampoo from the bathroom".

main_dog

You're completely unconcerned about the Autopilot or F/D dropping out but fear strikes your heart if the coffee machine goes U/S

deathray

You have convinced yourself that the couches in the Leipzig hub are actually very comfortable to sleep on .

Cavallier

You have a least three pilot shirts in hotel laundries around the world.

Narrow Runway

The crew room TV is showing German hardcore porn as standard.

printingray

You show up the work early and a Gulfstream V pilot asks you to fuel the plane and put his bags in the back.

BenThere

You never thought autothrust switches could be operational.

You can be sound asleep within 60 seconds of sitting in any padded chair.

The hour of the day has absolutely nothing to do with when you go to sleep or wake up.

You don't bother looking at your schedule as every month is a single 17 day trip and your schedule will be out the window on day 2.