Taceval, Maxival and Minival

[OldAgeandTreachery]

When did they become part and parcel of RAF life? I left Halton in Dec 72 and was posted to Kinloss. I seem to remember halcyon days of work, sport and leisure time but I don't remember exercises. I can't recall when it all changed.

[Linedog]

I left Halton in March '73 to go to 8SQN at Lossie.
We had several minival type inconveniences until I went to Laarbruch in March '76. Then all hell let loose. We seemed to get the full set every 3 months. In '79 I was imported to heaven at Finningley.................. Nothing. :D

[charliegolf]

In '79 I was imported to heaven at Finningley.................. Nothing.

In Oct 79 I arrived at Finningly on a Sunday evening, and had an exercise on the Monday!:(

CG

[Janda]

I arrived at Kinloss on 2 Jan 73 having recently graduated from Topcliffe as an AEOp. I remember lying in my Sergeants Mess bed, not long after arrival, at an ungodly hour and being woken by the klaxon going loud and proud. Had to be told by my next door neighbour that I needed to get my A into G and get to my place of work. Thats when I found out about this type of exercise. And discovered the joys of a compo sausage. So I would say they started very early 70's.

[Finningley Boy]

When stationed at Portreath in 88-90 I was billeted at St Mawgan. We had no wailing tannoy systems or vehicles driving around outside with somebody shouting through megaphone, as was the case at Leuchars in 1973, instead when Portreath went to play war St Mawgan didn't, thus I used to get a knock on my door from the Orderly airman or corporal who when I responded said you've got to report to your section, at silly o'clock. When I was at the Static War Headquarters at Boerfink near Ramstein, we had bliss. No Tacevals, Minivals or the Max kind. Just fell into a different routine; from 24 hour shifts to 12 on 12 off, or, and I'm sure of this during Crested Eagle 1980, 12 on and 24 off! And it didn't matter whether you were working real world or taking part in whatever exercise; Crested Eagle, Able Archer or Wintex.:ok:

But as for when they started, I'd say sometime in the early 1960s in Germany, or even before, Leuchars had its first one in October 1966 as related in my last book Northern Q;

'originally planned for the 18th but postponed to the 19th due to the weather. This first evaluation was considered a practice run as such, that is to say there was a degree of notice and a sense of walking the station through the proceedings to get the idea of what would be expected in the future. However, when that time came, there would be no notice.' sentence taken from my original draft.

FB:)

PS, the best was lying in bed at silly o'clock at St Mawgan hearing the local people stumbling around when just they were having a Taceval or Sand grouse or whatever!

[bosnich71]

Taceval also existed in RAFG in early 60's for sure.Did one at Bruggen on 213.

[The Old Fat One]

At the other end of the calendar, who remembers when they stopped (or morphed into whatever they called "desert training days"). I left in 2003 and based my dining out speech around a piss take of old style tacevals etc and it went down rather well.

They had already started when I arrived Kinloss in 76 and I guess they had mostly stopped after the Cold War ended circa 90.

Seriously though, they were one of the more absurd aspects of service life for a decade or so - endless opportunities for playing the system and having some fun - but also a major ball ache for anyone with a life.

****ing hated them personally, not just because of the buggeration factor, but mainly because they were so childishly pathetic and clearly just an appraisal exercise for the staish. But hey, you gotta take the rough with the smooth.

[4mastacker]

I arrived at Gutersloh in early 1970 and they were already part of the scenery although at the time it was either a Minival or a Taceval; Maxivals came along sometime later. Enjoyed some them, others not so much. One lingering memory is that of a Sqn Ldr stacker from HQSTC during a Leuchars Taceval getting his nuts rattled by a pick axe handle held Jimmy E*****d, who told him in a broad Glaswegian accent to "Spread yer f****** legs! Now can I see your 1250 please, Sir".

[Pontius Navigator]

The V-Force, in both UK and Cyprus had two one-day and one 3-4 day exercise each year in the 60s. We had 6 NBC suits issued in Cyprus, but no training.

The first UK traceback I experienced was at St Mawgan in 74 with a part 1. As a stude I was 'detached' to Gibraltar, ie sent home. The next day I had to be dragged out of my quarter at St Eval as no one said it was Endex. That same year I was at Wittering as it worked up to its first; rather pointless as its role was to deploy.

At Kinloss I asked the Regt Officer about annual range practice. I got a blank look. I think Taceval only hit them in 76. Minivals came later as the importance of tacevals as stn cdr promotion exams was realised.

We had a taceval at Waddo around 92 or 93, and the first time I recall civilian life intruding. We had lots of no-shows as husbands or wives were at home child minding while husbands and partners were working nights etc. Civilian employers would no longer accept the military imperative.

At Coningsby we had Priory, the next best thing, with mass raids, etc as late as 96-97, by then the war plan documents were hopelessly out of date, units had gone, aircraft and sqns, radar sites etc, all changing but no one prepared to destroy the books, just in case . . .

[Skeleton]

Arrived at Lossie Jan 79 and we seemed to be having one of the three every other month, even a move across the airfield to the Jaguar OCU didn't save me, I moved just as someone deemed the OCU would continue normal flying but play at war at the same time. I never did get why they they were so certain the visitors would arrive when we were all in bed, and why we had to keep practicing getting out of bed to meet them.

Leuchars also liked to party on down when it came to practising getting out of bed, so it was a relief to reach Kinloss where you still did Tacevals but in the main got a lie in.

They stopped or faded away about 1993?

[Fareastdriver]

There were Minvals in the V force in 1962. At Honington there were two Main Force Victor squadrons and my Valiant tanker squadron.
When the hooters used to go and the tannoys in the mess corridors were barking I used to roll over and go back to sleep, only being disturbed by the pounding of feet outside. After a leisurely breakfast I would go to work and with the rest of the squadron watch the panic in the airfield through the crew room windows.

In 1964 or thereabouts I was eventually knocked up by a steward who had a message requesting me to go to the Squadron. Something to do with an Airborne Control Post or suchlike.

We only had one serviceable aircraft and we were required to provide that and a spare. On my suggestion we nominated the u/s aircraft as the primary with the serviceable one as the backup.

Everybody happy; back to the mess for breakfast.

[Neptunus Rex]

In 1971/72 at Honington, 204 Sqn Shackletons had the National Search and Rescue commitment, which included being excused from Tacevals.

However, there had to be a 'Refuge' for the off-duty 204 crews -it was the Officers' Mess Bar!

[OldAgeandTreachery]

Reading these posts just goes to show how inaccurate memories can be. Might it be that I am using my youthful summer recollections by removing the bad bits and remembering only the best bits?

I do remember,a late 70s, Kinloss ,No Notice ,Exercise, Maxival I think, which was primed to start at 1900. The response from the troops was minimal. Those who had the knowledge passed it around. Result:-Empty singlie blocks and messes. Swathes of personnel "elsewhere" at Startex and last exercise not in the early hours.

[langleybaston]

A civvy view.

I suspect that the nearer the sharp end, the more seriously they were taken. Thus Guetersloh, being as near as you get, took them very seriously in the days of 2,4,19 and 92 squadrons c. 1970.
Serious enough for families to be advised to maintain a grab bag to board the massive fleet of RAF coaches to go to Ostend, although that bit never got played.
When the Soviets invaded Czecho it felt VERY real for a few days as I recall.

They were still big deal when I was on the TACEVAL team at JHQ in the late 1970s, nice not to be on the receiving end. [Met did full NBC training, had the noddy suits and wore them, and dispersed to alternates. Any Met. bugger that did not sign up to this was not posted to RAFG, any awkward bugger was got rid of humanely]

[Maxibon]

I hated TACEVAL; at Leeming, post grounding, I was working in the WOC and the only good thing that ever came out of it was learning how to smoke a cigarette whilst wearing my respirator.

[4mastacker]

langleybaston wrote:

Serious enough for families to be advised to maintain a grab bag to board the massive fleet of RAF coaches to go to Ostend, although that bit never got played.

My bold.

Oh yes it did... but only the once!! Unfortunately, the local population thought it was for real and joined the convoy causing a bit of a traffic problem for the polizei. After that, whenever it came to the evacuation phase, the convoy, sans families, drove around the countryside in a big circle via Marienfeld, Niehorst and Blankenhagen before returning to Gut.

[HAS59]

I arrived at Coningsby in 1972 it was all rather new and ‘second division’ compared to RAFG.

If I may say so – we were rather good, it gave us some confidence and had the balloon ever gone up for real we were as ready as we were ever going to be to face the outcome.
However when I got to Kinloss in the late 80’s it was pathetic. The scenarios were so unrealistic and it was little other than a training day based on skills one might need to use elsewhere in the RAF.
As some have commented, they were seen as ‘promotion exercises’.
Front line first? Everyone else just playing the game?

[BEagle]

I loathed the 'armour plated black bin liner' mentality and the silly black-out nonsense, but enjoyed the increased pace of flying. Except when scrambled to an AD CAP from Wattisham to find no targets had been arranged - on 3 consecutive flights!

At a certain fighter station in Suphpholk, the Stn Cdr had obviously been watching Dad's Army as he ordained that all windows were to have those tape crosses to prevent blast fragments. Well, that might have worked on old wartime 3 x 3 pane windows using gummed paper tape, but he even made ATC put tape crosses on the big plate glass windows in local.... Of course the Fg Offs' union blacked out everything they could find, including the Stn Cdr's car - cue sense of humour failure.

The TACEVAL umpires took one look and reported that the silly crosses were a flight safety hazard at the ATC tower and useless everywhere else. But the best bit was that it took an expensive professional window cleaning team to clear the sticky adhesive residue from non-WW2 bodge tape....

TACEVALs - always a way for Stn Cdrs to demonstrate the height of their absurdity.

Then there was the Battle of Burford when the less-than-tame auxiliary rock squadron spotted a TACEVAL car being filled up at a local petrol station and gave chase, finally cornering the occupants in the middle of the night in Burford having loosed off a few SLR blanks at them....:hmm:

[Haraka]

Yes indeed HAS. It was played pretty well in RAFG with the Maxeval normally being the toughest, since it was your own peers knowing how to put the pressure on. Taceval was then easier and "1's across the board" was a normal annual morale boost for Harrier force in the 70's. The USAF usually used to come down badly on NBC in particular and it was not unknown for a "National Exercise" to suddenly be announced, necessitating their withdrawal from the NATO one.
I came to the conclusion that other NATO members were somewhat baffled by the individualistic approaches of HF components and when deployed in the field we, almost literally, ran rings around the evaluators.

[Vendee]

When I was on Harriers at Wildenrath/Gutersloh, and later Jags at Laarbruch/Coltishall it was taken seriously and with some pride.Wasn't HAS 59 the wartime/exercise RIC location on Gold?

[KPax]

Arrived Bruggen on a Friday June 1977, 2 days later on a Sunday watching the Squadron play football of went the 'hooter', 3 years of Exercise at Bruggen loved every minute. Looking back I must have been mad.

[Landlocked1]

We had a 10 day Taceval in Sept 76 at Marham which I'm pretty sure is a record, still can't work out if it meant we were good or bad at it! The best memories were the sim air attacks reds which normally meant running for cover of course. During one such raid two of us found ourselves guarding a site on the 'other' side of the airfield miles away from anyone so we hopped up one of those Victor tail serv platforms to get a good view and enjoy the beautiful summer sunshine ( 76 what a year). Two Belgium starfighters roared low over the station and past us very noisey , very close and at eye level , needless to say , scaring the crap out of us. I still use that as an excuse now when I can't hear what the wife says........:D

[Haraka]

Oh,there was one about then, not a million miles away,when the entire senior management of one " self -licking lollipop " recce support unit was thankfully trashed and their "boss" consequently posted.

Unfortunately some continued on........although thankfully diluted among the rest of a generally vibrant and competent community .We had one of these oddities (ex-Nav),who didn't want to be in RAFG (having previously turned down Singapore!):and who, in front of Harrier aircrew, refused to identify NATO ground equipment on imagery " without consulting my reference manuals"

Oh Yes. Absolutely a great attitude for First Phase reporting from a highly stressed pilot, with snap decisions within a very few minutes from "bird in" to Int.Report out!
But not , as we were constantly reminded " how we used to do it at *****"

[Pontius Navigator]

On ISK and realism, in late 70s, the SOpsO came up with a daring plan.

Co-locate an Ops Centre for both Lossie and Kinloss south of the Elgin-Forres ridge.

This suffered from the NIH syndrome and being an excellent idea.

Then Jules Flood, SOpsO at Honington suggested setting up austere minimal dispersals at the many closed or minimal airfields around East Anglia and Lincolnshire. This idea got a little further but failed as the concept was not explained to the JOs sent out to check out the local areas.

Plan - a runway with sufficient concrete for emergency occasional use. A caravan or reasonable weather proof building. Access for bowsers. Supply of simple rearmament such as Aim 9.

Recce - good surface runway like main base. Full weapons replenishment. Sleeping accommodation, Ops room, comms lines direct to ADOC etc.

Of course wholly missed the point and that was the end of a good plan.

[Pontius Navigator]

OAAT, at a major fighter base in Lincolnshire we (they) had achieved astonishingly high results except for nuclear - the joys of a hardened station.

The staish handed over "a first rate station" to CCCC who decided on a crash disaster exercise. It was pre-notified and programmed for an after hours exercise.

Naturally . . . :)

Anyway the exercise went on and started to suck in manpower of which, not a lot. Eventually the sirens went and people slowly returned to work. Keys areas like GDOC, SNCOs etc were all on the airfield and all the indians drinking coffee and watching TV

[Rigga]

Disregarding the above entirely
- Meanwhile, somewhere in ex-Training Command.........................'til 1978, when some bright spark called an excercise at Shawbury at 0500 and all the Blue people 'rushed' into work to find that the civvy drivers werent playing and everyone coud go back to sleep for a couple of hours until they turned up...but not back in your own beds!
Time to clear some shelves, methinks!

[Rigga]

And, as a UK Unit merely resident in RAFG, good 'ole 431MU also had 'NAT-Evals' where we played our own games across Germany and even banned Bruggen from entering our gates!
- "Git Orf Moy LAAAAND!!!"
(Oh, how we used to enjoy those when on the road!-))

[Akrotiri bad boy]

Old Rotund One
I think you nailed the rivet with your comment that TACEVAL's were "an appraisal exercise for the staish".
I recall Lossie circa 1980 when the staish, (who had very appropriate initials for a member of the Royal Air Force), declared that the exercise results were not as expected and that we would TACEVAL 'til we got right:{

[SimWes]

And not forgetting the Egg Banjos signalling EndEx :E

[Courtney Mil]

I loved them. Especially the three day exercises. More flying than you could shake a stick at. In latter days, co-located with our ground crew in the HAS, keep the jet working.

Rule one, stay airborne all day never letting the tankers get more than arm's length away and always stay full on day three - no NBC play that way. Babies' Heads, that stuff that looked a bit like tea, comfy bunk in the 'submarine' and more serviceable jets than you could imagine.

Running an 8-ship CAP with AWACS, maybe some ships, tankers, jammers and some targets was better than a week of 1v1 PIs if you were lucky.

Happy days.

[Skeleton]

Akrotiri Bad Boy,

I recall Lossie circa 1980 when the staish, (who had very appropriate initials for a member of the Royal Air Force), declared that the exercise results were not as expected and that we would TACEVAL 'til we got right

I remember that well and his order that a certain Buccaneer Sqn were to get airborne on the survival scramble and not just taxi through. Day after a dining in night, i will say no more.

[bosnich71]

Rigga .....about 63/64 Bruggen was "evacuated" for some exercise or other. Entire base personnel went camping at various spots around Holland, Germany using just about every truck parked at 431 MU. All was fine until the end of the exercise when.....as rumour had it.....the MU found itself short of 3 Maggies.

[nipva]

Rule one, stay airborne all day never letting the tankers get more than arm's length away

And Rule 2:
Always keep your lunchbox with you in the aircraft, not left in the HAS for the groundcrew to snaffle when you are scrambled!

And Rule 3:
Avoid flying armed.

[langleybaston]

QUOTE:
I recall Lossie circa 1980 when the staish, (who had very appropriate initials for a member of the Royal Air Force), declared that the exercise results were not as expected and that we would TACEVAL 'til we got right.

Said officer shook up a complacent RAF HQ in JHQ ......simple little things like synchronised clocks and HOBs to attend HOBs meetings and not send deputies. Works for me.

Someone once wrote something like: "there is nothing more certain to ensure the proper completion of tasks than the knowledge that, if not completed satisfactorily, they will be repeated until satisfaction is achieved".

[Pontius Navigator]

Lunch box brings to mind the infamous Nimrod survival scrambles, aka taxi round, shut down and shut up in every sense as we were airborne.

"Tower, can we open the rations?"

"Wait"

"C/s, you make make drinks."

"Tower, can we eat"

"Negative"

"Munch munch"

"Munch"

[Pontius Navigator]

Then there was the time at Lossie when the nuclear survival rations were all issued forward.

A massive block of mouse trap, over a foot cube, appeared on the counter in Flying Clothing. Every time the mice passed a bit got nibbled off.

At endex perhaps one pound was left. :)

[ShyTorque]

SH in RAFG during the early 1980s seemed to be one long field deployment. Our Sqn had four planned exercises per year, plus there were the various "Evals" which seemed to be every few weeks. Even when we were on "peacetime" tasking we got caught up in the exercises of the user units.

The best thing, apart from "Endex", was our air control orders, which were usually not above 150 feet agl for helicopters. Not easy to achieve, especially tricky when an under slung load needed a 100 ft strop! But exhilarating to try - Licensed hooliganism :ok:

The worst thing was visiting a typical Harrier deployment "tented city" and seeing the excellent facilities they were given, which sharply contrasted with the lack of even basic stuff and c**p we had to put up with. Towards the end of my time there some plonker decreed that all RAF helicopter crews would have to "cam up" in the cockpit when not flying in full NBC kit, including that dreadful AR5. We flew around looking like clowns whilst the army thought we were barking mad. And we probably were. I took away the overriding view that it was all about upper management gaining points for promotion and had the balloon really gone up, I reckon I would be lucky to survive more than a couple of days.

[Haraka]

visiting a typical Harrier deployment "tented city" and seeing the excellent facilities they were given,

Unofficial Harrier Force Motto:

"Any fool can be uncomfortable".

[ShyTorque]

Unofficial Harrier Force Motto:

"Any fool can be uncomfortable".

With the choice removed from the individual, anyone, fool or otherwise, can be made uncomfortable.

[Dougie M]

Lasting memories of Exercises are always surmounted by the claustrophobic recall of the AR5. One "eval" I recall being all kitted up and standing before two female squippers holding this rubber appendage. Them, not me. Take a deep breath in the respirator close eyes and don the headpiece. On opening eyes and the fullers earth settling, there was a large poster on the wall in front of me with the cartoon character "Wicked Willie" wearing a condom and the subscript "Now you know how I feel". You can't tell if female squippers are grinning in respirators.

[The Old Fat One]

I do remember,a late 70s, Kinloss ,No Notice ,Exercise, Maxival I think, which was primed to start at 1900. The response from the troops was minimal. Those who had the knowledge passed it around. Result:-Empty singlie blocks and messes. Swathes of personnel "elsewhere" at Startex and last exercise not in the early hours.

You are spot on my friend :ok:

As if to prove my earlier point, some **** head decided as war would not always be declared at oh gor blimey its early, they would go for a mid week mid evening call to arms. Which on the one hand is entirely logical, but equally completely oblivious to the true state of mind of the rank and file. As noted above...no ****er showed up.

Yours truly was quaffing with about 8 others in civvies in the Pilmuir Arms/Inn?? (once also a half decent chinese - long since demolished) and we were still quaffing at closing time - despite some unknown erk poking their head round the door and yelling "any RAF in here"

"No mate, they don't come here - try the Red Beastie".

As I recall a major sense of humor failure by the brass hats resulted, but no fallout landed on me. Oh happy days, where art thou?

[Pontius Navigator]

Re an Oh Christ Hundred callout. In Eastern Europe it would in theory be 2 hours late, say 0600 rather than 0400. Central Europe 0500 etc.

Now would anyone consider seriously that our Lords and Masters would actually react that quickly? Either they were burning the midnight oil, say 8pm, and could therefore have give the order before midnight for a leisurely response at first light or for a true 0600 EST start a UK start between 1000-1400 after morning coffee and due consideration :)

[OldAgeandTreachery]

TOFO
Had many a good evening in the Riverslea pub and an excellent meal in the chinese above. Thought the "Any raff in here" was apocryphal but having got it from the horse's mouth now: It can be retold with authority.
The evening we speak of The Abbey Inn, in the village, was deserted but the pubs of Forres did a roaring trade. Yep, rank stupidity but the lesson, for once, seems to have been learned.

[Haraka]

With the choice removed from the individual, anyone, fool or otherwise, can be made uncomfortable.

Shy Torque
I fully agree with you and having also worked supporting Rotary Wing, inc SHDetNI , always respected the way you guys "knuckled down " in supporting the Army in the field.
In contrast of course Harrier Force had a huge mobile support tail .
Indeed, watching one set of convoy packets moving out of Güt, I was amused by my Flight Sergeant's remark:

" So, where's the Piano?"

FYI I never lived in a tent on deployment (What? No chance!): having about a dozen box- bodied Bedfords (actually flat beds with ATRELs) , suitably modified by local Harrier RIC initiative. Hot showers, 24hr lighting if required , Aircon, Air beds on the floors, hot coffee at daybreak, our own self help in-house catering ( partly because we also looked after the HF cooks, helping them set up ) etc.etc.

We had in one song, based on "Yellow Submarine" the phrase:

"Ten, four-ton happy holiday homes on wheels"
("Backed up arse-to- arse, going nowhere fast")

Happy Days - 7 minutes of their flying time from the IGB.

I guess we wouldn't have lasted effectively more than a couple of days had IT happened.
.
.
.

(But we also had a contingency plan for that.....)

[Stitchbitch]

What fun we used to have at the secret Lincs airbase, shut in the PBF and surviving on microwaved meals and re runs of black adders private plane. How we used to laugh when we locked our favourite crews in the airlock as "there's an air raid on and we can't let you in...". :)

[MPN11]

I used to love those exercises, partly because I'm a pervert and partly because they tried to remind some of our people that they were actually in a fighting Service ;)

I had the pleasure/privilege of being IC Station DISTAFF at Waddington in V-Force days, and subsequently being a visiting PITA for 11 Gp Exercises at assorted locations. I can't have been that awful, though ... LU used to request my presence as DISTAFF when they held a SCOTADEX, so I must have done something right!

(Stories on request, cash donations to Poppy Appeal please)

[Pontius Navigator]

In the 60s, in Bomber Command, things were very simple. Startex was all hands to the wheel, about 5-6 hours after the start everyone flew off to dispersal with QRA plus one at main base and the odd post-service recovery flying off a couple of hours later.

Come tea time not a soul to be seen. Just about everyone off at dispersal and the bar still open for the off duty ops, atc and an engineer.

The order book was about 20-30 pages, if that.

[BEagle]

Then there was the time at Lossie when the nuclear survival rations were all issued forward.

OC Rats & Cats at Suphpholk's phinest phighter base was a wise old cove about such matters. So when the pre-positiong of post-strike austerity rations bit of the War Plan was reached, he dispatched catering sized cans of green beans....

....not even the groundcrew were tempted by them!


Being appointed as an exercise planner was wonderful licence for arranging suitable hooliganism. A query to the Reds revealed that they were due to transit back from Holland on the day of our Pratteval, so were quite happy to agree to my request to rush over Wattisham trailing smoke. We'd told Bluntishead whence they were coming and at what time, but even then they weren't intercepted by a single F-4. They caused mayhem; all ex-RAFG people yelled "Gas Gas Gas" in the approved manner and masked up; however, this was in the days of the S6 and no-one could hear what anyone else was saying. Down in the WOC, the Stn Cdr turned to the Gnd Def Cdr and said "Pass me the chemical defence section of the Station War Plan"....

"Err....there isn't one".
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN??""
"No chemical threat to the UK sir, 11 Gp have told us so"
"Well if the Reds can do it, so could the enemy - do something....NOW"

At which point we decided to close the incident and to raise it at the debrief, although I rang Red 1 to thank him for an excellent airfield attack which had fully met my aim.

At the debrief, when the Stn Cdr tried to belittle our carefully arranged 'chemical' attack by saying that there was no threat to the UK of such villainy, my trump card was to let him know that EX WINTEX, due in a couple of weeks, certainly did include such a threat. Whereupon he turned to Gnd Def Cdr and muttered "I trust you weren't planning on any leave in the next few weeks?".....:hmm:

But no-one queried why those blunt buggers at Neatishead had failed to intercept the incoming raid when they knew the precise time and direction of arrival of the 10 bright red Hawks coming from Holland on an international flight plan......:\

[Slow Biker]

Not so quiet at Waddington in October 1962. Just 3 months out of training I was informed this was no exercise. Or is my memory playing tricks?

[taxydual]

Slow Biker

When you've stopped pedalling, read this.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cuban_Missile_Crisis

[Slow Biker]

taxydual

The link tells all. My first sight of YS2, but I was too young and innocent to realize it was pretty serious.

[bosnich71]

Slow Biker.....October 1962. My first week ever on QRA at Bruggen,I thought it was S.O.P.

[Krystal n chips]

One of the benefits of being on 431 was the infamous yellow arm band....worn away from Bruggen as we usually were, and which offered complete protection against whatever the Warsaw Pact could throw at us !.

It also used to annoy those who were compelled to play of course

Sometime later, at the secret Lincs base adjacent to Horncastle, this time with 71 MU ( even if it had been rebranded by then ) we were impressed one night when they had a war....notably when a blackout was declared....and lo and behold, the lights on the domestic area did indeed go out.....there was but one small flaw however....looking towards the ramp and those large towers with lights on.....all glowing happily away.

HAS's were much more fun the second time around. You simply took your own provisions, shut the door, and remembered to hold the gas mask over your face when answering the phone......and it was amusing to watch our German colleagues at Memmingen doing exactly the same....

There were always the purists of course, who took these events rather seriously, in contrast to those of us who took a more realistic view....these little events were just a mid-week inconvenience between the weekend holidays....

[Skeleton]

RTB, Back Seat of a Jag to Lossie, not great weather but Lossie ended their passing of it with the announcement of the NBC state etc, first we knew that a call out had just occurred in our absence.

"Bugger that" says my driver, "tell them were diverting to Kinloss, weather."

"You tell them, because they will not fall for it"

"Mutter mutter" from front seat.

We landed at Lossie, and our luck continued as were deemed to have flown through the wrong type of cloud and were banished to the far end of the airfield to await De-contamination.

15 minutes felt like a lifetime as the front seat constantly reminded me we could have been enjoying lunch at Kinloss. :)

[MPN11]

TACEVAL, EGXW, "NBC White" on Tannoy but, of course, sniff tests had to be carried out.

As a caring person, I allowed certain pets to be allowed at work during exercises ... those owned by off-base singles who would otherwise have to be abandoned to their fate for several days.

I thus tasked a WRAF Cpl to perform the sniff test using her caged gerbil.

The TACEVAL Umpire present laughed loudly, and admitted that was a new one on him, as we happy unmasked.

[Ogre]

Once had a call out at an ungodly hour when I was on a training course at a certain training establishment outside Weston Super Mud. We'd been pre warned by the course staff the day before, as the entire class were all JT and above from other stations there had been a hypothetical discussion around what a wonderful place this training station was but in the event of a war we would of course have to return to our home units by the fastest route.

So when the hooter went off we rolled over and went back to sleep until breakfast time, whence we strolled down to the mess in civvies. When we got stopped by a shiney Flt Sgt who wanted to know what we were doing the response was "about 70 up the M5/M6 on our way back to Kinloss / Leuchars / Coningsby..."

Then there were the Tacevals at Lossie in the 80's, the first on the day of the raft race and the second when the entire station was boltholed because they were digging the runway up

Then at 7:30 the hooter went again to announce the exercise was suspended, and would resume after the normal days training was completed at 17:30. Funnily enough we finished early that day and were in Weston by 17:30...

[OldAgeandTreachery]

The mention of Memmingen brings back a memory whilst on 8Sqn. We were used by DISTAFF to test unit responses to a defecting Russian aircraft. With Soviet speakers on the sqn it gave a degree of authenticity to the exercise. Contact, approach and landing were carried out using them. We would be directed to a safe area of the airfield for interrogation. The crew on board would play a mixture of good Russkie and bad Russkie;it was up to the host force to find out who was who.

We deployed to Furstenfeldbruck on the Friday and spent a very enjoyable weekend in S Germany. I'd had a dodgy dinner on Sunday and was decidedly poorly throughout Monday.

Anyhoo, we landed at Memmingen, taxied in and shut down. As the AGE, I was allowed to deplane to fit the undercarriage locks then stand back to ensure no damage was caused to the airframe by overenthusiastic security staff.

Two of my groundcrew had volunteered to take part: One of whom was equipped with a pistol hidden in his groin area - a baddie!He was allowed to disembark
and was patted down by an armed guard;who missed the pistol. A little later he indicated to his guard that he desperately needed to relieve himself. Given permission, he turned his back, opened the zip of his flying suit and was withdrawing the pistol when he was spotted. The guard threw him face down, stood on his back then from a range of about two feet fired into him. There was a piercing scream from my man then stunned silence as the gathered throng realised what had just happened. Things happened very quickly from then: The scenario was shut down and my wounded man was attended to and taken to sick
quarters. Where he was treated.The offending article han't penetrated his skin so the area was cleaned and cream rubbed in and he was discharged!

We A/F and B/F'd the Shack and departed for Lossie only to find that they were on exercise and we were to be taking part! Trying their hand,the crew put in a call to Lossie Ops stating that they had, NODUFF, medical cases on board. One who had been shot and one suffering severe dehydration(me). Queried by Ops we confirmed our status and assumed we would be exempted the pain of a
Mineval.Not a frigging chance. Land, taxy to the tower where an ambulance will
take off your casualties;then continue to Sqn dispersal.

Me and my man were taken to SMC where the little rash around his wound had now spread all over his back. Turned out it was a reaction to the oil from the rifle.Other than more cream and the SMO threatening castration of the OIC at Memmingen,no further action was needed and afer filling me with salty liquid we were kept in overnight and sent home first thing with a sick note.Avoiding the rest of the mineval!

[Pontius Navigator]

TACEVAL, EGXW, "NBC White" on Tannoy but, of course, sniff tests had to be carried out

Of course in an exercise it is just a formality, right. Wrong.

Akrotiri the GDOC was in 5 Wg HQ on the road out of camp and shared with rocks and plods. NBC Black and the area the size of a large town all masked up. The All Clear was sounded and permission to unmask which everyone in the GDOC did without a thought.

Unfortunately the staish, Air Cdre Stacey, had let off tear gas canisters in the building.

At Endex, as we drove out the base, we saw every window open, curtains blowing in the wind. How we laughed.

[PARALLEL TRACK]

Rule 1 - never let the transport go.

Rule 2 - always eat when you can.

Rule 3 - the HAS or aircraft is always your friend.

[Geordie_Expat]

In 1977, someone, who should probably have known better, decided that 'static' units (ie non-flying) should be "Tacevalled".

So it came to pass that on my last duty day in the RAF I was duty NCO in the guardroom at Pitreavie Castle (I kid you not) when, at about 1900hrs or so, we were 'attacked' (one WO observer and two infiltrators, one male one female).

For those who don't know Pitreavie, it was a bloody great hole in the ground that (theoretically) could survive an overhead nuclear airburst by the 'upturned glass' principal and closing the huge steel doors.

Anyway, this exercise went on for a while, intruders captured, escorted up the long entrance road and released to start again. At one stage, the female intruder had been captured and brought to the guardroom, whereupon she disarmed the luckless RAFP guy, locked the door and held us all hostage. I was making coffee for the WO obs who was almost wetting himself trying not to laugh. Next thing we are lying on the floor, me thinking "I've got about twelve hours left in the RAF, what the hell am I doing?", when there is a bang and we are covered in bits of glass. My DSM, a Sgt, who had become guard commander, had decided if we are going to play silly bgrs. lets play ! So he had broken one of the windows, trained his rifle on the lass standing totally gobsmacked and told her to open the door, thereby we were liberated. I tell you, you couldn't make it up.

By this time I had just about had it so explained my situation to the OIC who let me go home on the 0800hrs bus back to Turnhouse. Probably thought (correctly) that I really wasn't taking it seriously.

One thing that did come out of it was that, although the underground complex was sealed off, there was a Lamsen tube connection to the Met office on the surface. One of the intruders (who obviously were experienced at this) had sussed this and sent a tube to Ops containing a bit of paper with the word Bomb written on it !!:ugh:

[langleybaston]

Rules for over 60s:

1. never trust a fart
2. never waste an erection
3. never pass up a bog-break.

[MPN11]

We were used by DISTAFF to test unit responses to a defecting Russian aircraft. With Soviet speakers on the sqn it gave a degree of authenticity to the exercise.
Ah, the "Defector" game. :ouch:

I engineered one for a Station Maxeval. It arrived a week or two before the event, when the Station was at an enhanced Alert State [I can't recall the exact terminology, but you know which one I mean]. It was part of a slow build-up to "Day One", and which most people seemed to ignore!

Anyway. The aircrew were all friendly. So friendly, in fact, that one of them even had the Raid Plan for the first day of the Maxeval in his Nav Bag (kindly provided by myself, just to see what would happen).

Nothing happened. I don't know whether the bag was never searched, or just ignored as a piece of "Exercise paper", but the raids happened exactly as scheduled, with everyone being surprised by attacking aircraft :)

[Pontius Navigator]

We had a delightful minival at Alconbury. The first the Base Commander knew was when he saw us trundling slowly down his runway. We were met by a follow me vehicle and guided around the airfield.

The Base Commander then did us the honour of inviting us to the debrief.

Naturally they should have bottled us up and got us out of the aircraft. He then told his fire chief, a Top Master Sergeant or something that he should use his fire trucks as blocking vehicles.

The Sgt replied that he was not about to risk his $100,000 trucks thus proving he had a firm grasp of the inessentials and never seen the big picture

Very illuminating.

[Wensleydale]

We were used by DISTAFF to test unit responses to a defecting Russian aircraft. With Soviet speakers on the sqn it gave a degree of authenticity to the exercise.


We did hear a rumour that the Soviet Embassy formally objected to the dayglow stars added to the shack for these exercises.... this one was taken heading for Colt. The offending star is under the beam window.


http://www.8squadron.co.uk/history_images/shack_jag_lg.jpg

[MPN11]

I like the picture of the Jag trying to keep up ;)


Hat/coat/taxi

[ShyTorque]

During a TACEVAL on an extremely windy day in northern Germany, our squadron electricity supply was soon "knocked out" by "injects" and everything was running on a big portable standby generator located between our hangars. On leaving the main hangar by the rear door, on my way to lunch, I spotted a large round, drab olive painted, metal object lying in the grass immediately adjacent to the path. To me, it looked suspiciously like a "land mine" of some sort, obviously put there to cause further chaos, possibly to deny access to the generator. I reported it to Ops, whereupon the duty Rockape was sent to investigate. He came back shortly afterwards, confirming my suspicion. The hangar evacuation plan was immediately put in motion. I went to lunch, which was my original destination, taking an alternative route....

The incident soon caused much confusion and consternation amongst the TACEVAL team, because it turned out not to be an "exercise inject" of theirs. The plot thickened, which caused further planned exercise scenarios to be abandoned.

The item turned out to be the metal air filter cover from the big generator, which had vibrated loose and been blown by the strong wind, like a frisbee, fifteen metres across the grass! ;)

[Lyneham Lad]

Have been following this thread and am surprised no-one has mentioned 'Micks' & 'Micky Finns' a la Scampton mid/late Sixties. I arrived there fresh from Boy Entrant training and the first time the hooter/tannoy went at some ungodly hour, it was a choice between jumping into my hairy blue and hightailing it to the hangar or to spend my last four minutes on earth in bed... (They never announced such things as 'Exercise' until later in the game).

My first Mickey Finn saw us crammed into a Whistling Tit and despatched to Kinloss. Return post-Ex was on a Hastings. We disembarked at Scampton to be greeted with the news that another Hastings had crashed with the loss of all on-board. (Incorrect assembly of elevator controls?).

There was a feeling at times that 'Micks' were sometimes called to generate frames in an attempt to meet that month's flying hours target. Could have been disgruntled 'rumour control' at work of course due to the frequency of such activities. Scampton in general (at least amongst the ground-crew) was generally considered not to be a happy place but my eighteen months there gave me an interesting and educational introduction to being a 'rigger.' An experience I always looked back on in a very positive light.

[Pontius Navigator]

LL, lots of mentions just no names.

I remember the Hastings crash, in 1965 with a load of para on board.

Hastings were grounded world wide and crews grounded with them. We were at El Adem and a Hastings crew was attached to OC GD Flt - not happy bunnies.

[ricardian]

At Akrotiri 1965-67 there were no Tacevels or suchlike but there were 3 or 4 "base alerts". I worked in the commcen which ran 24/7 with 4 shifts. Upon "base alert" being called we simply moved to a 3 watch system with the watch on "day off" splitting into 3 and joining the other 3 watches; the ops room staff did the same. However, the squadrons (and there were a LOT of them) did their own thing and the messes found this very difficult to deal with.
The staish was a pint-sized Air Commodore with a double-barrelled name who became highly agitated whenever "shapes" were being shuffled around the Canberras. Always nice to be in the Ops Room "secure cell" watching the goings on thru the one-way glass!
Being a shift worker overseas meant working a 42 hour week, just as it was in the UK, whilst everyone else worked a 30 hour week (or less!)
I was also at RAF Driffield in 1962 when things got very tense and our USAF friends with their/our Thor missiles were a bit trigger-happy

[mopardave]

some years ago, an emergency services colleague of mine used to take great delight in telling me about his time in the M.T......mainly in RAFG in the early '80s. During one taceval, he reckoned he turned over in bed in his mq and went back to sleep when the balloon went up. For another, when he was single, he'd just got back to the accommodation in the early hours. TACEVAL kicks off......unfortunately, he'd been dancing the night away to Boney M and assorted sh*t euro disco pop and his feet were rather swollen. He had to spend most of the TACEVAL wearing cowboy boots! Then there was the time he and his partner in crime borrowed the staish's staff car....complete with flags. The SWO did a double take as he wafted by in the rear of said staff car!


Having devoured this thread, I now know for certain that he wasn't bullsh*tting me! And they reckon firefighters are miscreants!!


Brilliant thread!!
MD:ok:

[Pontius Navigator]

Richardson The staish was a pint-sized Air Commodore with a double-barrelled name who became highly agitated North Lewis I presume.

[MPN11]

Then there was the time he and his partner in crime borrowed the staish's staff car....complete with flags. The SWO did a double take as he wafted by in the rear of said staff car!There was a time at a Scottish fighter base where, at the debrief, I suggested to the Stn Cdr that swanning around the stn with pennant flying in his shiny car in a 'wartime scenario' might make him a prime target for intruders.

I was pleased to note that on the next exercise he was in a rag-top SWB LandRover, otherwise I would have engineered his 'exercise demise' :)

[Pontius Navigator]

MPN, Stacey at Akrotiri used a white landrover with silver hand rails in the back so that he would be noticed. One exercise NEAF kept track of him sending Canberras from 39 to watch him.

Next time his landrover was camouflaged, Vulcan grey/green and high gloss. Asked why by a mate off 56, he explained that at first he needed a white landie so the troops would get to know him. Once they had he went tactical.

[mopardave]

langleybaston

Rules for over 60s:

1. never trust a fart
2. never waste an erection
3. never pass up a bog-breakI wish I'd taken a bog break prior to reading this.....off to get some clean duds! Thanks LB!!

MD
:ok:

[Tashengurt]

According to Taceval scenarios Balmullo was full of Soviet sleepers just waiting to run amok on Leuchars if the balloon went up.
Personally, I never trusted the ladies in the feeders!

[dkh51250]

Lyneham Lad, I am so pleased that your recollection is the same as mine. My working life started at Waddo in the 60s, and like you, my memory is that at no time was it ever mentioned that it was an exercise when the hooter went. I mentioned this on another thread on here and was flamed. Perhaps we were living in a parallel universe?

My plan as to how I spent my last four minutes involved a sprint to "Manchester" block as the WRAF accommodation was called at that time. Scampton did not have the luxury of females on camp in those days.

[ricardian]

Pontius Navigator - yes, 'twas he! Rather a short-tempered chap

[Pontius Navigator]

dkh, what was said by the girls doing the off base callout was often "an Irish gentleman has come and called." The exercise names were classified Restricted but never-the-less not bandied around as parts of the exercise were Secret.

There were not enough exercise rounds so warshot were loaded on Mickey Finn and then off loaded before dispersal. On Mick it was warshot all the way.

When fully generated on a Mick almost the whole force was ready at 15 minutes, fully armed and go bags issued.

Pick the wrong moment and you could have started WW3.

[Wander00]

Could start a whole thread about exercises at B...k on the bump in the early eighties, well "ground" side any way. All exercise injects Erie well planned, and as distaff I learned as much a I "taught". Included letter bombing and hoax phone calling the stash, and a Taceval Pt 1 that started not at 00silly but 1220 (apparently idea was to catch staish napping and thus engineer change at the top). However, station entire for it at and passed. Another poster on here will know what went on in the higher echelons, but at my level it was all good natured, and quite good fun. Thought we had seen the end of polythene NBC shelters until w saw film of the Ebola clinics in W Africa last year. Maybe they would have worked.

[MPN11]

My working life started at Waddo in the 60s, and like you, my memory is that at no time was it ever mentioned that it was an exercise when the hooter went.
When a certain Vulcan Sqn Cdr complained at the Debrief that it had taken him over an hour to determine whether it was an exercise or not, the Stn Cdr very reasonably replied "And what difference should that make, Chris?"

and a Taceval Pt 1 that started not at 00silly but 1220
OMG, we had one of those too. It was utter mayhem, with people trying to get vehicles off the station and then get back in again on foot, and nobody in the right place anywhere! IIRC it was well over an hour before the 'normal rhythm' was established!

[Akrotiri bad boy]

Late '80's Harrier deployments were all termed Exercise H.... F..... , for instance Hard Frost.
It was during Horrendous Farce that I was quietly settling in to my pup tent for the night, whittling something from solid, listening to the hairy pigs snuffling round the mess tent when a Landy approached the site with lights on full beam. As it swept round the site hides were lit up, bomb stacks illuminated, and fuel bunds washed with light.
"TURN THOSE LIGHTS OFF!" was yelled from the OC's pitch
The Landy continued its path around the site
"TURN THOSE RUDDY LIGHTS OFF!" Yelled the OC now sprinting towards the Landy.
The hide was plunged into darkness.
Spudoooosh!!!!!
"TURN THOSE BLASTED LIGHTS ON NOW!"
The MT driver obeyed and lit up the disturbing sight of the OC in the slop trench behind the mess tent, up to his medals in cold beans and bacon fat.:D
The Land Rover and driver escaped in the ensuing laughter and despite an APB across the Sennelager ranges was never found. End Ex

[Pontius Navigator]

MPN 11, Charlie Lima perhaps?

At Waddo my brief was to get sqn cdrs as high up the batting order as possible. As soon as an aircraft came up they were banished to dispersal on the far side and Bootsie' s hair.

Double points if I got two on Echo and doubled again if I got all three.

[MPN11]

Bullseye, PN :cool:

[Pontius Navigator]

MPN, one of the good guys, he couldn't believe they were daft enough to make him an air cdre.

[dkh51250]

PN looking at what he achieved in saving a certain Lancaster, it should have been a foregone conclusion.

[4mastacker]

Tashengurt wrote:

According to Taceval scenarios Balmullo was full of Soviet sleepers just waiting to run amok on Leuchars if the balloon went up.
Personally, I never trusted the ladies in the feeders!

..and the shock troops came across from Dundee on a Saturday night, fortifying themselves in the Commie and Hendies before starting their onslaught on the station's hospitality facilities (aka Eagle Club, Cpl's Club, or, for the less "refined", 892's accommodation block).

[Pontius Navigator]

When I was at Kinloss the staish had the whole area sewn up tight. Spies at Inverness and then Aberdeen would tip him off when the team arrived.

One exercise he invited the local Army units to run an exercise in Rosisle Forrest. The Army were non-players but that didn't stop them operating OPs. The Taceval intruders couldn't move an inch without their movements being called in.

[MPN11]

WIWAK ... that's a new one, PN :)

[AirtrackIdentFEnter]

I recall at Buchan in the 80s an 11Gp 'active edge' being called in the middle of the night. 80% of manpower duly generated and then everyone off to the bar to 'celebrate'. Then just as one was settling down in bed hours later the hooter going off again for a Taceval Part 1! 80% duly generated and Combat ready TOKs undertaken with a massively sore napper. Heady days:}

[OldAgeandTreachery]

PN
Wasn't that the one where the intruders had to be dropped by 202 sqn within the airfield bounds? Only to be rounded up by the QRF within minutes.

I recall one where the DISTAFF complained that the guard force were not "robust enough" with their challenges. Next Nimrod returning from an exercise sortie: Guards at the rear door challenging every crew member for ID and one of the crew making friends with a rifle butt after being a little "awkard".
Guard Force were now "too robust".

After a very early morning hooter the linies on shift had responded admirably and put the road barriers out (One set across the gap between No 1 hangar and Supply on the main arterial road) Staish leaps into his 1800 and heads from his house to Ops and drives straight into the unlit and as yet umanned barrier. One 1800 to MTSS. On the same exercise the Staish drove out of the main gate and hit a car travelling on the main road, driven by the NAAFI Wagon lady. 1800 no 2 to MTSS. I think this was his first "Eval" at Kinloss!

[Tashengurt]

Looking back now some 20 years later, it seems ridiculous how normal it was to be woken at 3am by a blaring air raid siren on any random weekday and just walk out the door for three days.
The second Mrs Tashengurt wouldn't stand for it!

[Pontius Navigator]

OA&T, not sure, could have been the one where I sat in the Fire Section all booted and spurred for 12 hours a day until reality kicked in and we reasoned that we would have 45 min warning for our task so just laid back and let it wash over us.

On Helicopter intrusion, we were at Binbrook with the Shack, and as with the Shack things got well behind the drag curve and our intrusion went well into dark.

As it was wrapping up one of the distaff came and whispered sweet words in our ears. Listen he said, a 22 sqn Sea King is going to do an insertion of studes from Finningley.

Anyway the Blue Thunder whisper machine slipped silently over the boundary in pitch dark. Intruders dropped off it roared skywards and then went hopping around the airfield with further spoof drop offs. The SRF was run ragged.

My brother-in-law, then a junior techie, confessed he just about sh^t himself.

Good fun had by all :)

[denachtenmai]

In the mid 60's at Wyton we thought that Mick's and Micky Finn's were magic because the Tannoy always ended with the words "51 Squadron exempt":E
Regards, Den,
(who never participated in any such exercises because I was also at Honington on 204 who were also excused) :ok::ok:

[MPN11]

Anyway the Blue Thunder whisper machine slipped silently over the boundary in pitch dark. Intruders dropped off it roared skywards and then went hopping around the airfield with further spoof drop offs. The SRF was run ragged.

hahaha ... nice tactic!

XW [again] ... and 7SOS did a silent insertion with a C-130. As SATCO, I had to be told for safety reasons, but it was the middle of the night anyway so no problem. Not that I ever saw/heard anything, of course, until ...

Well, let's put it this way. The various naughty people fanned out from the middle of the runway and caused appropriate chaos and mayhem all over the Station. It would appear one of their targets was ATC, as some headed our way, but as they set off a load of our trip flares* it seems they decided to leave us alone. :cool:


* For those unfamiliar, XW Local was in a separate 2-story control tower in the middle of the airfield. Very lonely and vulnerable, so I decided it shouldn't be :D

[Pontius Navigator]

Just remembered a Red Can to Benbecula. Quite normal, handled well, no dramas until . . .

It was all over and I went to the Ops building pitching up at the door in a pseudo Russian flying suit and appropriate Russian rank. Due to lack of comms no one had told ops the incident was over. Guard had kittens and Ops was prepared to surrender :)

[Pontius Navigator]

Just been reminded of something and connecting with what ORAC said about Russian intentions on the Lightning thread.

Tome down hit the UK big time in 1973 with pretty blue and yellow being replaced with mucky green cloak of invisibility and reflective yellow for visibility. Hangar doors were painted green and white window frames painted green too. Shares in the Green Paint company would have soared.

Stn Cdr at Wittering demanded that DOE (Destroyers of Everything) paint the hangar doors green. They did; emerald green. Germany had all the tone down green. Went well with the staish's red complexion.

Then for Tacevals we had blackout. Now it might have worked for real but just had the effect of creating black holes - bomb here. Except both schemes had one tiny little floor.

On a long range bomber every thing is black and green and missiles see nothing at all. The powers that be totally forgot the advances in blind bombing since the 1940s.

PS

On an associated note, Ordnance Survey mapping of the 60s and before showed blank areas where there were airfields. Then, as more and more airfields went in to C&M the surveyors added the buildings, roads, taxiways and runways. Some bases had only gone into C&M as part of the Cold War buildup so perfectly detailed mapping of the prime targets was available to anyone for 6/8d.

[Shackman]

Mid 80s - Marham - one that sticks in the mind.

Was tasked with mighty Wokka to pick up some paras from Aldershot (in itself an adventure worth telling) and deliver them to Marham at about midnight. Paras had gone to town - all dressed in Spetsnaz kit, AK47s and plenty of blank ammunition - only they hadn't actually told the taceval team about that bit! We arrived on time, lights out and on goggles for a 'tactical' insertion, and put the troops out near to an active HAS, which they immediately assaulted because the gate was open. Apparently the engineers' faces were a sight to behold as a load of Russian SF all firing in the air bore down on them - they bolted into the HAS leaving all the doors open and mayhem ensued. In the meantime we hopped across the airfield doing a couple of dummy drops, overflying at low level a couple of RAFP and their dogs at which point the crewman on the ramp threw out a couple of thunderflashes - apparently it was 24 hours before they found the dogs (or may be the other way round!).

By now the pandemonium had reached fever pitch with 'armed intruders' running riot - they had captured a bus full of aircrew driving round the peritrack to go to dinner (617 ?) thanks to centralised messing, put dummy bombs on all the Victor Ts and the Taceval team were having kittens. We went back to pick the troops up at endex and were declared persona non grata! All in a day's work!

[MPN11]

Then for Tacevals we had blackout. Now it might have worked for real but just had the effect of creating black holes - bomb here. Except both schemes had one tiny little floor.

On a long range bomber every thing is black and green and missiles see nothing at all. The powers that be totally forgot the advances in blind bombing since the 1940s.
How true.

What ever happened to dummy airfields? Or dozens of assorted radar reflectors to fill the blank space an airfield represents? Or indeed obscuring/confusing your [not]friendly regional radar IPs?

[The Old Fat One]

Looking back now some 20 years later, it seems ridiculous how normal it was to be woken at 3am by a blaring air raid siren on any random weekday and just walk out the door for three days.

That's because 80% of the time it was ridiculous. Shortly after we gave up on that nonsense, some **** invented, "lets all practice camping at the weekend".

It was right about then that I grew up and started thinking about a proper job.

[MAINJAFAD]

Mid 80s - Marham - one that sticks in the mind.

Was tasked with mighty Wokka to pick up some paras from Aldershot (in itself an adventure worth telling) and deliver them to Marham at about midnight. Paras had gone to town - all dressed in Spetsnaz kit, AK47s and plenty of blank ammunition - only they hadn't actually told the taceval team about that bit! We arrived on time, lights out and on goggles for a 'tactical' insertion, and put the troops out near to an active HAS, which they immediately assaulted because the gate was open. Apparently the engineers' faces were a sight to behold as a load of Russian SF all firing in the air bore down on them - they bolted into the HAS leaving all the doors open and mayhem ensued. In the meantime we hopped across the airfield doing a couple of dummy drops, overflying at low level a couple of RAFP and their dogs at which point the crewman on the ramp threw out a couple of thunderflashes - apparently it was 24 hours before they found the dogs (or may be the other way round!).

By now the pandemonium had reached fever pitch with 'armed intruders' running riot - they had captured a bus full of aircrew driving round the peritrack to go to dinner (617 ?) thanks to centralised messing, put dummy bombs on all the Victor Ts and the Taceval team were having kittens. We went back to pick the troops up at endex and were declared persona non grata! All in a day's work!

I heard the story of that one as a very young JT on the first Minival I was involved in 5 days after passing out of Trade Training (though the guy who told me it said it was at Honnington). The story included the fact that just as he landed the pilot of the Chinook came up on the radio and said "Hello Comrades, I'm carrying some people who are very interested in your country!!!".

[FantomZorbin]

Back in the 60's. Turned up at Binbrook on a pre-arranged visit to find a very quiet camp and not much joy around! On arriving at our destination section we asked "why 'The Atmosphere'?" Overnight the OO had been presented with a signal in the early hours and, having misread it, called out the station! Regrettably, because there had been no inkling of a forthcoming exercise, only a handful of airframes were found to be 'S'. The hapless OO practised that art for a long time afterwards.:{

[Army Mover]

Not sure why, but we used to hide in our Army office at Gutersloh during Station exercises, tacevals etc. We'd get all dressed up for the occasion, rush up to Bielefeld to get our weapons, but that was about it.

On one such day the Staish was doing a tour of the terminal (I think they were practising evacuating dependants), when he walked in our office. "Hello", he said, "who do you belong to?". I explained that we were based in the terminal, but had no active role in the exercise. He found it all very interesting and the next morning our own CO phoned up and told us he had "donated" us to the RAF during Station exercises etc and from now on, subject to real work commitments, would make ourselves available, as required by the Station Commander.

Much more fun than hiding in the office. :E

[langleybaston]

Just a thought: given a substantial amount of whingeing above about TACEVAL, MAXEVAL, MINEVAL amongst the more favourable reminiscences, just how were we supposed to prepare for war?

Short of the use of live rounds and a little light radiation, they seemed to me to have a serious purpose and a useful outcome.

Was there a viable alternative?

"Our job is to prepare for war in peace" I think it said at the Brueggen gate.

My recollection is that we won, did we not?

[MPN11]

No argument from here, langleybaston, and I suspect those in RAFG tended to be slightly more focussed!

But certainly, IME, there was a wide swathe of apathy and, indeed, resentment towards the entire process ...

March in the Accused ... the horn had gone about 45-60 minutes previously, and having ensured my guys were up to speed I went walkabout. Strolling down the road from the Sgts Mess came a chf tech in blue uniform! When I asked him what he was doing, and where he was going, he said "nn Squadron". When asked why it had taken him so long to get going, he nonchantly replied "Had a shower and a shave first". I invited him quite forefully to double all the way to his workplace, which probably negated the value of his leisurely shower.

With attitudes like that, it was always going to be an uphill struggle.

[Pontius Navigator]

LB, I think an answer should have been more realistically than we did some of the time. My comment on universal tone down and black out in UK was a case in point, pointless. Masking tape on windows? Practise bleeding when it might have been more sensible to disperse key personnel off base (at home).

Issuing weapons but never blanks and BFU except to a small number of personnel.

MPN, otoh, at Waddo at one point we had a carefully worked out bomb loading system. OC Arm Eng planned that a number of his bomb loading teams would response at H+3 or so, coming in rested as the bulk of the generation occurred. The evaluators need to measure recall rates so regardless they all had to respond by H+1.

Basically a one-size fits all approach.

However in Cyprus a Taceval was called when we were already at a high security alert. The Taceval team had kittens when the staish, Stacey, said he was not going to mix live armed guards and exercise personnel with no ammunition, so we were all issued with live rounds. Now that was realistic. Not only that, but I slept in my own bed as well

[langleybaston]

Thank you for replies.

Just had a question pop to the forefront of the several brain-cells remaining:

Were UK TACEVALS run and assessed by NATO teams?

Although I have experienced a fair number on UK bases, they seemed a bit half-arsed compared with those in AFCENT and AFNORTH ......... for these latter I was variously poacher and gamekeeper.

[threeputt]

Mr MetO, no they were planned and run by the UK TACEVAL team based at HQ STC.

3P:ok:

[RAFEngO74to09]

langleybaston,

TACEVALs conducted on RAF bases in the UK were under the auspices of the relevant NATO HQ: HQ UK AIR then HQ AIRNORTHWEST (both physically located at RAF High Wycombe) then CC Air Ramstein.

In HQ UK AIR and HQ AIRNORTHWEST era, there were only about 10-12 full-time NATO members with the Team Chief being a RCAF lt col and the Logistics Area Chief being an RAF wg cdr.

In the CC Air era, the Team Chief was a Belgian Air Component lt col and the Logistics Area Chief was a Belgian Air Component lt col with a full-time RAF WO assistant. The was also a RAF wg cdr alternate Team Chief (for any nation other than the UK) and, above them, a RCAF col in charge of the TACEVAL Division.

On all teams, one of the permanent NATO staff members was appointed as the Project Officer for each evaluation and he co-ordinated the provision of augmentee evaluators from all member nations through each TACEVAL National Representative (NATREP) office - typically 120 rising to 200 (including about 1/3 under training and OPFOR) in the multi-sector Deployed Operating Base era (such as the German Air Force events set up at Neubrandenburg with everything moved in by road / rail).

[Pontius Navigator]

3p, like he said, half . . . :)

The biggest difference between NATO and National for the NATO ones I did was UK could start at O'dark hundred and ran non-stop 24/24


In the NATO ones the team didn't start to assembly until normal start work and maybe even Tuesday. They ran 12 on 12 off on the basis that their manning would be doubled by UK reinforcements. Not sure that this would have been strictly true.

Also would quiz troops on the ground. We found RAF Police on barrier duties for 12 he straight.

[MPN11]

MPN, otoh, at Waddo at one point we had a carefully worked out bomb loading system. OC Arm Eng planned that a number of his bomb loading teams would response at H+3 or so, coming in rested as the bulk of the generation occurred. The evaluators need to measure recall rates so regardless they all had to respond by H+1.
Sensible plan, over-ridden by bureaucracy :)

Were you there when they were loading shapes in dense fog during a Part 1? The convoys can't be stopped, so ATC Local was actually doing live controlling of the movements in ZERO visibility!
"c/s 1, have you passed the PAR yet?" "What's that?" "Big green box on a turntable on your right" "Yes" "C/s 2, clear to move to <location>"

When the Staish called me in Local on my 'private field telephone' to Ops, he asked why the loading was going so slow, and by implication blaming ATC. I politely invited him to step out of the Ops Bunker and look at the 5 yard visibility. He said no more on the subject ... a very good Staish was "Big John' ;)

[Dougie M]

In the early 70s I was on Ops Sqn at "Dusseldorf Weeze" as Ryanair calls it. There were random tests of reaction to messages throughout the day. O.C. Wraf deemed that the night shift being a non sleeping phase, her gels could do nights. We nevertheless dossed down for a few hours on safari beds in our own sections. One very early morn the comms kit came to life with lights and bells. "Keys to the bridge" I yelled and leapt out of the maggot. As the dual control was activated I noticed that the rest of the team was clad in a Wraf cardie and IIRC shell pink bra and panties. At this point the door opened and in came the 2ATAF Taceval team and the Staish. Well what could I say. The team leader Wg Cdr L* T***** said "We are satisfied with the response time and will retire till your staff have recovered their composure. Took some living down.

[Pontius Navigator]

Dougie, reminds me, the delightful ops assistant (clerks in those days) used to respond to Micks in the most delightful collection of garments.

One call out I stupidly asked why. They said that that way the knew they would be sent back to change, they could then wash, shower etc and return.

Sadly, after my curiosity the word went round and they afterwards always came in blues. I had meant no rebuke, honest.

[Wander00]

2100-ish Sunday evening at Worthy Down where, at the time I was the sole light blue -siren goes, I crash into DPM and pitch into my RP - I am the ONLY person in anything like uniform - so the colonel (also in plain clothes) - puts me in charge. Could hardly stop grinning - turned out to be a harmless (but smelly) sports bag left by a car by someone coming back off weekend.

[FantomZorbin]

Whilst trotting around a station on Distaff duties, I noted how many scrappy bits of A4 with 'Sandbags' written on them were adorning all the windows. Translating the areas to be covered into numbers of bags required was revealing!
I happened on a 'Field Service Pocket Book 1914' where there is listed a table of time/men/tools for various tasks. It transpired that the station would still be filling the bags even now ... always assuming we could have got hold of the Nation's supply of sand!! :uhoh:

[Wander00]

When an officer in RCT TA I had an "Officers Pocket book" in which you could find, amongst other things, the tables giving the fodder requirements of various numbers of mules, this in 1979/80

[Pontius Navigator]

FZ, quite.

On the basis that attacks in modern warfare would be directed more accurately on military targets it would have been more sensible to reduce on-base manning to that required for operations and to disperse off-duty personnel and billet livers-in in local hotels.

Unless of course they thought people might have been inclined to desert.

[ORAC]

MINEVAL at Neatishead in 70s.

Distaff stops Cpl in corridor and pins piece of paper saying "exercise fire" on a door. "What are you going to do about that?, he asks Cpl.

Cpl whips out notebook and pen, scribbles "Exercise water" on it and pins on top of first piece of paper and walks away.

--------------------------

Sitting in crew room in R30 (above ground box from which we "defended" the UK for over 20 years whilst the bunker awaited refurbishment. Thunder flash goes off outside window and voice shouts "bomb". 30 seconds later DISTAFF walk through door and, incandescent, demand to know why we haven't responded or called the GDCC.

Turning page of paper laconic Flt Lt replies, "Its a plywood wall, we're all f**king dead".

Unfortunately the brought us back to life....
...............................

On a more serious note, I was a NATO observer at a CENTO exercise in Turkey at Diyarbakir in 1977. Several items worthy of mention.

One of the sites liable to inspection was the remote radar head for the CRC up in the mountains. When asked for a team to visit the Turks explained it would take 24 hours to put together a convoy with tanks and guards to get there safely in case of a PKK attack. When asked when the last time this had occurred they replied 2 weeks previously. It was decided that, in the circumstances, their security was probably up to scratch and a visit was unnecessary.

We were informed that, if we noticed any breaches of regulations we were to note them and pass them to the team lead, not to mention them to the Turks. It was explained that, the year previously, a DISTAFF member had found a guard asleep and had to shake him awake. He mentioned it in passing to the Turkish guard commander - who had the soldier in question put in front of a firing squad and shot for dereliction of duty in the face of the enemy - and not with blanks.

[Wander00]

Again, Neatishead, 1984, Aunty Joan is Stn Cdr. I have arrived as a pretend sqn ldr (posting in an promotion a couple of months in the future, but she did a deal with my boss at the Towers, Bobby Robson.) So there I am, ground defence controller on a station I have been at for about 15 minutes, my predecessor has pushed off I know not where, and I know no one and nothing, and incomes an inject of "Fire at the Tx site"! Having ascertained Tx site is 5 mile north and we have one fire engine on the unit and there is a civilian fire engine not far from the Tx site - I cpx civil fire crew to attend. About 5 minutes later this gp capt I have never met storms into the GDOC. "Squadron leader, if there is a fire on my station it has adjectival flames coming from it. Send the real fire engine!" "yes, Ma'am". I have met Aunty Joan.


1800hrs that nigh, shift change. I sit there listening to all this incomprehensible fighter controller stuff; the Stn Cdr announces me to give the ground defence brief. "Station Commander, Ladies and Gentlemen, so far I have not understood a thing. I hope I do better." Roars of laughter led by Stn Cdr. Start of a wonderful 18 months

[Wensleydale]

The Turks have (had?) a different approach to discipline. Rumour control at Geilenkirchen at the end of the 1980s told of a guard at the NATO AWACS forward operating base at Konya who was also shot for sleeping on duty - it was thought that a Turkish officer had the authority to shoot up to two conscripts per year. In a separate incident, one of the NATO aircrew was rifle butted - quite seriously - by a guard when returning to Konya base for being too slow to show an ID card.


Each of the different nations at NATO Air Base Geilenkirchen had its own National Support Unit, responsible for discipline of its own nationals. Every Friday, the Col in charge of the Turkish contingent would hold a parade and if necessary would issue corporal punishment with his leather belt. It sort of puts the bullying instructor thread into context....

[Pontius Navigator]

Thunder flash goes off outside window and voice shouts "bomb". 30 seconds later DISTAFF walk through door and, incandescent, demand to know why we haven't responded or called the GDCC.

Mickey Finn, Waddo 1967. Hugely successful generation, well over the required generation and the force scrambled from dispersed bases all round UK.

We entered the nuclear fallout phase but didn't report the fallout as the the first bomb was directly overhead. We were told not to be silly and get on with it.

I typed up the full tale just now and then found I was repeating it exactly as posted 6 years ago:

http://www.pprune.org/military-aviation/398209-raf-tactical-nuclear-missions-3.html

[SAMXXV]

Apologies to the Tornado crews at LBH from 1998-1990. I was initially the Strike Controller, then after I discovered what a boring & "read from the card" job it was became the daylight Attack Controller.

I controlled (?) the tasking of 48 jets during conventional ops, reliant on ATOC Maastricht sending tasking in a timely manner to LBH via secure telecoms. More often than not those telecoms refused to work. That meant that tasking had to be passed by voice over the American supplied "Stu II" secure telephone (Crap -& I hope the current system works, wherever in the world it is now!). The audio qualities of Stu II left a lot to be desired..... I was spending over 10 minutes writing down the each ATO whilst 2 or 3 squadrons were desperately waiting to arm & plan. In the meantime, previous sorties had returned & had idle armourers. This led to numerous Sqn bosses deciding to, quite rightly, order their teams to load LGBs instead of dumb 1000 pounders rather than sit there doing nothing.

The lack of information flow & late ATO's from the ATOC was as palpable as the TOTAL lack of training that I received from either SOPSO or OCOPS. I received not a single visit to any of the 4 squadrons to meet or speak to the auths/Warlords in my 2 years at LBH. The Stn Cdr G McR was a total waste of space on the "Bridge".

Has anything changed 26 years later?

[MPN11]

Whilst trotting around a station on Distaff duties, I noted how many scrappy bits of A4 with 'Sandbags' written on them were adorning all the windows. Translating the areas to be covered into numbers of bags required was revealing!
Ah, you too!!

I was doing a staff visit at a certain West Country TWU, when I encountered a similar scenario in their War Book. A couple of sheets of A4 and a smoking calculator later, I was able to suggest to OC Ops that the station's sandbag plan as described would actually take over 2 years to complete, working h-24/365 ;)

He was not amused.

[langleybaston]

Just had a fascinated re-read: it all seems long long ago, and I fear we are less ready now than in those days of the hooter and the pressure.

However, a side-note not, I think, covered by the above.

Met. Brief.
In RAFG our offices were all fully manned [no women] 24/7 and the call-out was a bit silly and indeed potentially disastrous, all eggs in one basket. Thus it rarely happened, I think SMetOs negotiated that with WingCO Ops.
We kept two parallel sets of documents ready on the old Banda duplicators: one was the usual local and NW Europe forecast and TAF lists, and one was Warsaw Pact pre-defined area and charts etc.
Thus we always knew very early in the tumult that peace had been declared: to brief WP weather to sleepy and startled customers due to fly in a NATO LFA would not have been a good idea.
I claim [boast] that I caused/invented the prep. of a WP set of Docs as routine by every shift [thus 3 times in 24 hours] rather than wait for Armaggedon. Thus Met. was a comparative oasis of calm once we had donned NBC gear. Always ate my snack before donning.

I think we were right to be frightened, and we still should be.