Infamous metmen/women

[langleybaston]

Here we go. I was one such Metperson.

I worked with/under/over some mighty characters, many of whom taught, or attempted to.

Some I learned from and admired. Ken Winspear " 100% more effort 10% better results, your choice". Topcliffe. Ended up a PSO. Dirty jokes told with all the appropriate gestures and accents. Top man.

John Dixon, SMetO Scampton in the last days of the V force. Said to have set up a race with a taking-off Vulcan, JD in his souped up Chevette [!] on the peri track. Result close.

Chris Chubb. Getting out of bed shagged him out, bags of style, cravat, and a dressing gown on the night-bind.

Ann Wiggins. Extraordinary top SMeto Church Fenton, sharp as a razor, took no prisoners, not easy being her boss but real value.

Harry Templeton. Ex-Swordfish aircrew WWII, relaxed boss at Guetersloh.

Effing George ....... Topcliffe, a legend in his own lunch time, shocked even his colleagues with his expletives. One per sentence minimum.

Mac Cameron, SMet Finningley many years, some 7 children, a very good teacher, and a very good boss. Said I would never get on, and did his best to make sure he was wrong.

Pete Tweed. Best briefer we ever had.

And we never found out who piddled in the rain gauge at Leeming.

[Flymee 2 Da Moon]

John Tucker at RAFC.

[4PON4PIN]

Vince ? at BZN '74-76 'ish

[Arfur Dent]

The lovely guy with the stutter at RAF Valley late 60's.

[langleybaston]

John Tucker very good cool and competent ..... it was my pleasure to be his boss, inspecting Cranwell was always a pleasure but I found little to complain about, waste of a day really!

I think the Valley man with stutter was KKKKKenny KKKKKemp? I had little to do with the western half of this sceptered isle until Cardiff/Bristol/Plymouth in the late 80s.

A succession of SMetOs at Linton failed to notice/ report that their anemo mast was 2 metres short, thus causing significant under-reading of wind speed. Ruddock, Hindley to name two. Outrage when I insisted we measured it! "Its been good enough all these years ........!" I borrowed a Chinook to airlift [slung] a spare mast from Cumbria, and the Linton dwarf went for scrap.

Oh! And I should also praise Peter jackson, Finningley, later SMetO Cranwell, also I think Wittering, with his passion for interesting cars driven too fast. Far too fast.

[ICM]

I can see the face but can't recall the name - one of the early TV forecasters who then turned up at Gan circa 1970. After ages of having seen him in his best civvies on the box, he looked a bit different in flip flops, shirt and shorts around 2am local in the hot and sticky forecast office down there.

[langleybaston]

Bert Foord could be the Ganman, he was one of the early TV blokes and he was an occasional overseas tourist ..... did Guetersloh for sure.

And I recall Jack Hulbert at Wyton in the 1970s ...... i/c probably the least modernised met office in the land, in the least modernised hangar. Biggest moustache in the organisation. Jack, that is, not the office or the hangar.

Dougie Farmer was at Waddington or Scampton, hard working and diligent, probably took over from the Wasps or Quins rugger player Glyn Owen.

[brakedwell]

Cu-nimb Charlie at 242 OCU Dishforth in 1957. His nickname was due to a prominent lump on the top of his bald head. He was an excellent climatology lecturer.

[30mRad]

Ken the Met at Linton around mid-90s - incredibley tolerant of trainee pilots stupidity!

Forget the name, but MetO at Lossie who wore outrageous ties.

[GOLF_BRAVO_ZULU]

langleybaston, am I missing something significant here? You describe yourself as an "infamous" Met wallah but then list a series of, clearly ace types.

My simple fish-head loggie mind interprets "infamous" as those that stand out as embarrassments to the trade.

:confused:

[CoffmanStarter]

Never saw our Met Man ... he was always hidden behind his seaweed :E

[thunderbird7]

Forget the name, but MetO at Lossie who wore outrageous ties.

I thought that was a pre-requisite for a met man? Certainly was at Church Fenton mid-eighties.... :}

[t7a]

Ian McCaskill - early 70's at Luqa.

[WASALOADIE]

More recently, (2004 - 2008ish) Grianne (hope the spelloing is right). Lovely lady, great sense of humour, very nice personality, wonderful Irish accent that melted the guys hearts, always smiling. We were sad to see her go.


Never forgetnight brief back in the early 90's (before IT briefs). Met man came accross drenched and placed his slides on the OHP, he turned to look at the screen and said "oh! sorry about the mess, I used a water soluble pen and didnt know it was going to rain" cue much laughter.

Then the black flag brief given by the met office. They produced some stats that disclosed that 45% of their forecasts were accurate. The question was asked "Why dont you reverse your forecasts and you will be accurate 55% of the time?" = 1 dumbfounded met man.

[langleybaston]

I was expecting/ hoping/ dreading the victims to come up with a few villains or twerps.

My personal blunders:

1. turning up at a night fly briefing, white stuff in hair and on shoulders, no white stuff in forecast.

and

2. "being gratuitously rude to the AOC in C's pilot in that you said
"sod off sunshine I am briefing a properly pre-booked captain and crew and I don't care whose pilot you are I'll get back to you!""

Standing interview, no coffee.

3. Being consistently and predictably wrong re. contrail levels for three whole years at Guetersloh ....... at my last brieifing the staish said it was a relief not to have to make the usual height corrections any more.

Re. the above: Linton Ken was probably Ken Dart, with black beard? The spectacularly outrageous tie to be seen these days is at Coningsby I believe.

[Union Jack]

I was wondering when you were going to 'fess up, LB - they do say that attack is the best form of defence.

Regarding:

1. turning up at a night fly briefing, white stuff in hair and on shoulders, no white stuff in forecast.

Seems fair enough - I never heard dandruff mentioned in a forecast ....:E

And I'm equally sure that you never had dandruff!:ok:

Jack

[brakedwell]

And I'm equally sure that you never had dandruff!

Thats because the adiabatic lapse rate was too low :8

[ShyTorque]

My personal blunders:
1. turning up at a night fly briefing, white stuff in hair and on shoulders, no white stuff in forecast.


I was going to quote that incident - were we at Gut at the same time (early 1980s) for that is where I experienced it, or a similar one!

How about the lovely Jan K. at Odiham who was asked to give a forecast, which she did. On the basis of that, the station snow clearance team were stood down for the weekend. Almost immediately afterwards it began to snow very heavily. About fifteen inches of the white stuff fell in a few hours, making the whole airfield, including the camp roads, impassable. What's more, it was so bad that the snow clearance team couldn't get back in because all the local roads were blocked. :p

The Linton Met man was taken to task by OC Ops one Sunday, for lighting a big smelly garden bonfire, which completely smoked the adjacent MQs out. The apologetic reply went along the lines of "Sorry, sir , I had no idea which way the wind was blowing.....!"

After your tale about the anemometer mast being too short, now we know why. And also why we poor studes found crosswind landings a bit tricky! ;)

[Busta]

Tiny Mentz, Midway Island detachments, and again in the Falklands. Top chap!

[langleybaston]

Tiny was OC Mobile Met Unit when he retired, either as S/Ldr or Wingco ...... the MMU guys collected more gongs than most, as they deployed here there and everywhere and often for unusually short detachments.

Did anyone suffer at the hands of Paddy Gilfedder? At FY he once offered Holme on Spalding Moor as the only good div ........... the site was sticking up out of the clag, had an observation, but no runway.

FY had the best set of assistants I ever had the pleasure to work with, including Ken Dart [see above].

[30mRad]

Linton Ken was probably Ken Dart
Yes - that's the chap, although I don't remember a black beard.

Harsh to mention, but MetOs failing to forecast is a theme....

Bruggen in the late 90s/early 00s had a rather large, Scottish lady forecaster and you could pretty much plan for the opposite and be safe!

[BEagle]

John Dixon, SMetO Scampton in the last days of the V force. Said to have set up a race with a taking-off Vulcan, JD in his souped up Chevette [!] on the peri track. Result close.

Was that the rather...'camp' chap who drove one of the rare Chevette 2300HS homologation specials?

Other met men:

- The dunce who persuaded the Domnie (the jet type!) squadron at Cranwell that the aerodrome would go out in fog - guaranteed. So they cancelled night flying, repaired to the pub and watched the twinkling stars....:( The MetO later admitted that he'd misplotted his tephigram - but the Dominie squadron didn't get another crack at night flying for a fortnight!

- The newcomer at Brawdy who hadn't been briefed on 'supersonic stratus' and other local quirks. His starring moment came when the gathering crowd asked "Any chance of snow today?", to be told "No - none!". "So is that white stuff gathering outside some mysterious new phenomenon?". Enter the Stn Cdr who greeted him with a cheery "Hello, Mac - have some actual!", then slung a snowball at him - it landed on his water-based lumocolour slides which then turned into a multi-coloured ruin.

- Griff-the-met who taught us at RAFC Cranwell. In those days the groundschool was down at the 26 threshold end, in wooden huts. One day, Plod declared bikini red, so the road was blocked solid. Griff eventually turned up and asked a chum "Have you seen the queue!". "Looks more like stratus to me, Griff", came the reply.

- And, of course, 'metman-with-waistcoats-of-many-colours' at Brize!

[B Fraser]

A colleague and I stopped in the rain at Abingdon to offer an RAF officer a lift to the building he was walking to some distance away. I was later taken to task for telling him to hop into the back when I should have in fact changed seats to allow him to sit in the front.

There may or may not have been a Met man who soon after built a nest under the ceremonial eagle on a plinth and slipped in a few hens eggs for good measure.

:O

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

Brawdy was fantastic for embarrassing met men. I remember late 80's, when the met man would remain in the windowless building for the half-hour between early & main briefing. He stood up once, forecasting gin clear, at which point one of the standing back row lifted a boot and tapped open the fire door. The back 3 rows disappeared in the fog which rolled in.

Fair dues. Next day he forecast ginners again, followed by an apologetic "Mind you, I said that yesterday."

[lurkposition]

Aaaaah, Helen McKenzie at St Mawgan. Now Helen Roberts,

[cuefaye]

Whoever they were, they were far better at forecasting (weather ships were useful) than the present crop. They used plain English (isn't the constant emphasising of words and phrases annoying?), and didn't flaunt about, theatrically. And they didn't cost us zillions, with satellites et al, all to no significant improvement in performance.

But some of the tottie is worth watching :)

[taxydual]

The 'Duck' at Leeming in the 70's.

2 inches of snow in 10 minutes followed by him issuing a 'Snow Warning' which muggins had to Tannoy. I was known as 'Snowy' for weeks.

Then, months later, the Met Office roof blew off and landed on the ASP. 10 minutes later 'Ducky' issued a 'Strong Wind Warning'. Guess who had to Tannoy that one! Correct, I was 'Windy' for weeks.

[Wander00]

Then there was McCloud at Cranwell in the 60's - forecast a gin clear day, as behind him through the windows we could see fog rolling across the airfield

[Lima Juliet]

Best forecasting ever by a Weather Girl...

http://www.toytownmunich.com/archive/scorchio.jpg

:ok:

[orca]

Somewhere in Biscay in 2002 - about 0900.

Met girl briefs 'Blue,White', but says that Green is a possibility later - when we question this she gets a little defensive and dismisses the possibility of Green. 'Ace' we say because we are off to go splash bombing. The met girl leaves our room at 0915. At 0920 the met office pipes (tannoys) 'Green, Green'. At 0930 the met office pipes 'Yellow 1' and at 0935 a Bag shuts down on deck because he can't see the ramp. Good job!

[chevvron]

Nazaneen Ghaffar (Sky News weekdays 6 -9; one of Eamon Holmes 'crumpet collection')

[langleybaston]

Was that the rather...'camp' chap who drove one of the rare Chevette 2300HS homologation specials?

I'd go for eccentric ........... and yes, thats the car. Lived in Doncaster, and drove to work via roundabout at Beckingham near Gainsboro. I lived near roundabout. On a quiet night the roar of the car under full steam was very distinctive. Distinctive enough for me to phone him once: "Dixon, were you spectacularly late for the morning shift, or ditto early for the evening?". "Admin day boss!".

He always answered phone "S Met O, YES YES!".

[langleybaston]

Dave Duck was a local farmer first and a met man second, in his mind. He was a bit too near a nuclear test earlier in life, and had more than his fair share of health problems.

In the dim distant days when Watton was one of ours, they phoned "Watton here". "Its ****ty here too!" said he.

[Four Types]

We had three very good guys at Aberporth late eighties...we called them 'The Three Tempos'. Same place saw a lady met person arrive...so we called he 'Claudia' (Think about that one!)...the powers that be decreed it was time for the Met Office to be decorated, they let 'Claudia; pick the colours...she did and left shortly afterwards. The guys then had the pleasure of working for the next 10 years in what could only be described as 'menstrual' pink walls:O

[Spikey CFI]

I Remember some of those characters well Dave!
Tweedy dressed as a fairy to do the COs brief one Christmas at Scampton was outstanding and very funny!
Effing George was a joy to work with and real value in the bar (as was Tweedy)
Do any old Meteor boys remember the 'ice queen?'
'Hopeless' the weather girl at Lossie?
Les at, I believe, Laarbruch standing at the brief and saying, "fog" before sitting down again. Station Commander says, "come on Les, you've got to say more than that" Les gets up, "Thick fog" Sits down again!
Another who will remain un-named taking a water pistol into the brief in his inside pocket at Cottesmore. One of the A Sqn pilots had a dog which went to the front and smelled your willie whilst you were briefing. Met man at this point drew his water pistol and shot the dog between the eyes! The room erupted with laughter and the dog never did it again. Happy days!

[Uncle Ginsters]

Nige 'The Wrong' at Brize - you earn a name like that over years of trying, and failing, to forecast Brize's infamous Foggy Fortnight...

[Rosevidney1]

Never knew the name but the local at Aldergrove in the 1970s who answered a question on what the night weather was likely to be with
"Like today, only darker".

[taxydual]

Langley

Dave Duck is still going strong. Still farming. I see him every so often. Not sure if he still glows in the dark. His Blessed Good Lady does.

(And I mean that in the nicest possible way)

[Green Flash]

I had the extreme good fortune to work with F-ing George in the Vale of York years ago. George Stevenson was an absolute LEGEND. He started his career as a Sgt pilot flying Met Recce Halifax's out of Ballykelly. On demob he moved to work for, I think, Post Office Telephones before being seconded to the FCO in East Africa. He was one of the few forecasters who could brief in Swahili or Urdu or probably both, knowing George. No mean shot with a 12 bore, he and Mark Gilson(?) ran the Linton rough shooting club. George was a skilled bee-keeper and a keen golfer. He packed more into a life than you could reasonably expect 3 men to do. At his funeral there were as many outside the church as in. And yes, he had a wide lexicon of industrial strength Anglo-Saxon and could use it to great effect! An utterly utterly brilliant man and we will not see his likes again.Thanks George. :ok:

[taxydual]

Ah, the Gilson. If it walked the land, flew the air, swam the waters, he would eat it.

Sorry, thread drift.

[mgahan]

Those who were on the weekend bus trip to Hatyai from RAAF Butterworth sometime in 1977 will never forget Larry McG and his antics in the hotel lift and later the pool. Back in the office his forecasts were not always as near the mark as he was on the trip.

From the same era was Lance C who arrived without the benefit of a visit to OTS and took the uniform items as a mix and match fashion opportunity which made a serious inroad to the WOD's health.

Further south, in 1974, on the anniversary of the Battle of the Coral Sea, Bernie McE (not the ex USN chap) briefed the historic RAAF Amberley weather for that day and noted, after 25 minutes, "today will be the same". He was spot on.

MJG

[teeteringhead]

One recalls a characteristically funny occasion with "Dave the Met" (can't recall real name) at Shawbury in (??) late 70s early 80s.

One of the CFS Flt Cdrs - known as FLUFF - had a weekend cottage or flat in France (Brittany?) and never lost an opportunity of reminding us all that he had it. So at the end of Friday's Met Brief he would invariably ask at "Any Questions" - "What's the weekend weather going to be like in Brittany?"

Dave puts lovingly prepared, gothic lettered Letraset OHP slide on with the immortal words:

"Haven't a F:mad:ing Clue John!"

...he never asked again....

[langleybaston]

Quote: George Stevenson was an absolute LEGEND.

One of the hairy old assistants at Topcliffe accepted a lift with G and his 6 year-old son to a football match.

He came in next day chastened, shocked even. The son was apparently conversant not only with Swahili and Urdu but also Anglo-Saxon. George lived two doors from me in Thirsk and we could sometimes catch the odd burst of invective on the wafting breezes.

Another Topcliffe character was Lol, an old old assistant, never shaven, never couth. Was marched to Guardroom in small hours by new snowdrop ..... Lol never bothered with his pass "they all know me" and so he was "found asleep by the radiator in the Met Office window and could not account for himself". Fortunately the other copper or his dog recognised this tramp-like figure, so back to "work".

Then there was Wiggy at St Mawgan. If he turned his head sharply, the wig stayed put with reference to spatial coordinates on the shiny underlay by virtue of inertia.

[betty swallox]

I'm sure there was a Nige the Wrong at Cranwell too. Or was it Fenton (in the 90s)

Or how about Johnny Holmes at Finningley??!! He never understood how we puerile student pilots giggled when he came in the class. Not knowing that his name-sake was the infamous porn star. Allegedly...
Told him on the last day of groundschool. He seemed quite pleased! Never told him how I pilfered the met exam, mind....

[Darth49]

Ken the Met - still there early 80s!

[CoffmanStarter]

Leon @ #29 ... I see your Scorchio! and raise you a nice occluded front :E

http://i55.tinypic.com/r1n24w.jpg

[langleybaston]

Officer Harvey doubled as a forecaster .................

Night shifts only.

And only when I was on duty.

Now, where were we?

[Tiger16]

In the not-too-distant past I had the pleasure of being on det with a charming Met lady rejoicing in the nickname of "Back Door B****", for reasons I've never fathomed....

[gearontheglide]

Mr Langley Sir,

I suppose I had better nominate Glide Senior for the infamy side of the list. He only had one really important forecast to get right - my wedding - and, shall we say, 'twas not his finest hour!!!!! Seaweed and pine cones ignored that day!;)

regards

GOTG

[GOLF_BRAVO_ZULU]

CoffmanStarter. I would say that was a warm occlusion.Bert Marsden, Met instructor CATC Hurn '71 ish mentioned that it was the worst sort. He never exlained why, though.

[langleybaston]

Its the Anticyclops you need to watch out for.

My best Met story was told by a pilot as advice to sort out his nav.

The way he told it, if you were lost:

1. Find out where the Low is.

2. Stand with back to wind.

3. Deduce which hemisphere you are in.

Regarding garish ties and waistcoats, the current trophy holder is probably Eric Buckley, currently or recently SMeto Coningsby.

As an afterthought, in my time, we had amongst us a

Mr Flood

Mr Frost

Mr Gale

Mr Waterfall

and Mr Snow.

Not many appropriate surnames for aircrew ...... Mr Thrust I suppose, Mr Gear, Mrs Flap ...........

[Brian 48nav]

Thorney 1967; met instructor on the ground school, Mr Cruikshank IIRC, dished out notes for every leg, worldwide, a transport aircraft was likely to fly. So heavy you could hardly lift them!

No need to swot for the met exam as he allocated marks according to rank; so Plt Off (me ) got 65%,then increments up to Wg Cdr who got 90%!

At Gaydon in '66 the met instructor, whose name escapes me, was asked why he always walked,instead of running, from the tea room back to the classrooms even when it was teeming with rain. 'Ah' he replied,'You obviously haven't had the Doppler effect lecture yet'.

[Green Flash]

Eric Buckley! Used too, maybe still does, race nitro-fuel drag bikes! Respected forecaster, mad as a fish, but a top bloke! :ok:

[Easy Street]

I remember B***e S*****t giving met briefs one late summer on Op TELIC. The shamal was up every few days and the majority of his brief would be about 'dust' and 'sources of dust'. His lisp made this somewhat amusing, particularly as the Little Britain 'high in fat, low in fat, dust', 'anyone, anyone, dust?' was in currency at the time.

[langleybaston]

Had a great reunion this week .........

Dave Taylor ex Marham, Shawbury, St Mawgan, ex MMU Falklands, ex CMetO STC
Brian Wharton ex Wyton, Wildenrath, Detmold, Waddington
Dave Richardson ex Finningley, Shawbury and a lot of Civil
Tom Besford ex Coningsby, Leuchars, Bawtry,
Ian Smith ex Waddington admin
Tony Geordie Armstrong ex MMU just retired, Queen's Commendation
Maureen Phillips, George's widow [George ex STC, HQRAFG and Adjt MMU and Falklands] and wives where applicable.

Of corse these "ex-"s are a sample: most people in a 40 year career averaged a move every three years, never mind detachments, which came thick and fast in formative years, much as RAF but a tad slower.

All at Queen's Head A17 Sleaford, where we have our annual headcount. Many reputations trashed, world's problems sorted.
Great pub, great company.

And thanks to contributors above, a goodly number of memories out there.

[teeteringhead]

And it's Dave Taylor who was the star of my post No 42 above ....

[langleybaston]

Do you know he denied it over a sherbet or two only yesterday!

Can't trust anybody these days!

[ewe.lander]

1970's Middle Wallop - had to be Harold F Boardman! years later was issued with the great man's 'Met for twonks' book at RAF Lyneham.

RAF Northolt 2003 - bloody lovely dark haired lady working for Ian the Met (from RAF Odiham circa 1974), wow she made occluded fronts become warm fronts........:E

[Boxkite Montgolfier]

Brian 48Nav

Inspired!

I've been trying to remember that Cruickshank's name for years.
I clearly must have held the exhaulted rank of F/O given the 67% bestowed!

My story relates around a 65 Percenter in the front row who courageously fell asleep during Cruickshakies appalling, mind numbing, lecture delivery.
Our hero's great fortune was to uncontrollably slumber alongside the the fabulous " Bonzo" Von Haven. US exchange War veteran.

" Wake that man up" screeched the Cruickshank skull to Bonzo.

" You put the ****er to sleep- YOU wake him up!- was Bonzo's memorable response.

An early departure to the pub followed. What a class act was dear Bonzo , now sadly in the clouds, no doubt tweaking the Pantomime Cruickshank.

[langleybaston]

During my attempts to teach student pilots and, later, navigators, I came across a fair few characters, but I suspect that "my generation" of instructors were much nearer the pupil's ages and outlook and education than 10 years earlier. I can honestly say that I enjoyed the experience.
The likes of Chunky Chandler and Cloudy ?? were pretty dire as colleagues, never mind teachers. I took over from Cloudy, who gave me a pile of dusty, mouldering Visual aids and handouts and said I needed just to follow the script and no harm would come by me. Binned the lot.
The other thing was that we were GIT-trained: the short course at RAF Upwood was brilliantly good, and I often think that a similar facility would help many young school-teachers these days.

[WxGirl]

Crikey this is the last place I ever expected to turn up in !! What a nice thing to say. Shawbury was the best place I ever worked at and I miss it still. It's Gráinne btw...but I'll let you off :-)

[CoffmanStarter]

Didn't this chap get remustered as a Met Man following a little whoopsie with a HS146 :suspect:

http://cdn.theguardian.tv/brightcove/poster/2012/5/10/120510PrinceCharlesWeather_6163198.jpg

[ShyTorque]

As an afterthought, in my time, we had amongst us a

Mr Flood

Mr Frost

Mr Gale

Mr Waterfall

and Mr Snow.

A certain Mr. Gale was a Met Officer during one of my postings to RAF Odiham (can't recall exactly which one as I was posted there five times in all). His forecasts always used to be signed "I. C. Gale".

At first I thought it was a spoof, but apparently his forenames were Ian Charles. A more appropriate name for a met officer I couldn't imagine :ok: .

[lsh]

When I was an AATC in the tower at Odiham we had to ring Farnborough to pass on the met reports.
One of the guys had the habit of letting you think you had interrupted him reading, every time, every hour!
"His hand moved knowingly up her.....oh, hello Odiham" etc
Most engaging!

The only initials I can remember from those days were "Delta Whiskey".
But this was not the guy mentioned above.

lsh
:E

[Molemot]

Going through flying training at Linton in 1971, I recall one met type who, for his sins, had been given the task of instructing the sprog pilots in the Mysteries of Meteorology. He was a fount of anecdote about the Atlantic weather ships, and would preface each anecdote by exclaiming "Swing the lamp!!" and suiting action to his words...

[Rossian]

...was a great course run by an absolute bloody genius of a schoolie. All the female studes swooned when he came in to the room and the chaps swooned when we went round to his quarter for supper and met his French wife. As a pair they were almost too perfect. Where are they now one wonders.
Later, much later, when I did the NATO comms course at Latina south of Rome the course was run by a German army major who had done the GIT at Upwood. He spoke beautiful English but "hammed it up" for the benefit of we studes.
"I am learning at the very wonderful RAF GIT course that in order to get the attention of the class it is a good idea to start the day with a joke; therefore we a joke will haf. And the smoke break will be for 5 minutes, or, to be more precise, 300 German seconds".

Back to metmen/women. Sorry.

The Ancient Mariner

[langleybaston]

UPWOOD GIT: first session.

1. instructor talks at students.
2. instructor writes on board
3. instructor writes on OHP
4. instructor projects B&W still photo at same time
5. ditto simultaneous colour still at same time, another screen
6. projects silent B&W film at same time
7. ditto colour[screens everywhere, all active]
8. ditto colour with sound.

Short break, follwed by CCTV film of class, showing us being brain washed into concentrating [unanimously, except the berk asleep or unconscious] on 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8 in strict sequence.

Subject matter apparently irrelevant.

I learned a lot about teaching [never "lecturing!"] from that.

Best course ever.

[Riskman]

This is the most entertaining thread I've read in a long while; hopefully my contribution won't diminish it.

Happy Four at Gioia del Colle, summer 1998. The Boss pitches up at Line Control for the next wave only to find the jets aren't fuelled. He is slightly miffed but understands that thunder and lightning go together and he can hear thunder too. He phones the Metman (exploding bosses are fun to watch when you're blameless) and after being assured that the nearest lightning is 60 miles away yells "You've got a f:mad:g window, open it".

R

[Mal Drop]

The slightly built, bearded Metman at ASI circa '96 who took every opportunity to showcase his pins in the bar during the 'Male or Female Guess the Limb' game (never to be played sober or in above marginal light - actually, just never to be played at all).

Hopeless the Weathergirl at Lyneham (about '98) - always a delight especially at early morning multi-crew briefings before Her Maj's Armed Parachute Display and Orienteering Team went off on one of their spirited romps to finally capture Salisbury Plain.

The Met Instructors at Finningley in the mid 80s - how they managed to get through a day teaching the studes without resorting to extended use of fully automatic weapons will always be a mystery.

Each and every one a credit to the seaweed dangling profession - bless 'em all!

[langleybaston]

I can't remember if I have told the story of how my male member, such as it is, was nearly an RAFP Alsatian's midnight snack?

Nicosia Airfield c. 1962. The days of cloud searchlights for measuring cloud base by Pythagoras. The stratus rolled in and I rolled out to the alidade .... a medieval angle of dangle to use with the known baseline. The alidade was in the middle of the roundabout near Ops/Met/ATC, surrounded by bushes.

The stratus was patchy and I had to wait for a chunk to cross the vertical searchlight beam ......... and I needed a slash. Dark, bushes, slash, flies ........ ah! here's the cloud.

So there I was, mid-stream, squinting at the alidade, when I felt hot breath down below.

ID left in the office of course.

Half an hour later the snowdrop and his dog left the office, one full of Turkish coffee, still laughing, and one full of milk and biscuits [but NO MALE MEMBER].

And I went back outside to read and remember the angle this time ........ and the stratus had gone.

[Farns744]

Morning Briefing Wattisham 1974.
S Met O very proudly announces to assembled Lightning pilots and execs that in the previous 12 months his personnel had got the forecast correct 49% of the time.
Failed to appreciate the laughter from the floor when someone pointed out that if they had taken the opposite view they would have been correct more often.:O

(Probably the same briefing when the ATCO stated that the station ident beacon was flashing steady red,)

[langleybaston]

There is another gathering of Metpersons soon. We hope to include the late dear George/Alan* Phillips's wife and also Tweedie's. Of last years gathering Ian Smith has handed his fircones and seaweed in for the last time ........ we will miss his anecdotes and funny voices. I once turned up for a Do in a navy blue chino suit "going for the crumpled look, are we?"

[George/Alan* P did a very long stint at JHQ, and was a long-time member of the Mobile Met Unit. The story of his two Christian names is a long one which I may tell some day].

[Wander00]

MacCloud at Cranwell (1964 ish) forecasting a gin clear day as through the window behind him we watched fog roll across the airfield

[dagama]

2 Air Navigation School Gaydon 1969 - Charles Ripley who was known as Cu Nim Jim (just rhymed well). His favourite topic was unusual cloud formations, usually found in equatorial regions. As the Varsity had limited range, we we unlikely to encounter them. However, it pleased him that we stayed awake during his lessons.

242 OCU Thorney Is 1970 - Can't remember the name but his Met lesson always after lunch so difficult to stay awake. One question in the final met exam - 'Briefly describe the weather in Sydney in March'. Never made it to Sydney in 33 years of trucking.

6 Flying Training School - Finningley - Mr Gallagher (IIRC) was teaching the students and briefing the day's (or night's) flying. A rugged face to go with the Scottish accent. One day, a stream of 5 Varsity launched (shouldn't have) and all diverted to Leeming due to fog at FY. Frantic phone calls to FY and re-hashed the prog for the next day. Mounted another stream so as not to lose a trg day. Moi, as the instructor in the first ac had to give the Met brief! At least we all got back to FY.

Bill McQueen and the MMU staff on Ascension during Op Corporate - Recycled the Met Reporting Form I had assiduously compiled during the 26-hr flights South, for the crew departing 48 hours later. Something is better than nothing. Met up with Wg Cdr McQueen at Dining-In nights at Brize in the mid 90s

Richard Angwin was at Lyneham before seeking fame on BBC Points West. The crew faced the big windows in the Met office while the forecaster briefed. 'Dry and calm for departure', he said while we saw a thunderstorm open up behind him. He was a bit embarrassed. Ho hum! I believe he is with Al Jezeera now.

[Megaton]

Scouse met man walks into morning brief at Colt in the early nineties. Places slide covered in fluffy stuff on ohp, says "the weather's ****e" and sits down again. Stunned silence from the Execs and giggles from assorted pilots.

[langleybaston]

McQueen and his boys [and a few girls] collected an impressive array of gongs, being sent into just about every operation/ war/ campaign of recent times.

I had lunch with one such, Tony "Geordie" A. a week ago. He has 10 gongs including Air Efficiency etc. and "I just missed the Falklands"!
I imagine few RAF people have as many, perhaps [from memory] Tac Comms Wing as was? One needed to be in a smallish and seemingly indispensible role to be omnipresent.

[nimbev]

dagama
242 OCU Thorney Is 1970 - Can't remember the name but his Met lesson always after lunch so difficult to stay awake. One question in the final met exam - 'Briefly describe the weather in Sydney in March'. Never made it to Sydney in 33 years of trucking.Not sure whether Mr Cruickshank was still around in 1970, but I remember doing the Beverley OCU groundschool in 64 when he taught Climatology. Remember that the Bev had no 'systems' as such to teach the Navs but the OCU still had to take one week under 6 months because that was the length of an OCU. Therefore we Navs filled our time with hours and hours of Climatology resulting in exam questions such as ' What is a typical landing forecast for Alice Springs at 1600 local in November'. Not many Beverleys in Alice Springs. When we got the Herc the climatology was much reduced as the Navs had more important things to learn about eg Nav Aids!

[langleybaston]

I do remember Mr Ripley, he was thinking about retiring as I was early in career, and yes, he was indeed into cloud formations and causes.

Anyone remember Chunky Chandler, Wilf Saunders or Norman Grandy at Manby?

The latter could not abide the office radio ["for listening to the shipping forecasts"] being tuned to music, and always turned it off as he entered.
So a bright spark doctored the radio so that the "off" switch/button/gizmo failed to work. Legend has it that it was capable of battery power, so when he turned it off at the mains socket, the band played on.
A temper tantrum ensued.

[SOSL]

Tall, slim, beautiful, brunette, at Leu. I helped her climb into the mess one night through the ante room window when I delivered her back after dinner at my place. I think we had rabbit pie but it was so long ago I can't really remember.

Rgds SOS

[Warmtoast]

At Gan in 1958 we had no Met men or Women, just an Met Assistant who took the daily observations and measured the upper winds with a balloon and theodolite as seen here. The results were sent to the weather centre at RAF Katunayake (Sri Lanka) who issued the relevant forecasts.

http://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r231/thawes/GAN/MetBaloon.jpg

http://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r231/thawes/GAN/MetBaloon-Tracking.jpg

One of the Met Assistants was a bit of a wag and created a basic and early version of the "Weather Stone" forecasts for airman - which was on paper and pinned up in Gan's primitive 1958 ATC.

http://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r231/thawes/GAN/WeatherForecastingStone_zpse978b0e6.jpg

I don't have a photo of the Gan version, but you can buy your own "Weather Stone" forecaster similar the the one above from the South American River place.

[langleybaston]

Met Techs Course at Shinfield Park c. 1980 [an ex-RAF HQ near Reading]

Mercury Barometer Servicing lesson.

Teacher: "Bloggs, what the bloody hell are you scrabbling around on the floor for?"

Bloggs "all the little ball-bearings have fallen out and are all over the place!"

NB. In these H&S awareness days,
1. mercury baro. not used and
2. if they were, incredible precautions would be taken.

Difficult to legislate against an outbreak of Bloggs, though.

[Fly3]

If I may nominate a dark blue met man it would be Jimmy James at RNAS Culdrose back in the 70's. Always interesting and often hilarious met briefs which led to Helzepheron lunches.

[B Fraser]

Shinfield Park c. 1980

Aaaaaah, Shinditz.

The European Centre for Medium Range Weather Forecasting (ECMWF) was next door. It was known as Early Closing Monday Wednesday Friday.

[L J R]

Joe 'Purple', the Met man at RAAF East (home of CFS, SAN and SATC)….in the early '80s. The surname merely reflected the colour of his jackets and ties - and he had quite the collection.

[Delta_Foxtrot]

Joe 'Purple' was still at East Sale in 1986. Another classic was Lance C at 1FTS. Lance used have his 'jokes within lecture' embedded in his notes - guaranteed to occur at exactly the same point for each course.

[Vie sans frontieres]

As ever it's the French who set the standard.


Video: French weathergirl stuns viewers with nude report - Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/france/10465935/French-weathergirl-stuns-viewers-with-nude-report.html)

[langleybaston]

Now recovering slowly from Met. reunion at Queen's Head Sleaford, 12 attended. Best dining pub in Lincolnshire. One broken ankle. Three unpublishable poems. One presentation champagne, one ditto whisky.
Thanks to David Taylor for organising, and the weather Gods for a sunny day.
Quote of the day: "he was a ****, but I can't remember his name!"

[clicker]

OK with that in mind I'll make a forecast for 12 persons for 3rd Dec with a 99 per cent chance of being right.

Windy and rough, vis poor, foggy becoming better.

[stumblefingers]

Tiny was the RAF MetO during the last 543 Sqn detachment to Lima in 1974 monitoring the French nuclear tests in the Pacific. His high-level (FL490-ish) forecasts 2000nm away from land were usually accurate to within 5kts and 10 degrees. He was a consummate professional, and a delightful man to be with.

[langleybaston]

Would this be Tiny Mentz?

He became OC Mobile Met Unit as I recall.

Not at all Tiny!

[crabrtd]

Have sent you a PM

[Flypro]

Well done Fly3!

I was wondering how long it would take for Jimmy James to get a mention.
One looked forward to his briefings and as I recall he was a leading light of Rent-A-Mob, but that's another story:O

ps Fond memories of the old Fly3 on Ark!!!!!

[Champagne Anyone?]

Well for me it has to be the two Hollies and the lovely Viv at Cranwell....

Always cheered my gloomy day up regardless of the weather!!

[Old Bricks]

Small Welsh met man at Cranwell in late 60s-early 70s. Excellent chap, very dry humour, but sadly cannot remember his name. Whilst teaching Ground School and explaining Buys Ballot's Law, said "I always remember this by the simple way - If you stand in Piccadilly Circus with your back towards the statue of Eros, looking up Regent Street, then Austin Reed is on your left". Ever since then I've had no trouble remembering either the law or the direction.

[moggiee]

I'd like to say a big "THANK YOU" to Trevor "The Wevver" Calvert at Brize in the '80s - the best met man I ever met. I remember battling in to Ops one snowy morning for an early departure (Deci or Dulles or some such) to find Trevor practically skipping around the office with delight. When we said "what have you got to be happy about, you lot didn't forecast this?" he proudly exclaimed "I did and I'm the only person in the country who got it right. I told Bracknell they were wrong and they told me to sod off". He was right more often than not and he was a decent chap to join for a pint in the mess bar .

As for accuracy, I once heard John Kettley say that the most accurate way to forecast is to say "tomorrow will be the same as today - you're more likely to be right than trying to do it properly".

[langleybaston]

Trevor was called TC or TopCat when he taught at the Met Office College, renowned for giving some Saudi students [my father is a prince. I am having problems revising. Would you like a Mercedes?] a hard time.

In my turn, I left a bunch of them in London because they were late reporting to the 2300 depart coach back to the billet near Reading.

Complaints via Embassy to Met Office, to College Principal and .............

.......... LB on carpet, standing, no coffee. Asked to explain.

"I was instructed to impart the British Met Office ethos inter alia. One essential is timeliness"

Case dismissed.

[1066]

Good to see Bill McQueen mentioned. Excellent service to the C130 airbridge at Port Stanley. His forecast of a Z shaped jet stream gave us a 9hr 40mins record for a Herc PSA to ASI, 2/3 Sep82. Average time around 11 hours.
1066

[Dan Winterland]

No idea of their names, but the met men at Palermo were real comedians. For a start they were at a disadvantage being in the only office in the ATC tower with no windows and they would swear blind that there was no rain today, even though you were standing in front of the dripping wet. Their enthusiasm for the notion that all things in Sicily were good filtered through to the approach controllers. One of our rules was that we had to have radar monitoring. But Palermo ATC frequently had other ideas and would reply to a request for radar vectoring with, "Itsa nisa day. Radar, ees switched off".

[Wander00]

Re #86 - France's answer to the burkini furore!

[langleybaston]

I met Peter Jackson last year at a Bawtry Met. reunion: we were together for years at Finningley. I think he drove a sports car "with room in the back for a lawnmower". Name escapes me but I believe it had a fibreglass body. He was one a very few forecasters who attended the RN Lieutenants' Course at Greenwich. I remember because his absence caused me a fair number of extra duties.

The McQueen folklore includes being sent back Home from Ascension [as a S/Ldr RAFR Met] when the Falklands were kicking off by the notorious Captain McQueen RN "we don't need you lot".

But they certainly did.

[langleybaston]

Yes, a Scimitar!

And do I see Roger Boast? ......... I am getting bad with names I fear.

PJ occupied the prestige post as SMetO Cranwell after, I believe, Jim Lawson, or possibly John Tucker.

You may know some of my annual contacts: David Richardson, David Taylor [ex CMetO STC], Brian Wharton, Tony Armstrong, Tom Besford et al.

One day I well tell PJ's tale of an uproarious naughty night duty at Heathrow.

[langleybaston]

Beg to report another reunion at Queen's Head Sleaford.

Dave Richardson unable to attend. Otherwise Dave Taylor ex-CMetO STC, ex-Shawbury, ex-Detmold, ex-Marham was in the chair, surrounded by Barbara Tweed, Maureen Phillips, Brian Wharton , ex- everywhere including RAFG, Tony Armstrong ex-MMU and Coltishall, and a supporting cast of several .
The pub took it all in good part, as ever.

Tony Armstrong's medals have been mounted at last "but I am not sure where the Air Efficiency medal has got to". As there are ten others, who cares?

Great company, and reminders of wonderful times serving the RAF, who were sometimes grateful and always sceptical.
"When I am right, no-one remembers, when I am wrong, no-one forgets".

[NickB]

Funny the things you remember, but I'm sure Tony Graeme was on the EGVN roster as 'AFG' and Frank Callanan as 'CFC'... that is correct isn't it?

[langleybaston]

I'm sorry but I don't know. Met folk were as peripatetic as service people, averaging about a mosting every three years with detachments in between.

"Where my caravan has rested" is a long long list!

[stumblefingers]

I remember Jan's (and she was lovely) forecast well. I was writing the 240 OCU's entry to the station mag at the time, and did a spoof drama story about it. I think she forgave me.....

In a previous life on 543 Sqn at Wyton, Ken Cook the station commander asked our Polish met man at morning briefing if there might be any snow that day. "Group Captain, I can assure you that there will be no snow at Wyton today." was the response. We walked out of stn ops into a veritable blizzard!

[3caster]

John Tucker very good cool and competent ..... it was my pleasure to be his boss, inspecting Cranwell was always a pleasure but I found little to complain about, waste of a day really!

I think the Valley man with stutter was KKKKKenny KKKKKemp? I had little to do with the western half of this sceptered isle until Cardiff/Bristol/Plymouth in the late 80s.

A succession of SMetOs at Linton failed to notice/ report that their anemo mast was 2 metres short, thus causing significant under-reading of wind speed. Ruddock, Hindley to name two. Outrage when I insisted we measured it! "Its been good enough all these years ........!" I borrowed a Chinook to airlift [slung] a spare mast from Cumbria, and the Linton dwarf went for scrap.

Oh! And I should also praise Peter jackson, Finningley, later SMetO Cranwell, also I think Wittering, with his passion for interesting cars driven too fast. Far too fast.
John Tucker more than once did a massed briefing to student pilots at Cranwell on dense foggy mornings. They were all expecting to remain grounded at least until the infamous 10Z, when John woke them up by saying "I know of a place not half a mile from here, where the sun is shining and visibility is unlimited". After a pause to allow brains to stir, he pointed upwards.
On other occasions he would set them on calculating how many million tonnes a CB cloud weighs. - 3caster

[Basil]

Jan 1974; just left RAF and arrived in Jersey for some BEA Viscount training.
Little 'one ring' Bas knocked on Met office door and entered. Opened mouth to speak to be met with:
"I AM CARRYING OUT A BRIEFING!"
Bas: "Oh, sorry, I thought you were just having a chat."
Exit Bas to reddening glow from metman's face. :p

[langleybaston]

"When briefing a senior officer [understood to be Sqn Ldr or above] put down pipe or cigarette".

Wg Cdrs and above were usually sufficient to bring Cloudy to his feet, albeit in a hunched, nicotine stained, and dishevelled state.

My prize briefings:

Douglas Bader
Sir Malcolm Campbell
Mickey Martin

and ACM Stacey's chopper pilot, who I told to "sod off, sunshine, you can't queue jump just because you forgot to book on the mayfly".
C Met O had me on the mat for that but he had trouble keeping a straight face. There is quite a lot of background to that episode.

[reds & greens]

I think any Met Official who can sucessfully project the weather 24hrs in advance is infamous, - as there certainly aint many of them.

[dagama]

Cu-nimb Charlie at 242 OCU Dishforth in 1957. His nickname was due to a prominent lump on the top of his bald head. He was an excellent climatology lecturer.

Would that be the same Charles Ripley who was known as Cunim Jim at a Nav School (Gaydon I think) in 1968-1970. I showed him a photograph of unusual cloud formation in Kenya and he proceeded to give me both barrels on the finer points of climate in Kenya. His teaching did come in useful when I became a truckie.

[Timelord]

Early morning met at Finningley for the low level Dominie push. Weather terrible apparently although BBC seemed to think it would be OK-Confirmed by the 0700 actuals so we gave the aircraft to our medium level friends and retired to the feeder.
0900- Back at the office desk and call from S Met O; " was it you that decided to scrub the LL wave?- is there any chance of resurrecting it?" "Not really, why."
" She gave you yesterday's actuals"

[ricardian]

Seen on Facebook - Several people with meteorological knowledge have advised that the atmospheric phenomena captured here are: a circumzenithal arc, a supralateral arc, an upper tangent arc (relatively rare), a 46 degree halo (pretty rare), a Parry arc, Parry supralateral arcs, a 22 degree halo, twin sun dogs (parhelia), partial parhelic circle, and an upper sun pillar. I also understand it is rare to see all of these during a single event. I hope you enjoy the picture! Taken in Eastern Manitoba, Canada..

https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t31.0-8/26170619_531072680596812_3332230869058407085_o.jpg?oh=9b4671 9e17451b24c667662efbb5b368&oe=5ABCBE5A

[langleybaston]

Early morning met at Finningley for the low level Dominie push. Weather terrible apparently although BBC seemed to think it would be OK-Confirmed by the 0700 actuals so we gave the aircraft to our medium level friends and retired to the feeder.
0900- Back at the office desk and call from S Met O; " was it you that decided to scrub the LL wave?- is there any chance of resurrecting it?" "Not really, why."
" She gave you yesterday's actuals"

Was that SMetO the excellent "Mac" Cameron? My super boss for five years, six daughters I think, and then a boy, much to everyone's relief. For no very good reason he had almost as many lawnmowers as offspring.
[Come to think of it, so have I, but the ratio is 4:3]

[langleybaston]

Ricardian ............ oh! oh! ..........Wow!

Very very rarely do the weather gods allow such a coming together, and even more rare to have a decent camera handy. And a foreground to match.

Many thanks.

[no Green Flash, mind you .................]

[FAR CU]

Early one morning, just as the sun was rising, into the met office at Cambridge Airport, (the one at Hobart , Tasmania) , there stomped the CFI of the newly formed Aero Club of Southern Tasmania, Lloyd Jones, till not long before , an instructor at No9 EFTS Western Junction, in the State's north.

Lloyd and the met man , Sam, disliked each other's GUTZ , to put it mildly. Lloyd, with pipe clenched between his teeth, stood by Sam's desk, feeling in his pocket for his matches. He lit his briar, then casually tossed the match into the nearby metal waste paper basket, igniting the scrunched up paper therein. A furious Sam leapt up from his chair, went to stamp the fire out, but his shoe jammed in the now blazing basket, and was about to set his strides on fire. Swearing loudly, Sam danced around the room trying desperately to shake the basket free.

What did the very cool Lloyd do? He lent over Sam's consol and pressed the big red knob, setting off loud sirens and alerting the airport fire crew. A fire extinguisher was mounted on the wall of the met office, so Lloyd took hold of it and used it for its designed purpose.

Needless to say, from that day on, any duff weather forecast by Sam, Lloyd ignored. And went flying anyway.

[langleybaston]

It seems Met Men attract waste paper troubles.
We had a fastidious Polish gent at FY who, in nis quest for neatness, trod the paper in the WPB right into the metal bin when he arrived to take over.

So PJ empied the bin, filled it with cold water, floated a raft of paper on it, and waited for KS to arrive.
As did several others ...............

"I suppose you think that bloody funny?!"

Yes.

[Timelord]

Was that SMetO the excellent "Mac" Cameron? My super boss for five years, six daughters I think, and then a boy, much to everyone's relief. For no very good reason he had almost as many lawnmowers as offspring.
[Come to think of it, so have I, but the ratio is 4:3]

The met man with six daughters was indeed well known when I was there as a student (72-73) but the story is from when I was there as an instructor after his time I think.

[langleybaston]

Timelord: thank you, that fits perfectly because in Mac's time there were no young ladies in the office. I think he was succeeded by a Yorkshireman, Roy Walters?

More's the pity about the girls, of course.

[Eric T Cartman]

Re GBZ's post #50 & Bert Marsden @ CATC, Hurn.
We knew him as "Turbulent Eddy". I recall his frequent disparaging remarks about radio/tv reports mentioning 'black ice'. "There ain't no such animal !" :-)

[Vasco Sodcat]

Liz was in STS at Lyneham, forecasting at the Main Brief for an ABEX onto Otterburn, incorporating the usual parallel streams of Para/Para Wedge aircraft and Stores aircraft, probably about 21 in total. She warned the Brigadier (ABF Cdr) that before sunset the wind would be too strong for Para, and soon after dusk frontal ****e would come through, = chose your P Hour very carefully. The streams briefed and mounted, and sure enough on the run-in the wind was reported by the DZSO as miraculously reducing to within limits. As the last Para ac finished its second pass over the DZ (to get rid of those too slow to get out on the first pass) a solid wall of brown ****e rolled over the DZ, but all ac were by then drop complete. A forecaster's finest hour!

Can't believe no-one's mentioned Mogadon from Shawbury, late 70s / early 80's?

[Lynxmech]

Or "Trig". Netheravon 1979/1980!!

[langleybaston]

Vasco Sodcat.

Thank you, nice for one of us to be remembered thus. I can assure you that forecasting for drops was just about the most frightening, difficult, demanding and rewarding of the things we were asked to do.

In retrospect I cannot believe that I was allowed, unsupervised, to forecast and mass brief for a major drop from RAF Nicosia. Fresh from training, 24 years old, all of 6 months at Gatwick [of all places] sitting by Nelly, and WHOOF! here's a major exercise. In fairness, the pseudo-science of drop forecasts had been well studied and documented, with lots of cases, during the war, and we had full access to this received wisdom.

I didn't have the intelligence to be frightened until 10 years later.

No bones broken, no gear destroyed, no dropped loads rubbished; all was sweetness and light.

Lucky or what?

[jindabyne]

Had the QFI's at Valley had access to the Met Office's charts each day, I believe that the need for Met Officers would have been negated.

As it was, there were insufficient Met Officers to provide a daily morning brief at No 3 Sqn on the far side of the airfield. So we used to collect the charts from Met en route to the far side at 0700, and thence the duty Auth would give the Met brief. Never a problem. :D

[langleybaston]

The requirement for Met Offices at RAF stations was driven by the Air Staff. I know for a fact that soundings were taken from Staishs from time to time, and the consensus was that Met was needed.
Of course this suited the Met Office because the observations were an important component of the national network.
The cost of offices on stations was substantially borne by the RAF until the Met Office gained Agency status c. 1980, after which we charged an arm and a leg.

The bottom line was that if a Staish had a Met office and took its advice and came a cropper, the blame could be spread a little more thinly.

Should any staish wish to dispense with the services of an individual, that individual was always moved.

When the drawdown in RAFG was beginnining I made informal soundings with SASO ...... did he want Met to stay on each base until the last aircraft flew out? He did.

[jindabyne]

Quelle surprise.

[Mercury Rising]

I am very sad to report that Wg Cdr Bill McQueen who has been mentioned in this thread a couple of times, died at the weekend. RIP

[BLATCH]

How about the metman who forecast that "visibility will be widespread!"

[langleybaston]

I am very sad to report that Wg Cdr Bill McQueen who has been mentioned in this thread a couple of times, died at the weekend. RIP

Bill led the Mobile Met Unit through its most eventful and difficult days. As the Falklands war was kicking off Bill arrived at Ascension by air as a Sqn Ldr and was famously accosted by Captain McQueen RN who was sending "surplus" arrivals packing ."Only room for one McQueen here. The Navy can do the Met".
Fortunately for the RAF and Black Buck, reason prevailed, and we did the business as well as state of the art could provide. Bill was awarded an MBE.

Afterwards he ran the much expanded MMU [with the aid of the adjt, Pete Davies] during several crises including the Balkans, and Gulf War One.
Wg Cdr McQueen, by virtue of commanding the MMU and being here there and everywhere near the sharp end probably had more gongs than almost any regular officer.

This is a very incomplete obit because our careers were parallel and I am sure that others can fill in the gaps.

[esa-aardvark]

My Father told me the only Metman to trust was the one who arrived in a Spitfire,
and said 'quick, get inside it's going to pour in 5 minutes"

[langleybaston]

Because this thread is not the most appropriate forum for a RIP to Wg Cdr McQueen I have started a new one, thus entitled.

[EarlyMet]

Its the Anticyclops you need to watch out for.

My best Met story was told by a pilot as advice to sort out his nav.

The way he told it, if you were lost:

1. Find out where the Low is.

2. Stand with back to wind.

3. Deduce which hemisphere you are in.

Regarding garish ties and waistcoats, the current trophy holder is probably Eric Buckley, currently or recently SMeto Coningsby.

As an afterthought, in my time, we had amongst us a

Mr Flood

Mr Frost

Mr Gale

Mr Waterfall

and Mr Snow.

Not many appropriate surnames for aircrew ...... Mr Thrust I suppose, Mr Gear, Mrs Flap ...........


Yes, I know/worked with some of those, and since then we had Mr Rainbow too.
Did you know that Mr Gale's initials were I.C. ?

I worked with Eric Buckley when he was SMetO Coningsby, now retired along with the rest of us older school "Met Guessers".

The Met folk are mostly female graduates or sensitive males now, having entered a period of positive discrimination to change the demographic since the Blair Government days.

The Meteorology aspects are now gone, with just the computer observing and number analysis remaining.

I'm afraid, like with the military, the days of traditional duty are now gone, replaced with blandness and fast staff turnovers, targets and performance indicators, insular characters and uninterested clones.

I was lucky to see the things I have when I saw them, luckier still to be out of it now.

Watch your six!

[pr00ne]

EarlyMet,

... and you watch your bitterness!

[Radley]

Yes, I know/worked with some of those, and since then we had Mr Rainbow too.
Did you know that Mr Gale's initials were I.C. ?

I worked with Eric Buckley when he was SMetO Coningsby, now retired along with the rest of us older school "Met Guessers".

The Met folk are mostly female graduates or sensitive males now, having entered a period of positive discrimination to change the demographic since the Blair Government days.

The Meteorology aspects are now gone, with just the computer observing and number analysis remaining.

I'm afraid, like with the military, the days of traditional duty are now gone, replaced with blandness and fast staff turnovers, targets and performance indicators, insular characters and uninterested clones.

I was lucky to see the things I have when I saw them, luckier still to be out of it now.

Watch your six!

Bit of a frosty post there EarlyMet.

[Ant T]

...... Effing George ....... Topcliffe, a legend in his own lunch time, shocked even his colleagues with his expletives. One per sentence minimum. ......

Dan Suri was one of the forecasters who did a season (or two?) at the British Antarctic Survey base at Rothera. His morning briefings to the Air Unit were similar, for being filled with expletives.

In the Falklands, the weather forecast read out on the local radio always includes the forecaster’s name. Jim Elliott was a regular on the met team at Mount Pleasant during the 80s and 90s, and when you heard his name along with the forecast, you could be pretty sure that was what you were going to get. Guess it helped that he had spent a lot of time in the Falklands right back to the 1960s, and was married to a Falkland Islander, so had a good knowledge of local effects.

[ShyTorque]

Yes, I know/worked with some of those, and since then we had Mr Rainbow too.
Did you know that Mr Gale's initials were I.C. ?


I did; I mentioned it in this thread at post #63, almost eight years ago! ;)

[NickB]

Or "Trig". Netheravon 1979/1980!!

Just seen this (almost 3 years late, but better late than never (unless it's a weather forecast of course!!))

So, to put the record straight... the 'Trig' mentioned most definitely wasn't a Metman and his nickname was actually 'Trick' - short for Tricker, his surname. He was actually managing the Flight Planning Dept at Netheravon, although I believe he kept the 'Gilbey's Gin' distillery in business for many, many years... most days he was sozzled, particularly on Fridays when he was completely (and I'm not joking here) steaming by early afternoon and then drove home to Upavon!
His 60s/70s dress attire and underarm tide marks on his shirts are a sight that will stay with me forever...

[KPax]

James Rainbow is currently one of the Metmen at Shawbury (very good), best Metmen I worked with was at the RCC at Pitreavie Castle, give them a call and say 'we have an incident of top of some mountain in the Cairngorms what's the weather like', give them their due, they gave their best effort.

[langleybaston]

The mention of Jim Elliott reminds me of his time at HQ 1 Group Bawtry. He turned up from time to time, usually during the UK winter, worked six months, then went back to the Falklands for six months, then came back to Bawtry ........
He complained that he had not seen a rose in bloom for ages.

A fair few Met.men married Islanders ........ Sam Glassey for example, who, if memory serves, finished his career as P Met O Honington.

After the war, I was offered a one-year tour as i/c, accompanied and accommodated. Very unusually, my wife turned it down. It was the only posting that she really did not fancy. Good decision in retrospect.

[SirToppamHat]

I have spent a fair bit of time up at Saxa Vord over the past 3 years, installing the new radar system there. Those of you with experience of the place will have a feel for the conditions there. At the risk of thread drift, I have to say that without the MMU reservists on site I don't think it would have happened. The basic safety stuff (actual wind speeds above 50kts = no outdoor work and 70+ = get off the site) was very well handled without difficulty it seemed, and the the 2 main forecasters (who shall be nameless as they're still in uniform) made all the difference for the actual construction workers throughout (day and night!). Two major lifts carried out on the same day requiring wind speeds of less than 9 kts were achieved in separate windows each of about 30 mins, forecast a couple of hours ahead. Even the local drivers of the huge crane didn't believe it until it happened. The 60-foot radome was lifted whole in the middle of the evening - within 12 hours the wind speed had risen to 130kts!

Oh and I do not doubt the importance or contribution of other, regular, MetOs away from the site either. As a special bonus, there will be an automated weather station up there shortly coming on line - standby for some strong winds!

I just wanted some credit where it was due! I'll get my coat.

[NickB]

The mention of Jim Elliott reminds me of his time at HQ 1 Group Bawtry. He turned up from time to time, usually during the UK winter, worked six months, then went back to the Falklands for six months, then came back to Bawtry ........
He complained that he had not seen a rose in bloom for ages.

A fair few Met.men married Islanders ........ Sam Glassey for example, who, if memory serves, finished his career as P Met O Honington.

After the war, I was offered a one-year tour as i/c, accompanied and accommodated. Very unusually, my wife turned it down. It was the only posting that she really did not fancy. Good decision in retrospect.

Looking back on my career through more mature eyes, I wish I had taken the opportunity for a tour of the FI - I did give it consideration once, but in the end the thought of 6 months in the Summer (first tourists Metmen (people) to the FI will only usually get a UK Summer tour) spent in the Falklands to come home to yet another Winter was enough to decide against it. The allure of a UK social life when in my 20s was more appealing! Then I managed to wangle a tour to RAFG and that was that!
Who was it that said youth is wasted on the young?!

[langleybaston]

I have spent a fair bit of time up at Saxa Vord over the past 3 years, installing the new radar system there. Those of you with experience of the place will have a feel for the conditions there. At the risk of thread drift, I have to say that without the MMU reservists on site I don't think it would have happened. The basic safety stuff (actual wind speeds above 50kts = no outdoor work and 70+ = get off the site) was very well handled without difficulty it seemed, and the the 2 main forecasters (who shall be nameless as they're still in uniform) made all the difference for the actual construction workers throughout (day and night!). Two major lifts carried out on the same day requiring wind speeds of less than 9 kts were achieved in separate windows each of about 30 mins, forecast a couple of hours ahead. Even the local drivers of the huge crane didn't believe it until it happened. The 60-foot radome was lifted whole in the middle of the evening - within 12 hours the wind speed had risen to 130kts!

Oh and I do not doubt the importance or contribution of other, regular, MetOs away from the site either. As a special bonus, there will be an automated weather station up there shortly coming on line - standby for some strong winds!

I just wanted some credit where it was due! I'll get my coat.

Thank you on their behalf.
A nice change from our motto:

WHEN I'M RIGHT NO ONE REMEMBERS, WHEN I'M WRONG NO ONE FORGETS!

[ex-fast-jets]

I cannot offer the names of the individuals..............

My first - when I was training at Valley in 1970, we had a young (well, old to us youth - but probably still in his 20's) Met Man who looked outrageous to our young military minds. He had long hair, tied in a pony tail...........

He usually gave us our morning Met brief and finished with "that is what I am required by Bracknell to tell you - but what is really going to happen is........."

He had local knowledge which Bracknell's computer did not have, and he was usually right!!

My second offering is a RN Met Man on (in??) HERMES in 82.........

The weather down south was not great, and one morning he put a black and white transparency onto the OHP (remember those??) of a fairly deep depression in our area....

"This" he said in serious MetMan tones "is known in meteorological circles as a Zebra's arsehole........"

[mgahan]

EFJ's post reminds me of an old and bold SmetO from my early days as a separator of aircraft in the RAAF.
Bernie (one of two MetOs with that name at Amberley at the time) appeared at the morning mass brief a few minutes late one very foggy morning in early May 1973. The Met brief followed immediately after the 0800 (2200 GMT, as it was in those days) time hack by the junior ATC so there had been an embarrassing silence for several minutes, punctuated at regular intervals by glaring looks from "Spud" (the Base Commander), Lovable Lyle (my CO) and Morphia (my SATCO). With no apologies, he launched into his brief with OHPs showing the disposition of naval forces in the Coral Sea and raid paths by allied aircraft on the Japanese fleet 31 years earlier. Following the history lesson he proceeded to show the synoptic and other charts considered of "value" to the air crew and traffickers assembled for what all hoped would be a very late start to flying due to the fog. At the end of the brief he called for questions. First up was Spud, "Thanks for the history lesson Bernie but the reason we all came here this morning was to hear a forecast and not a history lesson."

"But the forecast in in the history, as always," Bernie replied." On 5 May 1942 we had exactly the same conditions overnight and early morning here at Amberley as we have today so the fog will be gone by 1015 so cancel the first wave and you can taxi and launch the second wave as planned."

The second wave was due to taxi for a 1000 departure and at 0955 the fog was as thick as it has been all morning. Nothing moved on the flight line and in the tower we brewed a second coffee and commenced planning for early stand downs and beers. 1005 the TWR SPR called down to MET and asked for a revised forecast. "Stand by" , he was told by a non repentant SMetO. , "All will be revealed in a few minutes."

True to the history lesson and forecast by 1014 or so we were in brilliant early winter sunshine which remained all day.

I do have another MetO story from the 1970's which involves HHH, a bus trip to HatYai, a hotel lift and a swimming pool but if you are reading this Larry you can relax: my lips remain sealed.

A story which can be reported with only a small amount of embarrassment to the MetO involved also comes from those halcyon days in the 1970's. . Spear (not his real name) was put on the RAAF Specialist Reserve and posted for duties at Butterworth with a plan to send him back to Australia for OTS some four months later. On the way he was issued with a large number of uniform items. The RAAF in those days had transitioned from 3As 2B, 1As, battle jackets, pansy drabs and so on including drab shorts and shirts for warmer climes to an "all seasons uniform" which could be mixed and matched to suit the climate or order of dress for parades and formal occasions. On his first morning in uniform Spear chose the short sleeved blue shirt, drab shorts, the dark blue belt, and the nice pale blue tie to impress the boss on day 1.. He crossed Highway 1 from the Officers' Mess to the Main Gate and inquired of the very military gent standing at the gate checking dress of arrivals, "Can you please show me where the Control Tower is, as I've been told to report to the Senior Meteorologist there. "

"Sir," the Base WOD addressed him formally, "How much have you been paid to preform this circus act."

Thankfully the day shift tower team were passing by and rescued him, having met him (excuse the pun) the previous evening over many beers.

Spear's ability to forecast tropical Met was somewhat questionable but he went on to gain much experience in Antarctic Met and delivered a very learned paper in a 45 minute riveting presentation on "The Dynamics of Rain Drop Formation and Shape" in 1987 at a meeting I attended in my (then) role as liaison between he Bureau and the ADF. He was also a very accomplished French Horn player.

MJG

[langleybaston]

Great!

In 41 years, and literally dozens of postings and nigh on a thousand colleagues, I never knew, or knew of, a single one who could play a musical instrument.
[Other than his/ her own trumpet.]

[langleybaston]

........................................

[Tengah Type]

In the middle 60's the Weather Man on Anglia Television was a gentleman by the name of Michael Hunt. He was a regular guest at the Officer's Mess bar at RAF Marham at the weekends.
He was a flamboyant version of Captain Mainwaring in that he was short in stature, but with a better moustache. He also wore a colourful bow tie. His party piece was to introduce himself
as " Mike'unt" which said rapidly caused much mirth amongst the male attendees, but some consternation with the ladies.

[langleybaston]

Rumour was that::
He said " I am a country member" and people said they remembered..
The Met assistants were Betty Swallocks and Mary Hingepiece.

[Ant T]

Great!

In 41 years, and literally dozens of postings and nigh on a thousand colleagues, I never knew, or knew of, a single one who could play a musical instrument.
[Other than his/ her own trumpet.]

I found the met people at Rothera (British Antarctic Survey base) to be a very musical bunch. In particular - Will Lang, played bass in the band, (very well...), and that was not his main instrument. He also sang, and played keyboards, drums, guitar, better than most of us in the rest of the band, and I think his main instrument at home was brass (tuba?). Also, George Fell, who drummed in the band for a while and was also a very good guitarist, who I think had taught himself without being able to really see the guitar, while flat on his back after breaking his back in a kayak accident. He was a met observer at Rothera, who I think went on to be a forecaster, before moving on to being an outdoor activities instructor. And Adam Thornhill, also a very good drummer, also an observer who went on to become a forecaster - I met up with him again a few years later when he was posted to Mount Pleasant.
So maybe your colleagues weren’t quite as tone deaf as you thought . . .

[langleybaston]

Thank you: obviously the musical met folk went a long way away from Home. "Over the Hills and Far Away!"

There was one famous, and indeed eminent, very senior musical gentleman of the old school: 3 piece suit, even on one of his occasional shifts. Occasional because he was indeed very senior and did a few shifts, like any good boss, to stay current and keep an eye on things.

I shall call him Alf. Professionally, he was a rare beast, having worked his way up and up by sheer ability to become a Chief Experimental Officer. He was responsible for many practical and empirical solutions to problems before numerical computers, and was both revered for his dedication and feared for his unbending discipline.

None of which has anything to do with music. "What did he play?" I hear you wonder.

His nose!

He hummed incessantly. Being a devout Christian and Lay Preacher, all his tunes were hymns. He carried a full repertoire: Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, Pentecost followed in due season, interspersed with Harvest, the occasional wedding, and the occasional funeral. Remembrance was not forgotten.

It was said that a night shift with Alf was never to be forgotten. Unfortunately.

RIP sir, a legendary giant among men who were the mainstay in the war, and the leaders thereafter.