What to send a mate in Afghanistan

[Prophead]

Hi

I have a mate out there with the marines at the moment and a few of us have been sending him stuff to help keep his spirits up.

I'd like to send him something different. (Last month he got the latest FHM from 4 of us). I was thinking there may be something that you wouldnt usually think of but would be a great item to receive whilst out there.

Any real ideas gratefully received and i look forward to many witty replies;)

[randomname]

A nice frock wouldn't go amiss

[Random Bloke]

When we were in Lash a colleague of mine recieved a parcel from his mates in the UK and excitedly ripped it open to find.........a small bag of sand! :bored:

[Doors Off]

Old news paper clippings, especially of useless lifestyle sections. Always brings a smile to the sender and the receiver.

If you have lots of spare time on your hands, buy the latest adult mag and ensure you take a permanent marker and edit out all the rude words and put appropriate clothing on the ladies:E

Or potentially a bottle of ladies shampoo with the contents emptied and refilled with something more appropriate made from russian potatoes. :}

Don't underestimate the effect that a hand written letter has, much more thoughtful and meaning than an email.

Door Off.

[taxydual]

Falklands, Christmas 1982.

My Granny (bless her) sent me a most useful gift.

A £20 Woolworth's voucher!

Ah well, it was the though that counted......................

[im from uranus]

During Gulf War 1 I was featured (as were all local servicemen) in my local paper. The result was brilliant, letters and parcels came flooding in, some good, some not so. The one I will never forget was from a neighbour (by 5 no's) who simply wrote about what was going on in her life, and life in general back home and thanking me for what I was doing. I had not spoken to her for many years since leaving home but it was the highlight of my tour.

Try and find this guys home local rag and see if they'll do a 'special'?

If not, buy him a hairdryer and some curling tongs!!! :}

[NutLoose]

I sent a parcel to some US marines and it cost me a fortune but was worth it, at least sending to a BFPO you wont have that problem.... send him some Condoms with one missing and the empty foil in it and tell him you used it ;)

Funny thing was the US listing of things suitable and allowed to be sent states NO PORK PRODUCTS........ the UK one on the list one of the first items recommended to send is PORK SCRATCHINGS :D

There is a person on Ebay that does packages of useful stuff to send, but being mates and cheapskates can you not look for a pizza delivery service that says they will deliver anywhere, I remember someone ordered some for some peeps in the Falklands and good to the word the company involved Delivered! Via the Tristar airbridge, though they said it was a one off.....

But if you want to raise a laugh then

Instant Gay Accent, Mint Breath Spray, Hilarious! on eBay, also, Totally Bizarre, Weird Stuff, Collectables (end time 10-Oct-08 23:03:56 BST) (http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Instant-Gay-Accent-Mint-Breath-Spray-Hilarious_W0QQitemZ160288616517QQihZ006QQcategoryZ1469QQtcZp hotoQQcmdZViewItemQQ_trksidZp1742.m153.l1262)

Or this

Handz Off Anti-Masturbatory Cream / Lotion (Blue Q) on eBay, also, Lotions-Body, Bath Body, Health Beauty (end time 05-Nov-08 04:01:59 GMT) (http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Handz-Off-Anti-Masturbatory-Cream-Lotion-Blue-Q_W0QQitemZ150081414193QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item150081414193&_trksid=p3286.m63.l1177)

They used to do the chewing gum on ebay too so you need to look for it :)

http://www.foureyesjokeshop.com/ProductImages/Handz_off_GUM.jpg

US link, but you should find it in the UK, was available on ebay a bit ago along with some orgasm versions.........

Handz Off Anti-Masturbatory GUM (http://www.foureyesjokeshop.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=430)

Oh and it does work :ok::p;)

[Early Stack]

How long has your mate been in theatre? Two months into my last tour my mum sent me out new underwear and socks! Sounds all very practical and boring, but it was a real boost.

[NutLoose]

Yup, two months in I bet your other pair were getting rather crusty :oh::}

[Prophead]

Some good replies so far. he'll definately be getting some anti-masturbating gum.

He has been there about 2 months, but im not sure about the pants and socks thing. Ill leave that to his mother.

[airborne_artist]

pants and socks thing. Ill leave that to his mother

Not sure even a Para would want his Mum's pants.....:ok:

[NutLoose]

Or perhaps a nice calender for him to tick off the days till he comes home, one like this LOL..:}

Raging Stallions Studios Grunts 2009 Calendar on eBay, also Current Year, Next Year, Calendars, Paper, Collectibles (end time 12-Oct-08 17:16:45 BST) (http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Raging-Stallions-Studios-Grunts-2009-Calendar_W0QQitemZ350097941858QQihZ022QQcategoryZ156486QQtcZ photoQQcmdZViewItemQQ_trksidZp1742.m153.l1262)


I must have a twisted sense of Humour :8

[Mark Nine]

Some card and glue to make his own sandpaper or a nice reminder of home like a Big Mac meal.

[Pontius Navigator]

CrabAir Christmas tree from Bradford Exchange?

[Geezers of Nazareth]

Get a piece of sandpaper and draw on it an imaginary barrack area, add a small cross indicating 'You are here', and then draw an escape tunnel.

[mr fish]

switch on your dvd recorder and copy the F1 races for him.
send them out and after 3 laps he'll be well up for shooting someone.
I KNOW I AM!!!:(

[VinRouge]

One of the lads had a soil treatment kit sent out to him, together with a small bag of English lawn seed. He used it to create his own 2 foot by one foot segment of grass which he used to step out onto in the morning, in a small tray, using desert soil.

We thought he was cracking up, but thinking back, was actually quite good.

The more facile part of me wants to suggest a 120 Gb USB hard disk with the finest "flight safety material" you can find...:E

I used to take out a jar of horseradish sauce. we could only get small sachets that tasted foul in Basra. Couple of bags of Haribo also good...

Cutout of local newspaper singles and desperate... hours of fun emailing/writing to girls and constructing inthheatre leaderboard with points scored for most troll-like, number of kids, age etc...

[Benjybh]

How about an officially endorsed RAF Spitfire Christmas Tree-come-carriage clock-internet-fridge-novelty bobble?

[SirPercyWare-Armitag]

Remote control toys are always a winner
Fun Gifts - Gadgets, Cool Toys, Gift Idea Finder, Gadget Stuff - Cool Shop (http://www.paramountzone.com/)

[Logistics Loader]

PVR Application !!

[L J R]

PVR Approval

[norvenmunky]

My son is a Royal Marine and these are the contents of a box I sent last week:

Firstly I bought a plastic box (approx shoe box size) with a handle and snap locks on the side for a quid, hopefully he will be able to put this to good use after he's emptied it.

Anti-bacterial hand gel, chewing gum, disposable razors, dental flossers, wet-wipes, lip balm, hanging insect repellent, 1000 mile socks, batteries. Bags of sweets (plenty of choice with halloween coming up) Galaxy chocolate drinks, tic-tacs, strawberry flavoured space dust. . . and a sleeping mask with sparkly sequins around the edge that says F*** O** on the front!!

Urban Outfitters - F**k Off Eye Mask (http://www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk/invt/5559410571050)

Cheers:ok:

[antisthenes]

The 4th US Mech division!

[Double Zero]

I've just sent a few packages out; I'm told tins of sausages & beans are particularly well received.

Also sent wet wipes, colmans mustard, chilli sauce, various reading matter inc. 'Private Eye', key fob torches, pens & writing pads, cartoons, insect repellent etc* - ( * the only non-pressurised insect repellent I could find was Tesco's kid's stuff - I did put in a note explaining ! ).

As you probably know, the weight limit is 2 kilos, and one must have a name to send it to - my chum has been doing this for a while so has a name to address to; it took 3 large jiffy bags to send anything significant.

Before I get jumped on for overloading the airlift incapacity, I'd say this sort of thing seemingly does a lot of good for morale,( have heard very positive feedback ) and even our lot can tell parcels from ammo' !

[scientia in alto]

Bombay mix
Small annoying puzzles
Top trumps
Humbugs
Savory treats, cheese twists etc. as many people send sweets
Patriotic flags
Shower gels and posh soaps (aerosol cans are now removed by the BFPO)

Also send what you like. I was recently out in theatre and we were passing out many parcels to the troops. All I know is that the boys in the FOBs were very grateful. It annoys me that the MOD has some ridiculous policy of sending presents only to personally known troops. I say send them and we'll deliver them. It is a small amount of joy for people who have an indescribable time.

SIA

[XV277]

Two pencils, a pair of underpants and a crayonned sign saying 'Wibble......:ok:

[Utrinque Apparatus]

Sent to my son by his mates. Framed newspaper clippings about the nice Afghan lady eking out a living in a 1.2 million council supplied house in London on only 170,000 quid benefits a year :}