RAF Exchange Pilot upsets the yanks

[jayteeto]

Picture: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1025964/RAF-fighter-pilot-Afghanistan-ordered-trim-handlebar-moustache--Americans-say-long.html

He may be fighting the Taliban in Afghanistan, but an RAF fighter pilot is facing a battle of a different kind - keeping his handlebar moustache.

RAF pilots have a proud tradition of showing off their facial hair, but Flight Lieutenant Chris Ball hit turbulence when an American General told him to reduce the length of his handlebar offering.
After he refused, Chris, on an exchange posting with the American Air Force and currently operating in his 1,500mph F-15 fighter-bomber in Afghanistan, was told that American pilots were only allowed to grow small moustaches.
With the other pilots of the 366 Fighter Squadron wondering what their English colleague would do, Mr Ball turned to the Queen for help in saving his facial hair.
No, not her Majesty personally, but Queen's Regulations to find out the permitted size of an RAF moustache.
He measured it and to his delight discovered that the whiskers did not contravene the regulations.
Chris said: 'The yanks are not allowed to grow a full length tash.
'After I was told to trim mine down I had to dig out the Queen's Regulations to prove I was not breaching our own code.'
He took his findings to the General and after an 'exchange of views', emerged with a victory roll of his handlebar moustache.


Pip Pip Old Chap!!

[pohm1]

He took his findings to the General and after an 'exchange of views', emerged with a victory roll of his handlebar moustache.


Wonder if the General thought the Flt Lt was just getting lippy? :p


This thread wont last long hair today, gone tomorrow....

P1

[Affirmatron]

On that line of argument, if we had a Turkish exchange pilot, as the senior Turkish Officer he'd be able to shoot one of our troops each year.

[SaddamsLoveChild]

Is Chris short for Christine, if so I think I remember her from Cranwell........:ok:

[BOAC]

Go on, SLC - now tell us you 'had a Ball'.....................:)

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!]

Here's a chap with a "small moustache"

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/92/Drawing_of_Adolf_Hitler.jpg/180px-Drawing_of_Adolf_Hitler.jpg (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Drawing_of_Adolf_Hitler.jpg)

[D-IFF_ident]

Fantastic stuff - Sometimes the smallest victories are the most satisfying. Nice one Chris! :ok:

[Mr C Hinecap]

Chaps - I think this is a first.

This 'story' was in the latest RAF News. Do you think the Mail has lazy journalism and took the story too? RAF News - always the first to know.

[BEagle]

Spams with moustaches always seem to have something of the 'Blue Oyster' or 'YMCA' about them.....:suspect:


...and they look like the pictures one used to see of 'spivs' in the 1950s!

[PPRuNeUser0139]

I once worked with a moustachioed USAF exchange officer who would shave his off prior to having his annual 'fitrep' photograph taken. He told me that moustaches were seen as not main stream..
He also brought in his plastic wrapped No1 which was in the finest condition of any No 1 uniform I'd ever seen. Worn once a year, moustache-less, for the photo..

[Bo Nalls]

A small amount of Google research unearths the USAF & RAF dress regs.


USAF - (http://afrotc.tamu.edu/Lead%20Lab/PSP/uniform.pdf)Mustache will not extend downward beyond the lipline of the upper lip or extend sideways beyond a vertical line drawn upward from the corner of the mouth. (http://afrotc.tamu.edu/Lead%20Lab/PSP/uniform.pdf)


RAF - If a moustache is worn, the upper lip is to be unshaven and the moustache is not to extend below the edge of the mouth. (http://www.raf.mod.uk/rafcms/mediafiles/96453EF0_ABE4_1A8E_F5DFFE866A594026.pdf)

Appears to indicate the RAF allow 'taches of any length, as long as they don't droop.

[Greenleader]

Not surprising that the service that allows top lip hair is also the one that has several pilots who thought being a bloke was too much and opted for a sex change! ;)

[VinRouge]

Appears to indicate the RAF allow 'taches of any length, as long as they don't droop.

Better get some moustache Viagra then!!!

[Mmmmnice]

An american colleague on exchange once explained that I would get nowhere within the USAF as I had a moustache and did not have a 'college degree' - nice to see they concentrate on the essentials! And I thought being able to fly competently would help...........

[Seldomfitforpurpose]

Mnice,

Not strictly true, you must be able to get on in the USAF as I recently saw a Major with a tash.................pity really as apart from that she was as fit as a robbers dog :E

[FLCH]

The F15 is awesome. I love the GR4 but this beast is about 50 per cent bigger and armed to the teeth. It is a truly phenomenal plane."


I say....a flogging for the old boy right after tea.... :}

[nunquamparatus]

Yes, but he was talking the truth - Strike Eagle vs GR4? Elephant raping a mouse is the analogy that comes to mind. But you are right though - you sort of picture clean, shaven young thrusting aircrew unstrapping from the jet, not some fat bloke with a slug balancing on his top lip.........................:E

[FFP]

Small victories are important indeed.

Another one he could try is walking around a deployed US base in his own clothes, while 1799 Yanks all wear their official PT kit (which I'm sure he does).......Because wearing of US PT gear would not readily identify you as a member of a foreign military, which you must be at all times (Geneva convention, Laws od armed conflict etc). AFI 16-107 if you need a reference ;)

Oh, and refuse the Anthrax shot. That would get the whole system wound up.......I'd imagine......

[Farfrompuken]

Chris earned the name "Safety Head" a few years ago, by using his bonce as a brake to protect the rest of his body in a kite flying incident.

I guess his tash is a further level of protection should the Safety Head be required again. Good thinking, Chris.

[xrba]

Some 40 years ago a US Navy Lt Cdr ops guy came across to our carrier at sea for a short visit, [I forget the reason]. He was preceded by a signal telling us we were NOT to remove his mustache [sic]. The gentleman concerned was adorned with a Kaiser Wilhelm type waxed structure on his upper lip, [unlike our full set only permitted items]. It also was unusual as it was quite curved at the ends, protruded a fair distance, like a warthog, and obviously it took considerable grooming to maintain the thing. It certainly would not have survived under a P2b mask, but he was not an aviator. A fair amount of discussion was carried out in the wardroom bar at lunchtime as to a:- the uses he put it to, perhaps as an aerial aboard, or some more exotic functions ashore......, and b:- whether removing one side only would contravene the signal! It is perhaps fortunate that he stayed on board only for a day, and so survived the attentions of our fighter squadron when the evenings' bar session was in full swing!! He could not have lasted a full tour with it, that's for sure.

[brickhistory]

Good on the guy for 'sticking it to the man.'

I'm unable to upload photos from work (shh, you ain't seen me, right?!), but may I refer the thread to Robin Olds as a wing commander in Vietnam. (Believe he also commanded an RAF squadron as well in the early 1950s).

FFP: the mandatory 'US PT gear' is roundly and deeply resented in the USAF. As is the PT itself...

Finally, while I can appreciate the humor and 'well done, chap' sentiments, would you be saying the same if were a US exchange pilot in one of your squadrons 'sticking it' to a flag officer?

[BOAC]

Strike Eagle vs GR4? Elephant raping a mouse is the analogy that comes to mind.- EEK! Speaking as one of the (GR3) mice that waxed the elephantine backsides of the F15s in Deci ACM range in the early 80's, I recall the panicky 'trumpeting' call of the Mayday call as not one, but both of my quarry's elastics broke (in the vertical) causing me to swifly sidestep the falling beast. Finished up escorting the wounded animal home on one (relit)

They always did say elephants were scared of mice:)

[threeputt]

Never could understand anyone wishing to cultivate on their upper lip that which grows wild on their arse anyway!!:E

3P:ok:

[Green Flash]

Well, the maint is easier when it's on the lip.


Believe me:};)

[Romeo Oscar Golf]

Finally, while I can appreciate the humor and 'well done, chap' sentiments, would you be saying the same if were a US exchange pilot in one of your squadrons 'sticking it' to a flag officer?

Most certainly, it's called one up for the mates! I suspect we could do with a lot more of it.:ok:

[Sloppy Link]

Up until 1912, it was a contravention of KRs for the Army to shave its upper lip.

[BEagle]

FFP: the mandatory 'US PT gear' is roundly and deeply resented in the USAF. As is the PT itself...

A mate was once on exchange on the AV-8 with the USMC. When invited to participate in some distasteful jogging around the base with the rest of the jarheads making '1-2-3-4, 'nited States Mreenkaw' noises, he affected a pained expression, before commenting "Run? RUN? Oh dear me, no. You see, old chap, British officers don't run - it would panic the troops!".

He also told them that he was quite capable of waxing their backsides at ACM without the need to spend hours lifting scrap iron in some gym - as he indeed proved on several occasions!

[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!]

In fairness though, I think it wasn't so much the moustache as the unusual items of uniform that got him in trouble

http://www.handlebarclub.co.uk/images/jurgenburkhardt.jpg

[Redcarpet]

Excellent work from Chris, made me chuckle. Hope the safety head has recovered.;)

[Farfrompuken]

I gather the Safety Head was able to appreciate the same joke about three times in a row due to his post-head-brake amnesia.

I'm sure he's recovered by now!

[artyhug]

Three times doesn't even begin to describe the evening of circular conversation we had the night of said kite/beach/head interface. What disturbs me is that the Daily Hate is quite sooooo far behind the world that it even drags a story from the RAF News months after he returned to the swamp.

Still the upside is that alot of beers are on you next weekend in Atlanta Ballsy. Clearly the Tactical Discussion Procedure Update members will bill him large.....

[West Coast]

A mate was once on exchange on the AV-8 with the USMC.

You sure have a lot of mates, all johnny on the spot with Yank stories.

Over here we call them tall tales.

I only knew one Brit exchange pilot. He was nice enough to park a F18 in the warning area off Kaneohe Bay. When the aviators went to the carrier he had to sit in the squadron all by his lonesome.

[Dan Winterland]

I think I can corroborate that story. The chap was the archetypal British Officer and about as far away from the USMC image as you could possibly imagine. He completely confounded them with his laissez faire attitude, but he was one of the best pilots I've ever flown with and highly respected the other side of the Atlantic.

If it's the same person that is. If not, there was more than one of them!

[BEagle]

My code does not include lying, cheating or stealing, Westie? Yours??

Did you mean the AV-8 mate, Dan? Your description is spot-on and he certainly did perplex them with his True Brit attitude! I think he later became a QFI, but am not sure. His brother had been a well-known Lightning driver.

The character in question had also been one of the infamous '7 Hunter refresher' course students back in 1975 when I was doing the Gnat course. A 'Who's who' of future RAF fast jet 'characters', the PMC once tried to throw them off the OM lawn at Valley for being 'improperly dressed'.......

If Jindabyne is reading this, he will no doubt remember the lingering smell of stale beer in the crewroom whenever 7 Hunter came to work! One of their number (who sadly died in a GR3 crash in Germany some years later) recovered on minima on the first wave of the day, then overshot and went round for another circuit. When later questioned, he'd admitted that he wasn't feeling terribly bright after another Nasty Newcastle session, had barfed all over the instrument panel on the break and then had to clear diced carrots and tomatoes off the ASI before he could land..... RIP, Stoney.

[D-IFF_ident]

brickhistory. Absolutely, anyone 'sticking it to the man', so to speak, gets a round of applause from me. Your reaction supports the notion that some people in the US take some things too seriously... Which kind of proves Chris' point.

[brickhistory]

D-IFF, read my post again.

To make it easy for you, the intent was/is: Can you 'get' as good as you give?

If so, ok.

You did read the part where I congratulated the hirsute Eagle driver?

[Pylot]

How I laughed when I saw this one on TV, and I recall the safety head incident, it was legendary at Valley.
More of us sport an aviators handlebar moustaches. Anyone up for a competition? You have until the of 8th of August Farfrompukin!

[D-IFF_ident]

D-IFF, read my post again.

To make it easy for you, the intent was/is: Can you 'get' as good as you give?

If so, ok.

You did read the part where I congratulated the hirsute Eagle driver?

Read it again - no change to my post required.

And yes, we can. But I'm wondering if you can, which, again, proves the point.

[brickhistory]

D-IFF, does 'whatever' translate?

[D-IFF_ident]

Brick,

Absolutely. Does QED?

[brickhistory]

Does QED?

Les' see...airfield in Kuwait?

Nope, that's not right.

Umm, high school equivalency degree?

No, no, don't tell me..,

A lack of a sense of humor and fairplay?

I'm done with this. I look forward to you having the last word, then moving on with my life.

Like the temporary Eagle guy. Back flying not that now I understand.

[Two's in]

Nothing beats being given the opportunity to be an Ambassador for your country, representing the highest traditions of the service, and demonstrating the flexibility and adaptability to work effectively in any type of environment without complaint. Or answer (b).

It's like JO'S, JNCO's and Students being all left wing and gobby until they understand the way the world works. It's expected, but that doesn't make it clever.

[Farfrompuken]

Pylot,

Noted:ok:

[Dan Winterland]

I have the 'good fortune' to work with a lot of Australians. Every year in November in Australia, a charity event known as 'Mo-vember occurs where a lot of men (and probably some women as well!) gro a 'mo' - or moustache!

Last year, the event was also held at my airline and about two thirds of the pilots grew mos. It cost each participant about 30 quid to join and the cash went to prostate cancer research. At the end of the month, a p!ss up was held with prizes for the best/worst/hairiest/scariest etc being awarded followed by the shaving off ceremony. It was a great event which led to an severe outbreak of morale. Our chief pilot shaved to one he had originally to start again.

The downside was that everyone looked like a prat for about a week while they tried to grow a top lip eyebrow. And mine took on a truley alarming Freddie Mercury look. After being chatted up by gays twice (once while Mrs W was standing next to me much to her amusement) I decided to try the Clarke Gable look. Unfortunately, it made me look like child molester.

I think we're planning to do it this year. If a whole Air Force did it, that would be an event!

[Liam Gallagher]

Not to be outdone, the ladies have their hair growth month in January...

I believe it's known as "Fanuary"

[Squeezer]

LOL In raptures mate!

[GOLF_BRAVO_ZULU]

Speaking as someone whose top lip has never, ever, had a razor scraped across it, I'd just like to say how much this Thread has amused me. Brilliant.

[Ewan Whosearmy]

Beagle

I'd have paid to watch you tell this Spam that he looked like something from the YMCA:

http://www.keytlaw.com/F-4/images/col_olds.jpg

Commander No. 1 Squadron, RAF.

USAF: 4 Mig kills. 259 combat missions.

[FFP]

Before we start on the lip growth, full bird or not, he can take his f**king hat off on the flightline for starters.........:E

[BEagle]

Yep, definitely like someone from The Village People.....

The moustache of Hard Hat - and Biker's 'chaps' (arseless leather fag pants).

Dan W knows more about the Disco era than me - so perhaps he can corroborate?

[Ewan Whosearmy]

FFP

Yeah, because that's really important in the overall context of things.

[Green Flash]

And I'd have paid to watch you say that to his face!;):ok:

For those of us slightly younger than some of us, it's Col Robin Olds.

[Ewan Whosearmy]

Assume that the Disco era was a little after your time, Beagle. Charlston era for you, was it?

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/41/Baker_Charleston.jpg

[BEagle]

The lady who gave you that signed phot was taking a risk with that mirrored floor, Ewan.....:eek: Almost a secondary smile in view..:ooh:

And yes, I do know who the legendary Robin Olds was. A true fighter pilot - and would certainly have laughed it off if he was asked whether his penchant for that moustache stemmed from his YMCA days! 'tis true - he did once live in the YMCA.

Sound chap with a healthy contempt for useless politicians and inept seniors. RIP

[Ewan Whosearmy]

Beagle

Indeed. I wonder what happened to the bottom half of the photo!?

I would echo everything you say about Olds' credentials, but I am not convinced that he'd have laughed at the YMCA suggestion!

[FFP]

FFP

Yeah, because that's really important in the overall context of things.

Like the length of a moustache ?

[Logistics Loader]

Anyone know Flt/Lt Bob Bickers (ALM)

I met him thru the gliding club at Gutersloh some years ago and was impressed with his Jimmy Edwards style facial hair.

Apparantly Bob was on parade for "Aunty Liz" one week and she commented on his fine facial hair.

Some time later the SWO picked him up on his growth. Bob unimpressed replied "if it was good enough for her Majesty, then this facial hair is deemed by "Royal Appointment".... SWO left totally gobsmacked by that remark...!!

[West Coast]

Beagle

When Robin Olds was ordered to shave his mustache off by a General Officer, he did so.

[D-IFF_ident]

West Coast,

Could that be because Col Olds was a member of the USAF and, therefore, required to adhere to the regulations contained within AFI36-2903?

A member of the RAF, on the other hand, would be required to adhere to the regulations contained within the Queen's Regulations for the Royal Air Force. Could an order, even from a General, to contravene QRs could be classed as an illegal order?

Perhaps there is a reference to exchange personnel being required to adhere to regulations of the foreign service with regard to uniform, facial hair, etc that I have missed?

[TommyGun]

Now, I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you to our commanding officer at Top Gun - the very first man to win the Top Gun trophy. You will not find a finer fighter pilot anywhere in the world: Commander Mike Metcalf - Callsign 'Viper'.

Sorry couldn't resist...

[teeteringhead]

I think our cousins have never truly thrown off the puritan mantle of their founding fathers ... or the Monroe Doctrine either...

One recalls a chum on an exchange posting who was virtually accused of being an alky, when it became known that his misssus always had a cold can of beer or G&T waiting for him after work....

...... and this was New Mexico in the summer!

BEags .... aahh Stoney! One can never forget watching his part in the last Lightning formation leaving Gutersloh ..... particularly when the burners didn't! RIP indeed.....:(

[1588]

From what I remember of Chris, I'm surprised baby face can manage to grow any form of moustache!!!!