£180 for a new Ballgown-wish I hadn't bothered

[Axel-Flo]

Well, it just cost me 180 sheets to buy the current Mrs Flo a new ballgown (not too sure why since she's only had her previous other one for about 4 years and my mess kit is in alot worse condition and is nearly15 years old, but I digress) Every year the Ball committee set a dress standard and put it down on the ball invitation, adding the little rider that guests inappropriately dressed will be asked to leave (Yeah Right...never #kin happens) Now I am getting fed up of passing on the dress code (debrettes and the BRNC Guide to Young Officers have a decode of them all-pretty much) to Mrs Flo and any civvy guests we have invited only to have it rammed down our throats when we arrive, at said event, to see mess members and many of thier guest blatantly ignoring the dress code. Ballerina, Black Tie, Ballgown, Formal etc etc. My guests (and Mrs Flo) ask why I came out with a dress code to which they have conformed, usually at some expense, when they need not have bothered as others obviously haven't...just drag out a cocktail dress or something it makes no #kin difference anyway and frees up £180 for decent wine and champagne.

"An anuvver fing" .... didn't champagne breakfast used to be a perk for the real survivors of a ball. I seem to remember (could be a mind fuddled by age and senility though) it started at around 5ish and not the current 2-3, there were never loads of us there but hey that's natural selection. By simply dumbing down the standards of these things it just seems to cheapen the whole thing. And those kind of events/parties are available down town anywhere each and every weekend.

Be there and cope, if you can't cope dont be there...!:E

[Pontius Navigator]

And at Akrotiri breakfast was at 7, 5 was for wimps.

[Zoom]

That's one thing I really miss in Civvy Street - the Summer Ball. They just don't do it as well or as cheaply out here. So any of you who are thinking of complaining about the price or the food or the dress or the music - don't. Just enjoy, because you will miss it too one day.

[Lionel Lion]

Kinda concur on the dress standards..........but my other side says nicely buffed chicks in short skirts mmmmmmmmm

Must be getting old:=

[Axel-Flo]

Zoom....It's not a bleat about the food or music or dress standard though regardless of what you pay it doesn't mean any of it should be above criticism. I have been to some superbly organised balls and likewise some that are dreadful just accepting what you're given and being gratefull of whatever it is, if that's what your suggesting, ain't a great way to proceed.

Likewise, I too am happy to look at shorter and shorter skirts and truly well presented-buffed or not- daughters, wives and or girlfriends (as long as Mrs Flo doesn't catch me looking for more than a micro second at a time). However, if you don't want a dress standard don't put one down on the invitation and make it a free for all (not what i would opt for) as I said, when you pass on to your guests and partners the supposed dress code and subsequently find that no action is taken against those who don't conform you kind of feel you have failed to justify to your guests why they felt obliged to make the effort.

It's like watching your stude bong his MDH on the IRT profile and then seeing the examiner pass him anyway. He/she (the stude that is)wants to know why you bothered going on about it so much (not busting MDH ) so much in the training package and pre rides.

[Icarusthesecond]

£180 !!!!

Where did you get that from Mattalan?

Please tell me it's not just me that falls for the "We have to go to London and get a dress, that way I will be sure not to clash".

Still, so many threads on this forum are about deteriorating standards, if spend a few quid (a very few quid in some cases) on a dress to conform to a tradition / habit (delete as necessary depending on service seniority). Then so be it.

Cheap booze, average food and a bounty of gorgeous wenches, always going to make a good evening.
:ok:

[teeteringhead]

Just enjoy, because you will miss it too one day ....not necessarily .... that's what Retired Membership is for! And unlike Honorary Membership, you don't have to wait to be asked ......:ok:

[Helli-Gurl]

That's peanuts for a decent ball gown...just hope Mr Helli-Gurl doesnt read this ;) sorry hun....

My last ball gown was well over one thousand pounds, not going to say how much as I'm bound to get a lecture from Mr H-G re my frivolous waste of money.....

Guess if you something unique you have to do what Icarusthe second says and go shopping somewhere exclusive.

Must admit find it hard myself to justify it but when it comes to the ball season,....it's war out there!

;)
x

[Axel-Flo]

So maybe £180 for a dress isn't much in which case all those who couldn't be bothered spending as little as that need a shove in the Standards direction. I don't object to shelling out, it was the lack of requirement of and enforcement of the layed down standard I objected to. :rolleyes:

[Onan the Clumsy]

I think the underlying subtext of the first post can be encapsulated in this extracted phrase...just drag out a cocktail dress It's ok, you're amongst friends here. :cool:


btw, how much did you have to pay for the size 13 shoes? :}

[Roghead]

I understand A/F's complaint to be one of a lowering of dress standards rather than the cost of complying (to the invitation standard) If that is the case, I fully agree. I retired back in the early 80's and have not been to a civvie function which comes within shouting distance of a Summer Ball.
Mind you I did fall foul of "dress standards" many years ago and was asked to leave by the PMC . My crime was to wear stiff white shirt,wing collar and white waist coat (after it was deemed for Royal occasions only) and removing my jacket to drape over the shivering shoulders of my wife - we were in an unheated marquee and the Ball was in Germany in October.
On this occasion I won when the Staish told the pratt of a PMC to back off.

[MOSTAFA]

I'm certain Mrs Axel-Flo looked as lovely as the other ladies present and perhaps added a little grace to the laddette (is that how its spelt?) society.

[Good Mickey]

AF,

more money than sense? Next time check out ebay, you'll get change from £30 for something very respectable. For the record 'the wife', 2 civvy guests and I had a cracking time........I guess there's no pleasing some people!!

GM

[False Capture]

Regarding dresses and money, I was once told: "the more you pay the less you get". The lady who said this was wearing a very expensive dress!:ok:

[Cambridge Crash]

If you want a dressy affair, the May Balls (in June) at Cambridge are very strict. Take, for example, the dress tandards for the College that I am affiliated to: white collar evening attire for men and strict interpretation of the dress standards for the women; tickets can be in excess of £350 for a vip ticket; hovering about £150 each for a junior member. Stiff prices for a student, but the quality is much better than your average RAF Summer Ball. No tacky decorations made from triwalls, either.

Oh, VIP ticket holders got taken to Paris for the champagne breakfast...

Yes, I know, these lot should all be shot for supporting a capitalist system based on exploitation. But the Balls are fun....

CC

[BEagle]

The downside being you have to mix with a load of Tabs......

[Axel-Flo]

Look, the point of the thread was not a bleat about the ball but a wish/hope for a maintainance of standards. (Beags...I actually got alot of that from the likes of -and- you) Especially since I (bold/capital/underline...don't know how to do it) told my guests these, as advertised in the invitation, were the standards required.

I know of functions in the Sergeants mess where they have been prepared to uphold and enforce the standards more so than I have seen recently. I would so much rather pay more and do it less often if at the end of it you got what you paid for.

Oh and just out of interest Health and Safety won't let you make decorations out of tri-walls anymore....though it must be said when Squadrons/units got allocated a room each to dress and decorate (using said cardboard) there were some incredible efforts made and superb inventions.:ok

[PlasticCabDriver]

Axel, Mrs Flo? Something you're not telling us?

[PoorPongo]

As a member of the service most likely to get accused of getting all (unnecessarily) excited about Dress Standards etc then I have to admit to finding this all slightly amusing/surprising. I have never been to an Army Officers Mess Summer Ball at which there was any contention about dress standards - for either sex (Sgts Mess may get more excited, I don't know. Someone out there will be able to tell me). The rules by which most of our messes are run are actually pretty simple. The general rule is ' You are all Ladies/Gentlemen - behave as such'. So no dodgy suits (=shiny), shoes (=not shiny) and no dresses/outfits that might actually cause offence. And we had plenty of short skirts, often worn by Sqn Comds wives if they had the legs.

Surely the key rules are not about length etc but simply about managing to wear whatever clothing with appropriate style. Bring on the short skirts, I say. Get's me going right and proper...

PS Last summer I tried telling Mrs PP that the theme for the ball was 'Wear the dress you wore to the best ball you went to last year'... Unsuccessful but worth a try....

PP

[Testingtheseatlimit]

I have to say that this was the first Summer Ball we have been to for about 4 years and standards of dress had dropped dramatically, the girls still looked great though. But more disappointing than that was the sheer numbers of silly fairground attractions which seemed to be at the expense of some decent food at the main buffet. I reckon the local Rugby Club Ball was about as classy and I guess that is the bottom line. Bring back Balls where the emphasis is back on dancing, good food and good socialising!! I think I'll stick to Christmas Draws until such time!

[tradewind]

Testing

I'd say you need to put the emphasis on boozing and then everything else suddenly gets more appealing.

[StopStart]

Poor dress standards?
One of the dangers of commissioning the Working Classes I suspect...

;)

[chippy63]

Charity shops, ladies, out of town charity shops in top end areas:ok:

[KENNYR]

Axel-FLo, I'm afraid it is a sign of the times. Tradition within the Officers Mess and the Sergeants Mess has been eroding away steadily as the new, politically correct generation take over. Farming out the running of the messes to civilians was just about the last straw.

Go to the ball, dress in the traditional mess kit, your wife/girlfriend in her traditional long ball gown and have a whale of a time. Ignore what others are wearing, you have absolutely no say in it, unless you want to get up on your hind legs at the next mess meeting and let fly at the upper echelons of the mess hierarchy!!!

[Axel-Flo]

PCD.......NO!

We did go we did enjoy it, and despite all the grumpy old men type comments I made, the big thing point for me was simply trying to justify to my guests why I had sort of insisted that the appropriate ettiquette thing to do was abide by the dress requirements on the invitation. Had they not annotated it so I would have worn the same mess kit, Mrs Flo (also known as centrifugal to close friends and relatives) would have worn the ball gown (yep even the cheap £180 job) Lets just not pretend we are aiming at standards we have no intention or desire to uphold or enforce. :ok:

[PerArdua]

Axel-Flo
I was probably at the same one as you and my wife and guests were all wearing the correct dress standards as dictated on the tickets. My guests commented about the complete lack of standards among some of the other guests and I had to apologise and say they must be associate members but I did see some senior officers partners missing the standard by some margin. The real nail in the coffin for me was an inappropriately dressed older lady and daughter 'smoking' in a public room. She couldn't see why she shouldn't smoke there!!!

Still it was a brilliant evening and my guests thought it was the best they had attended. Whinge over

PA

[31Goldstar]

Always nice to get one over! Never a chore!
That'll teach Shee Rack to have a pop at our grub!

Fancy some humble pie!

[Fg Off Bloggs]

Wrong subject matter, Goldstar! Try again on the Olympics forum. This forum is about Summer Balls and the lack of adherence to the dress code!

Never were very sharp on 31 Sqn!

[Dancing Bear]

Have to confess to agreeing with AF on this one, which considering I joined as SL Aircrew feels very strange and a bit hypocritical!!

Mrs Bear and some civvie friends will be joining me to attend the current establishments (Non WAFU Mess) ball in a couple of weeks, have to say she has been a star and found the most fantastic dress for a snip and looks a million dollars in it, do hope you read this dear..........

However it does appear ridiculous to put a dress code on a ball ticket and not enforce it, surely an edict from the Mess Press a month or 6 weeks before to try and ensure attendees attire themselves correctly, or option B, scrap the dress code and accept that era is passed and people can come in just about anything that claims to be decent.

Hey ho must be getting old I guess!!

[Safety_Helmut]

Notice on the intranet site at sunny Wyton regarding the forthcoming SNCOs' Mess Ball. Stating that the CMC would be at the entrance to greet everyone, oh yes, and to warn that those not meeting appropriate standards would be refused entry.

Some things shouldn't change, and some things just won't change, but they might die a long slow death.

Safety_Helmut

[Axel-Flo]

Well done the Wyton CMC. He's nailed his colours to the mast and more to the point is going to stand by them. Mr who ever you are I doff my hat to you.

[SmilingKnifed]

Having been to one summer ball where the PMC's wife wore a dress revealing her midriff (I kid you not) then it becomes clear that the slip in standards seems to be across the board, even amongst those supposedly enforcing them.

[DuaneDibley]

Went to one Summer Ball at ISK where the CMC's wife wore a dress that exactly matched the colour and spacing of the Marquee's blue and white vertical stripes. Watching her hubby's frantic attempts to remain "locked on" to her while dancing was priceless..........