You Know You Are In Africa When.....
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Botswana & Greece
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Yes well Cape. Here in Maun we have a new runway which will take big jets but a terminal which can only handle a handful of pax at a time. Also a tower which now doesn't comply with ICAO regs due to the increased airfield area. What a waste of money.
Then there is the airport police station. A station commander who pitches up at 10.00 if you are lucky and other senior officers and ranks who do absolutely nothing but chat. Great place to get stupid papers signed though. They have got nothing else to do.
Then there is the airport police station. A station commander who pitches up at 10.00 if you are lucky and other senior officers and ranks who do absolutely nothing but chat. Great place to get stupid papers signed though. They have got nothing else to do.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: UK
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At Takoradi Airport, Ghana there is a main road crossing the runway between the town and the local residentual area. Anything and everything crosses the runway there. People, cars, trucks you name it un checked by any form of security. However to their credit, they have a siren and booms to stop people and traffic when an plane is about to land. This is also their local airfarce (spelling intended) base.
Really?
Been here over 5 years and never noticed it! Maybe time to get my eyes checked.
Or are you referring to the small dirt track the locals use to scurry across the runway illegally?
Really?
Been here over 5 years and never noticed it! Maybe time to get my eyes checked.
Or are you referring to the small dirt track the locals use to scurry across the runway illegally?
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: A little south of the "Black Sheep" brewery
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A little 'old news' now, but doesn't this fit here: BBC News - Air Tanzania pilots leave passengers to Comoros stranded?
Join Date: Mar 2014
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You know you are in Africa, when the FO is filling a quarter-empty Tusker's can with aero-oil and walks out to put into the piston engine ... no kiddin, happened to me a few days ago.
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Reet here
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...when you leave the country's (perhaps continent's) largest airport at around 22:30. There are another two scheduled international flights leaving at roughly the same time, a total of about 500 SLF going toward air-side.
There are 2 (TWO) passport control officers on duty. When they have processed about 300 of the pax, a third officer comes on duty. When asked why there are only 3 officers, the answer is "I was phoned about an hour ago (on my day off) to come in and work. Dunno where the people who are supposed to be on duty are..."
There are 2 (TWO) passport control officers on duty. When they have processed about 300 of the pax, a third officer comes on duty. When asked why there are only 3 officers, the answer is "I was phoned about an hour ago (on my day off) to come in and work. Dunno where the people who are supposed to be on duty are..."
Sometime ago now of course, preparing for departure from Nairobi at night, somewhat cold(ish) to the point that we were actually wearing our uniform jackets. Asked the Tower for the surface conditions and was told that the temperature was 28 (C) !! At that temp and altitude we couldn't get a 747 airborne for Uganda, never mind Rome. Stn.Mgr. suggested we visit the tower to confirm, and we climbed up to be greeted by a cold African wearing an army greatcoat, a balaclava and gloves with the ends of the fingers cut off.
What's the temperature, we asked ? "28 deg. Suh." he answered, and pointed to a little wooden thermometer hanging on the wall over an electric heater that he had taken up to keep warm. We asked him what he thought the instruments on the console were for, and just got a shrug and a repetition that the temperature was 28. We noted the temperature, 10c and altimeter setting and left him warming his hands. I kid you not.
On another occasion at NBO we had been in and out all week with a wind favouring runway 24 (is it ? memory?) and there was no apparent difference in the weather pattern that night, but on that departure the tower was giving 06 as the duty runway without the wind direction also included. A landing aircraft complained of significant tailwind on landing, and suggested that ATC change the duty runway. We were cleared to taxy to 06 for departure - what to do ? Does one deliberately disobey an ATC instruction ?
Answers on a postcard - and I'm admitting nothing.
What's the temperature, we asked ? "28 deg. Suh." he answered, and pointed to a little wooden thermometer hanging on the wall over an electric heater that he had taken up to keep warm. We asked him what he thought the instruments on the console were for, and just got a shrug and a repetition that the temperature was 28. We noted the temperature, 10c and altimeter setting and left him warming his hands. I kid you not.
On another occasion at NBO we had been in and out all week with a wind favouring runway 24 (is it ? memory?) and there was no apparent difference in the weather pattern that night, but on that departure the tower was giving 06 as the duty runway without the wind direction also included. A landing aircraft complained of significant tailwind on landing, and suggested that ATC change the duty runway. We were cleared to taxy to 06 for departure - what to do ? Does one deliberately disobey an ATC instruction ?
Answers on a postcard - and I'm admitting nothing.
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: In transit
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The beach is like this :
· 69 children were left behind and by the end of the week, 31 had still not found their parents. And all parents/adults had gone home to JHB by that stage.
· 9 bodies washed up on the beach in the week after New Year. None of them were ever reported missing, and none have yet been identified.
· The beach was so full of defecation that they had to plough/dig it in to the beach rather than pick it all up!
· 69 children were left behind and by the end of the week, 31 had still not found their parents. And all parents/adults had gone home to JHB by that stage.
· 9 bodies washed up on the beach in the week after New Year. None of them were ever reported missing, and none have yet been identified.
· The beach was so full of defecation that they had to plough/dig it in to the beach rather than pick it all up!
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Surrounding the localizer
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When you are cleared for the ILS onto a runway with no ILS, no VOR, no NDB and no lights....on rollout you are cleared for a visual approach....and the tower asks if you have any "blonde trolly pushhaas!" On board....
Join Date: Feb 2015
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Africa is South of the 58 parallel and once you leave it you are on your own where they have square tyres and it wont change Best to keep out of the place full of corruption travel light and be ready to leave the Only good thing about Africa is when the wheels come up on the plane
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Africa
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And as they ride on their square tires you can enjoy all the wealth that those living north of the 58 parallel have sucked out of the continent successfully destroying it along the way
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NW Africa / DFFD
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I was doing a milk run from GABS the other day. The tower controller stated "without delay, cleared for takeoff..." As I approached V1, my copilot called an abort. We stopped the plane and I queried on why we aborted, and he stated the tower had cancelled our clearance. When I called the tower asking why he canceled our takeoff clearance on the roll, he responded "I cleared you for takeoff, just not that fast, I wasn't ready for you yet..."
This was the same controller that told me to exit at taxiway A, and when I asked if he wanted me to give way to the airplane already on A he said "what, there is an airplane there? I can't see through the papers on the window..."
This was the same controller that told me to exit at taxiway A, and when I asked if he wanted me to give way to the airplane already on A he said "what, there is an airplane there? I can't see through the papers on the window..."
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: France
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Lol! This guy in GABS is funny. His speech flow is better than JFK's... but last time I've found how to make him speak normally. Just do the same when you give him informations, just make it unreadable and very fast. You'll be surprised how good he is in radio communication 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Near the source of insanity
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Jumpindan: Haha, that is hilarious
Reminds me of Dar where for the longest time there was no working radar and everything was visual. Just that the windows the French contractor installed in the 70's were not UV resistant and became completely opaque! So there these guys are, asking position reports left right and center all the time, clogging the airwaves and make us wonder just how stupid they could possibly be while in reality they did an outstanding job considering they simply couldn't see 
out their windows for years and years. 
Window panes were finally replaced last year. And the radar works again, too. Wohoo!
This was the same controller that told me to exit at taxiway A, and when I asked if he wanted me to give way to the airplane already on A he said "what, there is an airplane there? I can't see through the papers on the window..."
out their windows for years and years. Window panes were finally replaced last year. And the radar works again, too. Wohoo!
Join Date: Mar 2012
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You know...
When you are on short final (during the night) and ask the controller if he can dim the runway lights... after which he switches off all airport lights!