As SLF I'd just like to say these are great! I've worked in customer service before and received some abuse during my time doing various customer facing jobs at a major UK visitor attraction.
A few from me:
On a flight last year, one of the pilots pops out to use the lav. My friend looks at me, and in a concerned voice, says, "Erm, who's flying if here's out here?" This was after a PA introducing both pilots...
Not so much a thick comment, but circa 2006 flying to NYC, I had major issues with those visa waiver forms. Took me about 5 attempts to write everything in the right place.
And now, some from my work, just to prove it's not a phenomenon only experienced in the air. I should point out, all "responses" I post below were strictly in my head.
"After we've paid you here, are the rides free inside?" For £35 admission, I should hope so!
"Is the monorail a ride?" Yes, a ride straight back to the carpark you've just come from...
Different job, same company:
"You've changed the date of my booking, you've ruined my 21st birthday". Actually madam, we're not allowed to change bookings without customer approval, you booked the wrong date...
"Are you very strict with your height restrictions? My son is 5cm too short but will they let him on anyway?" Words failed me with this one...
"What will the weather be like on the weekend of X and Y 2015?" I don't know, let me consult my crystal ball...
To all CC, you have my utmost respect! I'd probably end up beating someone with a teapot or something...