Haven't read the whole thread so apologies if these have been posted before.
There was once a very (in)famous Gulf Air CC who amongst other stories came out with the following:
CC: Would you like breakfast sir?
Male SLF: (upon opening the tray to find 2 sausages and scrambled eggs), Are these sausages muslim?
CC: Yes sir, that ones Mohammed and the other ones Ahmed.
Lady GCC national with whiffy baby, hands the baby to CC and says "Change the baby"
Cc goes off down the cabin finds another baby, asks its parents if she can borrow it for a few minutes takes it to first lady and says "I've changed your baby here is the replacement"
And she didn't get fired