A colleague heard the following recently on the way into Schiphol.
AMS Controller: Continental XXX give me a good rate please through FL100?
Continental XXX: Well sir, we are doing 2000fpm
AMS: Could you make it 3000 fpm?
Continental XXX: No Sir.
AMS: Oh do you not have a speedbrake?
Continental: Yes sir, I do, but that is for MY mistakes, not for YOURS!